Dunn Gaby - Please Send Help

The author and publisher have provided this e-book to you for your personal use only. You may not make this e-book publicly available in any way. Copyright infringement is against the law. If you believe the copy of this e-book you are reading infringes on the authors copyright, please notify the publisher at: us.macmillanusa.com/piracy. TO EACH OTHER. LOVE YOU. Sun, Sep 8, 5:42 PM EST Were officially back in the same time zone! But were over a thousand miles apart Why do you always see the negative?! Because of my brain.

And how it works. Ah right. How could I forget? Text me when you get to your apartment. You mean the youth hostel? GEN JK. I got an apartment! Thank god. apartment and did not find a single bug, bug dropping or cobweb. apartment and did not find a single bug, bug dropping or cobweb.

Is it possible that I am the exception to the rule? Will I somehow survive my early twenties without finding la cucaracha in my bed? I better be. I might have beaten out hundreds of kids for this internship but I will pack up and go home to Cali the moment I feel something crawling on me. Remember that time junior year of high school when that spider fell on my head during the only time I made out in high school???? And then you called me a Bug Queen while I cried? I think I finally have enough time and perspective to find that hilarious now. (Memories Makes me feel fine! FYI that was to the tune of Summer breeze Makes me feel fine.) My roomie/co-intern still isnt here even though we both start at 7AM tomorrow. I took the bigger room at first, but then felt bad and moved into the smaller one. Why do I do this to myself? Unclear, my dear friend, unclear! I cant believe Im officially an adult.

I mean I have zero income and no social life to speak of but I officially go to work now instead of school. Did you ever think wed make it this far when we were fourteen and I was still figuring out how to properly shave my armpit hair without cutting myself? I sure didnt! We dont even live on the West Coast anymore! Life is crazy! (I know you havent really lived on the West Coast for four years, but Ive always been a late bloomer.) At this rate I should have a husband and kids by forty-five! Anything is possible! Speaking of the impossible becoming possible Mind the Gap with Halona McBride!! I get to work on Mind the Gap with Halona McBride!! The greatest show on television! The only prime-time late-night show on television with a female host! But I dont have to tell you that. Because I already told you all summer long. (Thank you again for coming back to L.A. to pretty much exclusively hang out with me. I needed one last summer with my BFF.

Plus youd outgrown Boston/Emerson anyway. I like to think I outgrew USC after my third semester) Wow. Im sweating. What do you think Halona McBride smells like? Will I get close enough to smell her? My thoughts are spinning! I know its only 8PM but I want to go to bed. I guess I have to wait for Dana to get here so she doesnt think Im a freak who goes to bed at 8PM regularly. (I only do it on school nights.) TELL ME ABOUT YOUR APARTMENT! IS IT INSIDE A SWAMP?! Xoxoxooxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox Ava *Oldest, Favorite, Most Queer, Loudest Friend Re: COCKROACH, BEDBUGS, AND FLEAS OH MY

Gen Goldman

9/8/19

to Ava Hi!! Sorry to reply so late.

I hope youre asleep by now since its well past 9PM. My apartment is infested with alligators and mosquitos. Ive made them my pets. I named one after you. Shes very pretty Turns out Florida is HOT! And not in a good way. My pits have been dripping since we touched down.

I cant tell if not shaving them has made it better or worse. (The smell is definitely worse.) Turns out, my apartment is right by the airport. So I can escape at the drop of a hat if it turns out journalism isnt for me. JUST KIDDING! I am clearly following my dream of upholding the fourth estate by writing for a failing Southern newspaper. The Fernandina Beach Centennial will rise from its grave on my hardworking back! Or Ill quit and start blogging my diet like most of my former classmates. And your grandma thought I wouldnt amount to anything! My studio apartment is surprisingly big for $650 a month, but I guess thats the cost of no living.

I dont have any furniture, so Im gonna sleep on the floor tonight and figure out my interior design vision tomorrow. Im thinking tacky yet beachy. Okay, ta ta for now. I have one hundred hours of Forensic Files to catch up on. TITS & ASS Gen Mon, Sep 9, 5:30 AM FIRST DAY OF WORK! DANA IS A BOY!