J. Thomas Fitch - Questions Kids Ask about Sex: Honest Answers for Every Age

As a pediatrician for more than thirty years, Ive yet to find a sexual education parenting book as complete and comprehensive as Questions Kids Ask about Sexa book Ill keep in my office for parents to read and encourage them to have from the time their children are born. Thank you for helping pediatricians like me raise healthy, happy, and well-functioning children in the context of a supportive family home.

Joseph R. Zanga, MD, FAAP, FCP
President, American College of Pediatricians
Past President, American Academy of Pediatrics
Jefferson-Pilot Distinguished Professor, East Carolina University

Questions Kids
Ask about Sex

Honest Answers for Every Age

The Medical Institute
for Sexual Health

Melissa R. Cox, editor

2005 by The Medical Institute for Sexual Health

Published by Fleming H. Revell
a division of Baker Publishing Group
P.O. Box 6287, Grand Rapids, MI 49516-6287

Printed in the United States of America

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any meansfor example, electronic, photocopy, recordingwithout the prior written permission of the publisher. The only exception is brief quotations in printed reviews.

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Questions kids ask about sex : honest answers for every age / Melissa R. Cox, editor.
p. cm.
Includes bibliographical references and index.
ISBN 0-8007-1878-X (cloth)
1. Sex instruction for children. 2. Sex instruction for youth. 3. Sex instruction.
I. Cox, Melissa R.
HQ57.Q47 2005
649'.65dc22

2005013670

Published in association with the literary agency of Alive Communications, Inc., 7680 Goddard Street, Suite 200, Colorado Springs, CO 80920.

J. T.

Thank you for dreaming that this book could become a reality. Your patience, persistence, and sheer determination have been the source of strength for all of us.

The Medical Institute

Alan

Thanks for dreaming with us so many years ago about this project: without your insight we would not have made it here.

Melissa Cox and J. Thomas Fitch

Logan and Keegan

This project was a passion prior to your births. Your curiosity was the basis for many questions, and your innocence motivated us all. Heres to your future! Thanks for being our creative inspiration.

Melissa Cox

Contents

This book would not have been possible without the tireless efforts of all the individuals involved. The Medical Institute for Sexual Health would like to thank each and every one of them for their contribution and passion to help motivate parents to talk with their children about sex.

Writing Team

Melissa R. Cox, Highlands Ranch, Colorado

J. Thomas Fitch, M.D., Pediatrics, San Antonio, Texas

Patricia Francis, M.D., Pediatrics, Moraga, California

Wilson Wayne Grant, M.D., Pediatrics, San Antonio, Texas

Marilyn A. Maxwell, M.D., Internal Medicine/Pediatrics, St. Louis, Missouri

Joe S. McIlhaney Jr., M.D., Obstetrics/Gynecology, Austin, Texas

Margaret J. Meeker, M.D., Pediatrics, Traverse City, Michigan

Paul A. Warren, M.D., Behavioral Pediatrics, Plano, Texas

Contributors

W. David Hager, M.D., Obstetrics/Gynecology, Lexington, Kentucky

Joneen Krauth Mackenzie, RN, BSN, WAIT Training, Denver, Colorado

Lynn Lutz, Ph.D., Dallas, Texas

Mary Anne Nelson, M.D., Cedar Rapids, Iowa

Curtis C. Stine, M.D., Tallahassee, Florida

Research Editor

Anjum Khurshid, MBBS, MPAFF, MA, The Medical Institute, Austin, Texas

Reviewers

Lisa Beck, Colorado Springs, Colorado

Reed Bell, M.D., Pensacola, Florida

Kate Hendricks, M.D., M.P.H., Austin, Texas

Gaylen M. Kelton, M.D., Indianapolis, Indiana

David Roper, San Antonio, Texas

Brooke Spencer, San Antonio, Texas

Lynne Tingle, Ph.D., Charlotte, North Carolina

The Medical Institute
for Sexual Health

The Medical Institute for Sexual Health is a nonprofit organization committed to the health, hope, and happiness of all people. We have discovered that one of the greatest risks to an individual experiencing these things is being involved in sexual activity outside of marriage. Science clearly shows that unmarried youth who become sexually involved are at great risk of long-term consequences including nonmarital pregnancy and sexually transmitted infections.

Considered a leader in communicating about youth risk-behavior issues, The Medical Institute provides individuals and community organizations with resources for purchase that help initiate conversation with young people and parents. Currently The Medical Institute distributes almost one hundred thousand pieces of material each year to individuals and organizations across the United States and throughout the world.

Leaders at the Centers for Disease Control, the U.S. Health and Human Services Department, the White House, and state-level government offices, as well as educators and parents across the nation, seek out advice from The Medical Institute about sexual issues affecting our nations teens.

With a national advisory board of medical doctors, counselors and psychologists, educators (including abstinence leaders), and parents, The Medical Institute for Sexual Health is based at P.O. Box 162306, Austin, TX 78716-2306. To order resources, call 512-328-6268 weekdays, 8 a.m. to 5 p.m. (Central Standard Time).

You can also reach The Medical Institute by email at medinstitute@medinstitute.org or on the Web at www.medinstitute.org/contact/contact.htm. The Washington DC office is at 3250 Prospect St. N.W., Washington, DC 20007; the phone number is 202-342-7444.

Editor

Melissa Cox is vice president of Cox Creative, Inc., a full-service marketing and advertising firm in Denver. Previously she served The Medical Institute for Sexual Health as director of marketing and public relations, developing and producing acclaimed resources such as the cutting-edge videos Sex Is Not a Game and Just Thought You Oughta Know, which won a Telly Award for finest work in film and video on cable television.

She was editor of Focus on the Familys Physician magazine and managing editor of the best-selling Complete Book of Baby & Child Care.

Shes been married for fifteen years to Alan, her high school sweetheart whom she first met in church when they were twelve; they have two young sons, Logan and Keegan, and a yellow Lab named Stormy.

Contributors

J. Thomas Fitch, M.D., is a pediatrician in San Antonio, Texas. Hes especially interested in helping the parents of his adolescent patients understand how they can help their children avoid involvement in risk-taking activities like alcohol and drug use, as well as nonmarital sexual activity. Hes become a national expert on condom effectiveness and was one of the expert panel members for the National Institutes of Health Condom Effectiveness Panel. As past president of the Texas Pediatric Society, hes given numerous professional presentations to colleagues and has been published in a variety of periodicals. He is a clinical professor in the department of pediatrics at the University of Texas Health Sciences Center in San Antonio, Texas. He was a content editor for Focus on the Familys Complete Book of Baby & Child Care and is a member of Focus on the Familys Physician Resource Council, as well as the chairman of the Medical Institutes board of directors.

Patricia Francis, M.D., a pediatrician in Lafayette, California, has been in private practice since 1985. As the mother of two daughters, shes focused on issues impacting young women, including eating disorders and sexually transmitted diseases. Dr. Francis volunteers for a number of organizations in the Bay Area. Shes a member of a variety of professional medical organizations and was a content editor for Focus on the Familys