Reb Bradley - Child Training Tips: What I Wish I knew When My Children Were Young

CHILD
TRAINING
TIPS

WHAT I WISH I KNEW WHEN MY CHILDREN WERE YOUNG

REB BRADLEY

NEW AND UPDATED VERSION

CHILD TRAINING TIPS

Copyright 1995, 1996, 1998, 2002, 2003, 2005, 2014 by Reb Bradley

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced, copied, or distributed in any form or by any means without permission in writing from the publisher, except by a reviewer, who may quote brief passages in a review.

Published by WND Books, Washington, D.C. WND Books is a registered trademark of WorldNetDaily.com, Inc. (WND)

Book designed by Mark Karis

WND Books, Inc., also publishes books in print formats.

WND Books are distributed to the trade by:
Midpoint Trade Books, 27 West 20th Street, Suite 1102, New York, New York 10011

WND Books are available at special discounts for bulk purchases. For more information call (541) 474-1776 or visit www.wndbooks.com.

Paperback ISBN: 978-1-938067-00-6
eBook ISBN: 978-1-938067-01-3

Library of Congress Catalog-in-Publication Data

To my wife, Beverly, and the gifts God has given me: Nathanael, Anna, Benjamin, Leah, Michael, and Emily Claire

I thank the Lord for my wife, Beverly, who was my partner in childrearing. As a fulltime mother, she not only spent more time training our children than I, but she gave many hours reviewing and suggesting edits on the rough draft manuscripts for this book.

I also thank the Lord for my children who endured my limited fatherhood during writing seasons.

I am thankful for Rick Fugate, whom I consider my mentor. It was his book and video series, What the Bible Says About Child Training, that God used to lay the foundation for biblically based child training I so desperately needed for my family. Without his teaching, I dread to think of where my children would be. This book would never have been written.

I am thankful for the parents of Hope Chapel Sacramento who, year after year, sat through Rick Fugates video series with me and gave their input in the many discussions that followed.

I especially thank the Lord for giving us His Word, our only reliable source of Truth.

Many years ago, when the first few of our six children were born, we were hoping they would come with an owners manual. They didnt, so our first ones were the experiments we did the best we could with what we knew and we didnt know all that much.

I am definitely not a parent who did everything right I am actually jealous of people like that. In my journey through rearing our children, I fell into many holes along the way. My aim with this book is to show other parents the locations of the holes and how to get out if they fall in, hence the subtitle, What I Wish I Knew When My Children Were Young.

This book does not have all the answers on child training. It does however, contain answers to many of the questions I had when my oldest children were young. Those looking for an exhaustive manual, balanced in all facets of rearing children, will not find it here. The purpose of this book is simply to expose to parents their possible blind spots, and to offer practical tips and biblically based help in overcoming them. This book has been written primarily for parents of children under twelve years of age, although parents of teens will find valuable help here as well.

Although I have updated this book over the years to present a more complete study on biblical parenting, I recommend the audio or video presentation of my seminar, Biblical Insights Into Child Training. The seminar covers many of the same topics as this book, but includes stories and illustrations that help humanize the parenting process.

I have published this book in an outline form with many symptom and behavior lists, because I meant it to be a quick-reference manual and supplement for those who have heard the seminar. The reader will notice that a number of points are repeated in different sections. This is because each point is pertinent to its context, and because I didnt want parents to have to reread the entire book to get a complete answer every time they needed help in one area.

A key danger to writing a parenting book consisting primarily of lists of symptoms and cures is that some parents may develop a cookie-cutter approach to raising their children. They may lean toward formulaic thinking and relate to each of their children exactly the same. That is the last thing I would desire. I want all parents to be thinkers who apply the recommended principles to each of their individual children, taking into account each childs natural disposition and personality. In fact, I am so concerned about the possibility of promoting cookie-cutter thinking that in this edition of the book, I have gone through the entire manuscript and attempted to correct all wording that might promote it.

After receiving overwhelming response to the first editions of this book, I am excited to publish this Millennial Edition. Multitudes of parents have written and told us of how their children radically changed when they began implementing the insights they gained. We are grateful to God for that. Yet, despite the positive response, I have decided to offer a caution to a certain type of parent before they begin reading.

So to those of you who might consider yourselves to be intense parents who run your homes like drill sergeants, I offer the following caution: Be forewarned! As you read the pages that follow, you will gain new insights into your childrens motives and behaviors, and you may find your usual anger and intolerance growing in intensity the more you read. If that is you, then go slow in implementation! Watch your frustration. Anger is not your friend it is a detriment to effective parenting. Love not terror will be your childrens greatest motivator.

Keep in mind that our young children are mostly a product of our training, whether by intent or neglect. They are only the way they are because we have not yet finished their training. If the children are not learning fast enough, and the training does not seem to be working, then it is time to look for blind spots in our approach, and not time for greater harshness. Keep in mind Gods Word to us through James, the anger of man does not accomplish the righteousness of God. Children respond best to alert, loving, consistent discipline not to angry, dont mess with me, kid, parenting.

May all parents who read this seek God for the insight, self-discipline, and consistency they need to successfully train the next generation to be mature, responsible followers of Christ. Amen.

Reb Bradley

Children today are tyrants. They contradict their parents, they gobble their food, they terrorize their teachers.
Socrates, 426 BC

The job of parenting has always been a difficult one, but those who have lived in America for the last fifty years have watched it become even more so. Our children are immersed in a culture that panders to hedonism and are among playmates that have been raised as narcissists. As parents, we are less confident than our predecessors in our knowledge of raising families. With the experts offering contradictory advice and the lack of a cohesive, biblical consensus within the Church, Christian parents have found themselves feeling helpless and frustrated with their children. For many of them, parenting has become such a source of frustration that they do everything within their power to prevent the conception of any more problems. Their stress is so great that they count the days until their children are old enough to go to school or move out on their own. They look forward to summertime and holiday vacations, but dread the thought of being with their children all day long.