Table of Contents
This book is dedicated to
my amazing, loving family and to all the
wonderful people who literally saved my life.
I am also so grateful for the encouragement of
all those who made this book possible, especially
my agent, Sharlene Martin, my editor,
Ben Schafer, and everyone at Da Capo Press.
I thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Foreword
By Hank Williams, Jr.
Every time I look at my daughter Hilary, I see a miracle. I realize every day is a blessing now, more than ever, because she remains with us.
You see, I almost lost my oldest daughter to a car accident in March 2006. For a few precious seconds, we all lost her. Her heart stopped, a result of her blood pressure bottoming out after a one-car accident involving Hilary and her sister, Holly. I wont go into the details; youll find all that and more in this brave, beautifully written book.
Heres what Ill never forget about that day: Shortly after arriving at the Memphis hospital, I heard the words, Well know in the next hour if shes going to make it. I hear those words like it was yesterday. They still bring me to my knees.
Today, as I write this, Im enjoying my favorite kind of day. Im at my cabin at Kentucky Lake. My two youngest, Katie and Sam, both pulled in a boatload of croppie fish today. The sun was shining, the fish were biting, my kids were smiling. Let me tell you, it dont get much better than that for ol Bocephus.
While here, my daughter Holly called, talking about finishing a two-month concert tour that took her to Europe, where I know they fell in love with her, just as everybody does. Hilary called to talk about finishing her book, about her photo shoot for the cover, about her songwriting and recording sessions. I cant wait to hear her new songs. The world better watch out: Hilary may be the quietest and most reserved of my children, but she can also be the most willful and determined. Nothing stops her once shes set her mind to something. She sings like a queen, like a star. My friend Bobby (I never call him Kid Rock, but he doesnt mind if you do) once said, Man, shes got the bellows! Aint that the truth. Good God Almighty, shes got one powerful voice. Just wait until you hear her.
Heres the thing: Hilary is the strongest person Ive ever known. People think her Daddy is tough? No, nothing like my daughter. Ive had my own miracle and recovery from an accident that should have killed me. But what my daughter has faced, what shes endured and overcome and conquered, well... just read this book. Youll see it. Her strength will amaze you and inspire you, as it has all of us who love her.
That strength comes from her faith. Not many people realize how important my faith is to me. It is, and its been confirmed in the last few years when my prayers to save my beautiful daughter were answered. My prayers joined those of her mother, Becky, sister, Holly, and thousands of others, and I know for certain that is among the reasons Hilary still walks this eartha bit shaky at times, perhaps, but she gets stronger every day. Like I said, shes one determined young woman. There were those who wondered if shed ever walk again without a cane. But those of us who know her best always knew she would.
Many of you will know I faced a similar trial at about the same age Hilary has gone through hers. I was twenty-six when I fell five hundred feet down Ajax Mountain in Montana. I underwent thirteen surgeries, or something around there, to build back my face and, well, to save my life. It was touch-and-go there for a while.
Hilary has gone through much more. Shes had, what, twenty-three, twenty-four surgeries now? I lose count. Some of them were excruciatingly painful. As bad as its all been, it was the first day, then the first week, then the first month, then the first several months that stand out. It was bad news on top of bad news. My girl was broken apart, and on top of that, shes diabetic, so there were constant concerns with her blood sugar and with her ability to heal properly. My God, what she went through.
People think once the nurses revived her on the Life Flight helicopter, once she reached the hospital and had expert doctors and specialists caring for her, that she was past the death-defying part. No sir, not even close. Hilary nearly died on us over and over. Each day seemed to bring a new ordeal, as she went from one traumatic surgery to the next. I tell you, we prayed like weve never prayed before, all of us. And here she is, as beautiful and as full of life as ever.
One moment always stands out. She was lying in her hospital bed, so badly injured she couldnt speak. She motioned me over and moved her hands as if playing a fiddle. It took me a few minutes to figure out what she wanted, until she wrote down on a pad, Mr. Weatherman, the title of one of my songs. She was asking me to sing for her. Ive never sang anything with as much feeling as I did that song.
Today, Hilary is the calmest, most together, most spiritual person I know. Im the proudest papa on earth, thats for damn sure. I know more than ever that the trivial parts of life dont mean a thing. Its a smile from your child. Its a call or a text in the middle of the day. Its hearing someone say Daddy in the sweetest tone imaginable.
Let me tell you one more thing: My daughters were spared for a reason. They have been given more time on earth because God has plans for them. I felt the same thing when I didnt die at age twenty-six: God had something for me to do, and Ive spent every year since then fulfilling that destiny. With this book, Hilary begins to fulfill hers. Its only the beginning....
Chapter 1
Mississippi Road
As far as the weather goes, the middle of March in Tennessee can go either way. It might be gray, gloomy, and wet, like it had been for weeks, or it could be warm, sunny, and bright green. That particular Wednesday it was perfect: seventy degrees and sunny.
Two days earlier, our moms father, Warren White, or Papaw, as we called him, had died at age eighty-six. So my sister, Holly, and I were on our way from Nashville to his funeral in Mer Rouge, Louisiana.
Its tough to put into words just how much Papaw meant to us. The best memories of our lifemine and Hollyswere at Papaw and Grannys beautiful, grand old farmhouse in Mer Rouge, where Mom grew up. We spent lots of traditional Southern holidays there with tables full of food and lots of people and kids running around everywhere. At Christmastime, Papaw would put up the tallest Christmas tree you could imagine, then he would pass out presents to all the grandchildren and cousins and second cousins. In the fall, hed give us a dollar for picking pecans, and wed run outside and pick up as many as we could from the ground and put them in little bags.
Every time we visited, wed go riding in Papaws gold Jeep Cherokee down these country roads. He had that car forever. It must have had 300,000 miles on it. When I was really little, he would sit me in his lap and let me steer while he pressed down on the pedals with his feet.
Then wed drive the three miles from his house past the cotton fields and head downtown. He would walk into the diner wearing his cowboy hat and boots, and he would talk to every single person while I tried to hide behind him, clinging to his leg.
Papaw was a hardworking farmer for most of his life. He also fought in World War IIhe was based in Okinawaand although he hardly ever talked about it, a few years ago, Holly asked him what it was like. All he said was that he saw things a man should never have to see.