Roy English - Advice From a Country Farmer
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- Book:Advice From a Country Farmer
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- Publisher:Gibbs Smith
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- Year:2011
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Dishing out witty one-liners and old-fashioned country logic the same way an old camp cook dishes out beans and biscuits, Roy Englishs Advice from a Country Farmer is simply thisno-nonsense humor and wisdom from a country gentleman schooled in common sense and kindness.
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Advice from a Country Farmer
Digital Edition 1.0
Text 2011 Roy English
Photographs 2011 photographer
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced by any means whatsoever without written permission from the publisher, except brief portions quoted for purpose of review.
Gibbs Smith
P.O. Box 667
Layton, Utah 84041
Orders: 1.800.835.4993
www.gibbs-smith.com
ISBN: 978-1-4236-1861-4
Dont argue just for the hell of it.
To a farmer, retire is something you do to a tractor.
Horsepower is no substitute for horse sense.
Most farmers work only half a day; the other twelve hours they do other stuff.
Farmers believe in miracles. They see them every day.
Life is simpler when you plow around the stumps.
Mamas, dont let your cowboys grow up to be babies.
You can shear a sheep every year. You can butcher him only once.
The only farmers who sleep late are in the cemetery.
A fella who brags about his own humility will lie about anything.
Meanness dont happen overnight.
Dont judge a farmer by the size of his tractor.
Forgive your enemies. It messes with their heads.
Old farmers never die. Their lug nuts just get rusty.
It dont take a very big man to carry a grudge.
You cant unsay a cruel thing.
Nobody works harder than a farmer, except maybe a farmers wife.
Every path has some puddles.
A rooster that crows at midnight wont make it past Sunday.
Farmers know stuff that aint wrote down nowhere.
When you wallow with pigs, expect to get dirty.
The best sermons are lived, not preached.
A lazy fella is about as helpful as the o in opossum.
Most of the stuff folks worry about never happens.
Farming is Gods work, sure as preaching.
A farm dog knows when to bark when to bite, and when to stay under the porch.
Its better to dig a pond in a valley than on a hilltop.
A rooster is a magician. He can turn an egg into a chicken.
A tractor is just a mule with tires, but it costs more to feed.
Anyone who wants to live happily ever after had best tend to it daily.
Dont work for an outfit you dont believe in.
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