Martin William - The parents Tao te ching: ancient advice for Mmodern parents

PRAISE FOR THE PARENTS TAO TE CHING This book is pure gold. It comes as close to teaching the unteachable as anything I have ever read. If you are a parent, you have no choiceyou must keep this book within reach at all times. HUGH PRATHER, parent, minister, author of Notes to Myself, and coauthor, with Gayle Prather, of Spiritual Parenting: A Guide to Understanding and Nurturing the Heart of Your Child William Martin shows how the universal lessons of Taoism can be applied to parenthood. In the process, he not only sheds light on the most sacred of tasks we face, but he also works to bring peace and understanding to a coming generation. DENG MING-DAO, author of The Chronicles of Tao, 365 Tao and Everyday Tao I loved William Martins The Parents Tao Te Ching.

Advocating patience, compassion, simplicity, and parental awareness, these ancient lessons allow mothers and fathers to quickly reflect on their own selfhood, then to see and respond to their childrens authentic selves. Every parent should keep this book on their bedside table to read and reread as they negotiate the tumultuous reality of family life. VIRGINIA BEANE RUTTER, Jungian analyst and author of Celebrating Girls: Nurturing and Empowering Our Daughters Many of the designations used by manufacturers and sellers to distinguish their products are claimed as trademarks. Where those designations appear in this book and Da Capo Press was aware of a trademark claim, the designations have been printed in initial capital letters. Copyright 1999 by William Martin Illustrations copyright 1999 by Hank Tusinski Foreword copyright 1999 by Dan Millman All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without the prior written permission of the publisher.

For information, address Da Capo Press, 11 Cambridge Center, Cambridge, MA 02142. Designed by Pauline Neuwirth, Neuwirth & Associates, Inc. Cataloging-in-Publication data for this book is available from the Library of Congress. ISBN: 978-0-78675-207-2 Published by Da Capo Press A Member of the Perseus Books Group www.dacapopress.com Note: The information in this book is true and complete to the best of our knowledge. This book is intended only as an informative guide for those wishing to know more about health issues. In no way is this book intended to replace, countermand, or conflict with the advice given to you by your own physician.

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It requires a man of rare wisdom, insight, and heart. Bill Martin is such a man. The Parents Tao Te Ching is such a book. Not since the Tao of Pooh has Taoist wisdom transmogrified into something so practical, gentle, and good. Few things in this world are as important as raising children. In every age, every era, every time and place, children are our treasures, our future, our immortalitythe vital link in the chain of humanity.

What better form of service? What better charity to whom we might give of our wealth, our hands, and our hearts? Children remind us of who we were and who we may yet become. They are our innocence, our purity, our potential. Children have never been very good at listening to what their parents tell them, James Baldwin wrote, but they never fail to imitate them. We can only teach by example, Bill Martin reminds us. By improving our own actions, and, in the words of Aldous Huxley, trying to be a little kinder, we raise not only our children, but our childrens standards. As a father of three and grandfather of two, Ive come belatedly to a fuller appreciation of parenthood as a path of spiritual growth.

Its not for the faint-hearted, and its not for everyone. Making babieshaving childrenis a capacity bestowed by biology, but raising them well is an art we learn by doing. Mature adults dont necessarily create children, the proverb goes, but children help create mature adults. The Tao Te Ching, with all its universal wisdom, never struck me as a manual on child rearing, but why not? Universal wisdom applies to every domain, maybe even gardening or motorcycle maintenance. But Bill Martin brings some of the inspiration of Kahlil Gibran, and perhaps even Rumi, to create not abstract poetry, but divinely practical prose. A gift to parents everywhere, The Parents Tao Te Ching is filled with reminders of who we can become as we artfully help our children, the same way we might gently guide the branches of a tree to grow straight and tall toward the sun.

Another proverb reminds us that children are not vessels to be filled, but candles to be lit. So are parents. So are we all. By listening to the wisdom of the Tao as we raise our children, we raise ourselves and lift our spirits. Dan Millman San Rafael, California Author of Way of the Peaceful Warrior