Zig Ziglar - Raising Positive Kids in a Negative World

RAISING POSITIVE KIDS IN A NEGATIVE WORLD

1985 by Zig Ziglar

Revised edition published in 2002.

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Scripture quotations are from The New King James Version. 1979, 1980, 1982, 1990, 1994 by Thomas Nelson, Inc.

Library of Congress Catalog Card Number: 96-96657

ISBN 978-0-7852-6478-1

Printed in the United States of America

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DEDICATION

To the four most positive kids Ive ever known:

JEAN SUZANNE ZIGLAR WITMEYER

CINDY ANN ZIGLAR OATES

JULIE ANN ZIGLAR NORMAN

JOHN THOMAS ZIGLAR

CONTENTS

T he story is told that in the days of yesteryear a bitter farmer, whose beautiful wheat crop had just been completely destroyed by a hailstorm, lamented that if he could just control the weather for one year, he would raise such a big crop and make so much money he could retire. If God would just grant him the power to let the sun shine when he wanted it, let the snow fall at the appropriate time, let him completely control the rainfall, the dew, the frost, and the temperature, he would have the bumper crop of all time.

As you probably already suspect, the wish was granted, and the farmer was given the privilege of letting that rain fall when and where and at the rate he wanted it to fall. He was given complete control of the snow, the temperature, and the spring thaw. He was given the privilege of turning the sun on and off at his pleasure and setting it at exactly the temperature he wanted. Result: a total disaster. The worst crop the man ever had. When it was all over, a neighbor asked what happened, and the farmer said, I forgot to let the wind blow. (For the uninitiated, that means no cross-pollination.)

In a way, thats an ideal lead-in for Raising Positive Kids in a Negative World. I believe it is possible, with all the information we have at our disposal, to have every answer to every question, to know exactly what to do under all circumstances, and still end up with a crop failure as far as our children are concerned. The reason is very simple: Children are human beings and not crops or computers.

However, despite the apparent gloom of the opening story, let me hasten to add that Im convinced there are definite steps we can take to put the odds in our favor. The more solid, sensible, common-sense, loving steps we take, the greater the chances of helping our children become the kind of children we want them to be and wish we had been when we were growing up.

For those of you who know me already, you are aware that I am an optimist. My choice to be positive and optimistic is not made blindly or irrationally. Its my belief that the very creative center of all nature and all life is positive, optimistic, and hopeful. Thats why Im truly an optimist when it comes to our kids, because they are our only hope for Americas future, just as we, the parents, are their only hope for their present and immediate future. Unfortunately, too many parents still havent learned that an optimistic outlook on life is a result of a choice we all must make. We choose our basic attitudes about life and in the process help choose our childrens attitudes. Im convinced that the best and maybe the only way to raise positive kids is to start by becoming a positive parent. For that reason, I will devote a substantial part of this book to showing you, the parent, how to become a winner in life.

YOUR UNASKED QUESTIONS

In answer to your unasked questions, no, my wife and I did not do all the things Im suggesting when we were raising our three daughters and our son. (Anyone can tell it like it is. I want to tell it like it should be.) We did follow most of the principles mentioned in this book and were, we feel, successful in raising four happy, healthy, productive, well-adjusted, morally sound, positive kids. If I did not firmly believe the validity of that last statement, you can rest assured this book would never have been writtenat least, not by me.

W hen the proud new mama and daddy hold their seven-pound bundle of joy in their arms, its difficult to imagine that someday that little package of helplessness could be a six-foot, two-hundred-pounder or a five-foot beauty who will make major contributions to the world.

Positive parents, however, have the capacity to see the future, to use their imaginations, to visualize that baby growing up to be a successful, creative, positive adult. Just as Michelangelo saw the mighty Moses in that block of granite before he struck the first blow, so we parents (1) can confidently project an image of the fine young man or young woman who will emerge from that tiny block of humanity and (2) can nurture that helpless babe through successive growing stages into positive adulthood. Of course, the nurturing process is not exactly a piece of cake. Remember, a well-baked cake consists of various ingredients subjected to just the right amount of blending and heat for the proper length of time. The result? A finished delicacy. To raise positive kids weve got to use many essential ingredientslove, discipline, forgiveness, and many other qualities all wrapped in an abundance of care and commitment for our childrens eventual well-being. Raising positive kids is not an easy trip by any stretch of the imagination, but it can be fun, exciting, and tremendously rewarding. So buckle your seat belt, because whether you have old kids or young uns, there is some exciting information in the pages ahead.

ONE
Raising Positive Kids Is SimpleBut Not Easy

NEW GLASSES FOR A CHALLENGING OPPORTUNITY

S everal years ago I went to see my optometrist friend, Bob Vodvarka, to be examined for some bifocals. Bob took advantage of modern technology in the form of his computer and was able to write the ideal prescription for my glasses. Ten days later he fitted me with the glasses, pronounced me ready to see everything I needed to see, and bade me farewell.

My car was parked about fifty feet from the door of his office. As I walked out with those new bifocals, I picked my feet up extremely high. I was unaware of this until I got to the curb next to my car and saw the reflection in the window. My foot was up in the air about two feet. I quickly looked around to see if anybody was watching. (You know how you feel when you do something that is not overly bright!) When I saw that nobody was looking, I laughed, thinking how ridiculous I must have looked.

Then a sobering thought hit me. I, too, am an optometrist. I travel our country on a regular basis, fitting people with a very special custom-made pair of glassesnot rose-colored glasses, neither are they woes-colored. But these glasses are unique in that they magnify your potential as a parent. These glasses do even more than thatthey turn outward to help you see the love, hope, intelligence, personality, genius, integrity, and all the other positive qualities that your child possesses. In other words, these glasses will help you see the tremendous potential represented in your child. Thats where this book beginsby urging you parents to look again and see what that special child of yours can be in the future. This will also help you to look at yourself and your opportunity to help your child develop and reach his/her potential.