Grove Press
New York
Copyright 2014 by Asa Akira
Jacket design and artwork (c) David Choe Author photograph by Van Style
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Published simultaneously in Canada
Printed in the United States of America
ISBN: 978-0-8021-2259-9
eBook ISBN: 978-0-8021-9259-2
Grove Press
an imprint of Grove/Atlantic, Inc.
154 West 14th Street
New York, NY 10011
Distributed by Publishers Group West
www.groveatlantic.com
To my parents. But please dont read it.
Contents
Authors Note
I started this book hoping to shed a different light on the industry I love so much. Not to say every day is sunshine and flowers, but I dont feel a healthy, honest voice of someone currently looking from the inside out has been heard.
While writing, the book morphed into something more. Ive always questioned why I am the way I am. I had a normal upbringing. My parents are loving, kind, and present. I have no mental disorders. Why am I so sexual? Why do I insist on publicizing my most intimate moments?
I cant say that Ive found an answerbut writing this book has oddly brought me to peace with myself. At the end of the day, I do feel my sexual cravings as a woman are normal, and should be accepted as such by society. Its bullshit that a man who fucks a thousand women is considered a badass, while a woman doing the same thing is shunned. Im not ashamed that Ive worked at an S&M dungeon, stripped, escorted, or that I currently have sex for money every day. On the contrary, Im proud of myself for having the guts to indulge in my desires.
The world has seen every fold of my most private body parts, and yet, I feel this book is my most exposing venture yet. I hope you enjoy.
P.S. Some (but not all) of the names I use in the book have been changed.
The Perfect Scene
Rolling and... action.
Bobby was going down on Monica. I stood behind the camera, watching. Narrowing his eyes at me, Bobby buried his face in Monicas pussy as he took his cock out to stroke. It was growing harder by the second, and my pussy grew wetter in unison, as if the two were synced. I watched Monica arch her back every time Bobby sucked on her clit and brought her closer to orgasm.
Come on, fucking come, I mentally whispered. It would be my cue to join them.
I was playing a hooker today. Bobby and Monica were playing a curious couple who hired me. Theres something oddly self-referential about playing a hooker in a pornoI was getting paid to portray a woman who got paid to have sex. And also, of course, to have sex. Its like a Russian dolls of sex workers.
As Monicas body twitched, I walked in front of the camera and cupped my hand over her mouth. I gave her one last chance to gasp for air before clamping down on her face, and rubbed her clit hard as Bobby stuck his dick in her. No matter how aggressively she turned and twisted, I wouldnt let her go, and I wouldnt stop rubbing. She continued orgasming for another ten seconds, her muffled screams occasionally escaping through the cracks in my fingers, until I let her free to breathe. As she came down from the intensity, I kissed my way up from her knee to her toes, which curled when Bobby hit a good spot with his cock.
Bobbys cock is great for porn. Big, straight, all one color. It was shiny from the juice coming out of Monicas pussy, making it look as if Monica was giving birth to it. I dived down to suck the slime off, and as I put it back inside her pussy, I spit on my finger and slid it slowly into her asshole. She yelled for more and I stuck another one in. I watched Bobbys dick go in and out of her pussy as I slid my fingers in and out of her ass. I could feel the camera over my shoulder, catching a close-up of the mesmerizing motion.
We made her come again, and I pushed Bobby out of the frame as I climbed on top of Monica to kiss her, then farther up her body until my pussy was on her face. She quickly took my cue to eat me out until I came, collapsing onto my back. Aware of the camera closing in on my face, I eye-fucked Bobbys cock and licked my lips. It wasnt hard to portrayI needed dick. I enjoy getting my pussy eaten as much as the next girl, but when theres a cock in the picture, it feels kind of like going to a steak house and ordering the fish.
Like cock-hungry animals, Monica and I took turns riding Bobbys dick for the following three positions. Finally, as Monica pushed her ass back on Bobby, I got down and licked Bobbys ass. The Euro boys like that. Bobby moaned, and I could tell he was close to cumming. I kept licking, until he finally reached around and pulled me away from his ass by my hair. He grabbed Monica by the head as well, and placed us both on our knees in front of him and came on our faces, and in our mouths. With the cum still dripping off my face, Bobby dragged me up by my arm and bent me over the sofa in the back, and fucked me until I reached another orgasm. I dropped to my knees and crawled to Monica. I spit the remaining cum from my mouth to her pussy. Using my knee to push my hand, my fingers stuffed the cum into her. I fucked her like that until she crossed her eyes and lost it one last time. We made out as our hearts slowed down from racing, and the director yelled Cut!
Once in a great while, it happens: the Perfect Scene. Its when everyone, both performers and crew, are all completely synced in energy. Every position, every transition flows organically. The performers lose themselves sexually, yet are fully aware of the camera at all times; the penetration is always on display. The lighting is impeccable, no weird shadows or flares. Animalistic, fluids everywhere, sweat, spit, squirt; the energy is at 100 percent the entire thirty-five minutes, with no cuts. Perhaps a crazy position is invented; standing reverse scissors against a spiral staircase.
You recognize its happening about halfway through, and once the guy releases a healthy pop shot and the scene is finished, the whole team acknowledges it. The excitement in the room is unmistakable, and everyones voices are at least a pitch higher than before the shoot started.
Holy shit, great fucking scene! the director will exclaim.
I actually got a boner! jaded cameraman number two will joke.
That was one of my top ten scenes ever, Ill declare.
It feels something like just having done a first line of coke together, and everyone wants to talk at once and pat each other on the back for their respective role in the production. Its a high, and every scene we shoot, its that feeling we are chasing.
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