ADVANCE PRAISE FOR
Raising Can-Do Kids
Bringing together the latest research on child development with real-world examples, this unique and authoritative book couldnt be more timely. It offers parents an engaging road map for raising kids who will be primed to both define and pursue their successes in the exciting and complex future that awaits them.
Michele Borba, EdD, parenting expert, educational psychologist, and author of The Big Book of Parenting Solutions and Building Moral Intelligence
This book offers a powerful framework.... Parents will want to put the research-based suggestions to use immediately to help foster can-do kids who are able to handle the inevitable challenges theyll face in the twenty-first century.
Denise Pope, PhD, senior lecturer at Stanford Graduate School of Education and cofounder of Challenge Success
Richard Rende and Jen Prosek masterfully weave together developmental science, expert opinion, and practical examples to build a solid and engaging case that we must shift our parenting focus if we are to raise a generation of children prepared to lead us into the future. This book is written for parents, but is a gift to this generation of children.
Kenneth R. Ginsburg, MD, MSEd, professor of pediatrics at the Childrens Hospital of Philadelphia, University of Pennsylvania, and author of Building Resilience in Children and Teens and Raising Kids to Thrive
The premise of this bookthat parents can help their kids develop the entrepreneurial mindset they need to be successfulresonated deeply with me. This is a must-read for parents.
Kevin Ryan, chairman and founder of Gilt, MongoDB, Business Insider, and Zola
Our children will live in a world in which entrepreneurial individuals who can take risks and lead others amid uncertainty will capture outsized returns. This is a guide to help you raise children who will excel in that world.
Kyle Jensen, PhD, Yale School of Management
PERIGEE
An imprint of Penguin Random House LLC
375 Hudson Street, New York, New York 10014
RAISING CAN-DO KIDS
Copyright 2015 by Richard Rende, PhD, and Jen Prosek
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ISBN: 978-0-698-15303-5
This book has been registered with the Library of Congress.
First edition: August 2015
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Cover design by Kaitlin Kall
Version_1
RICHARD:
For Cheryl, Iliana, and Carlo (RIP)
JEN:
To my parents,
who shaped the entrepreneur in me
To my husband,
who enabled my entrepreneurial success through our partnership
To my daughter,
who drove this quest, which became this book
And to Dan Jacobs, my original partner in business,
who is the reason I became an accidental entrepreneur
CONTENTS
INTRODUCTION
Before we launch you into this book, we think it would be helpful to tell you a little about how it came about. In 2012, one of usJen, a successful entrepreneurcontacted the other of usRichard, a child development researcherto explore partnering on a book. Our conversation, however, quickly turned into a discussion of the uncertainty we were both feeling as parents. While we all want to raise our kids to be successfulis there a more ubiquitous phrase these days when it comes to kids?both personally and professionally, its just not clear how we should do that, because the world our kids will enter someday is becoming increasingly unpredictable.
We talked about some of the basic concerns we keep hearing about. Kids can have the most outstanding academic and extracurricular profile imaginable and still get rejected by a lot of colleges, as the number of applicants keeps growing while the number of available slots doesnt change much. They can have an Ivy League degree and not get the job they want, and a college degree certainly doesnt guarantee immediate employment. If they do manage to land that job, they might find that its either going to morph in unpredictable ways, or that it may even disappear. If the social scientists are right, we are fast becoming a nation of free agents who bear full responsibility for engineering our careers and our lives. The availability of good jobs and fulfilling careers wont be a given for the rising generation. Many of todays most prestigious companies and professions wont even exist. How do we prepare our kids for that?
Jen related that, given present-day conditions, she wanted her daughter to learn throughout childhood the skills she would need to successfully navigate the worlds unpredictability. It seemed less important that her daughter know about a specific field or notch a specific credential; rather, she needed to build skills such as adapting, improvising, learning, persevering, and spotting opportunities. We agreed that the old paradigms of parenting for success are becoming increasingly obsolete. If we want our kids to thrive in that unpredictable world that awaits them as adults, we cant just hyperfocus on pushing them as hard as possible through the predictable path of schoolwork, exams, and extracurricular activities. There has to be something more we can do to prepare them for a future that we cant entirely envision.
Jen suspected that raising kids to become more like entrepreneurs would help. Entrepreneurs typically make their way in the world with no road map to guide them; they must motivate and inspire themselves, applying their passion and creativity to create success for themselves and value for others. People had often asked Jen if her parents had done anything special in raising her and her brother, since both had gone on to work for themselves (Jen as the founder and CEO of an international communications business, her brother as an independent artist and writer). The more Jen thought about it, the more she realized that she and her brother had been encouraged at home to do things like explore, be creative, be optimistic, seek out opportunities, make their own choices, and know how to get along with others. Jen realized that the very skills and outlook she experienced as a child were exactly the strengths she brought to her business