Rueter - 185 Stupid Things Republicans Have Said

Stupid Things

Republicans

Have Said

185 Stupid Things Republicans Have Said copyright 2008 by Ted Rueter. All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission except in the case of reprints in the context of reviews. For information, write Andrews McMeel Publishing, LLC, an Andrews McMeel Universal company, 1130 Walnut Street, Kansas City, Missouri 64106.

E-ISBN:978-1-4494-0943-2

Library of Congress Control Number:
2007935540

www.andrewsmcmeel.com

Accounting Procedures

In the corporate world, sometimes things arent exactly black and white when it comes to accounting procedures.

George W. Bush (president, 2001),
defending actions taken by Harken
Energy while he was a board
member

Admiration

I admired Hitler, for instance, because he came from being a little man with almost no formal education up to power.

Arnold Schwarzenegger (governor of
California, 2003), in a 1975
interview during the filming of the
documentary Pumping Iron

Africa

We spent a lot of time talking about Africa, as we should. Africa is a nation that suffers from incredible disease.

George W. Bush (president, 2001)

Aggression

Desert Storm was a stirring victory for the forces of aggression and lawlessness.

Dan Quayle (vice president,
198993)

AIDS

Were concerned about AIDS inside our White Houseno mistake about it.

George W. Bush (president, 2001)

Anecdotes

A tax cut is really one of the anecdotes to coming out of an economic illness.

George W. Bush (president, 2001),
during the 2000 presidential
campaign

Arrogance

Its not your job to stop me for speeding.

Darrell Issa (representative from
California, 2001), to a Border Patrol
police officer who stopped him for
driving 90 miles per hour through
an interstate construction zone

Average People

Take the average person, who makes $100,000 a year

Nelson Rockefeller (governor of New
York, 19591973), beginning a
lengthy discussion of economic
policy

Beliefs

The reason I believe in a large tax cut is because its what I believe.

George W. Bush (president, 2001)

Osama bin Laden

[Osama bin Laden] is either alive and well, or alive and not well, or not alive.

Donald Rumseld (U.S. secretary of
defense, 200106)

Blacks

Im not against the blacks, and a lot of the good blacks will attest to that.

Evan Mecham (governor of Arizona,
19871988)

Books

One of the great things about books is sometimes there are some fantastic pictures.

George W. Bush (president, 2001)

Borders

Border relations between Canada and Mexico have never been better.

George W. Bush (president, 2001),
in a press conference with the
Canadian prime minister

Boston

If I were a Democrat, I suspect Id feel a heck of a lot more comfortable in Boston than, say, America.

Dick Armey (representative from
Texas, 19852002)

Branches of Government

There are four departments. Theres the executive, and the legislative, and the judicialand the Bill of Rights.

Kenneth S. Wherry (senator from
Nebraska, 194351)

Briefings

Whenever presidents say they read it, you can read that to be he was briefed.

Ari Fleischer (White House press
secretary, 200103), conceding that
President Bush did not actually
read a 268-page report by the
Environmental Protection Agency on
global warming

Budgets

Its clearly a budget. It has a lot of numbers in it.

George W. Bush (president, 2001)

George W. Bush

The first time I met Bush 43, I knew he was different. Two things became clear: One, he didnt know very much. The other was he had the confidence to ask questions that revealed he didnt know very much.

Richard Perle (chairman, Defense
Policy Board, 20012003)

If George W. Bush is a reformer, Im an astronaut.

John McCain (senator from Arizona,
1987), during the 2000
presidential campaign

Campaign Platform

Dont worry about that.

Arnold Schwarzenegger (governor of
California, 2003), detailing his
stance on environmental protection
while campaigning

Reining in government and all that other stuff.

Bob Dole (1996 Republican
presidential nominee), outlining his
presidential campaign platform

Campaign Staffers

Thats what happens when you get your staff from prison work-release programs.

John McCain (senator from Arizona,
1987), observing a food fight
during the 2000 South Carolina
Republican primary

Celebrity

The nice thing about being a celebrity is that when you bore people, they think its their fault.

Henry Kissinger (secretary of state,
197377)

Centuries

Thats a chapter, the last chapter of the twentieth twentieth the twenty-first century that most of us would rather forget. The last chapter of the twentieth century. This is the first chapter of the twenty-first century.