Treadwell - Death rows oddest inmates

Death Rows Oddest Inmates

By Ty Treadwell

Copyright Ty Treadwell

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form whatsoever without prior written consent from the author. Reviews may quote brief passages without written consent from the author as long as proper credit is given.

Table of Contents

Every social group has one member whos a little off. Maybe their sense of humor is a bit edgy, a bit inappropriate. Maybe they talk too loud, smile too wide, or have a strange look in their eyes. They might have bizarre hobbies and interests, or use words youve never heard before. One minute they make you laugh, the next minute they make you nervous.

In school, its the class clown. At work, its the office prankster. And despite the gloomy surroundings, every death row cell block has at least one oddball as well. Some of them goof off, act silly, and make nonstop wisecracks. Others have a dry, more sophisticated sense of humor. Some are amazingly articulate. Others ramble and rant like a mystic yogi on LSD. Some are regarded as flawed geniuses. Others are just flawed.

So if a convict cracks jokes about their own impending execution, does that make them totally warped or just a little bit weird? If a prisoner invents their own language or discusses space ships and time travel, should we consider them brilliant or brain-damaged?

It would be easy to simply label them all insane, but that would be a broad and inaccurate conclusion. Insanity is a highly popular defense strategyespecially during murder trialsbut its often used as a last-ditch effort when every other legal appeal has failed. Some killers do have past histories of mental instability, but others only show signs of dementia after spending countless years in prison.

Psychiatric experts have also pointed out that while its nearly impossible for an insane criminal to fake being sane, a sane criminal can pretend to be deranged without much effort. One of the most famous cases of this involved David Berkowitz, the serial killer known as Son of Sam. In court, Berkowitz claimed that a demon who took the form of a black dog instructed him to murder his six victims. Less than two years after he was convicted and given a 25-to-life sentence, Berkowitz admitted that he made up the stories about demons and dogs.

In a reverse situation, lawyers for Unabomber Theodore Kaczynski thought an insanity plea would help their client avoid a death sentence, but Kaczynskiwhose mail bomb campaign killed three people and wounded 23 othersrefused to go along and swore that he was mentally sound when he committed his crimes.

So whats the verdict on all those jailhouse jesters whooping it up in their cells? Are they clever and cunning, or just plain peculiar? The jurys still out on whether its creative genius or malfunctioning brain matter that fuels their actions, but one things for certain; despite the lack of sunshine, fresh air, and other pleasantries of daily life, theres apparently no shortage of silliness and outlandish behavior on death row.

The inventive skills of Thomas Edison. The resourcefulness of MacGyver. And the poor spelling ability of a slightly dim first grader. Put them all together, add a dash of humor and a spoonful of psychotic rage, and youve got Robert Vickersor Bonzai Bob, as he was known in the prison circuit.

Vickers began his life of crime at an early age; he developed a fondness for stabbing other children with pencils, and was arrested for the first time while still in sixth grade. As a teenager, Vickers turned his attention to theft. He once committed 12 burglaries in a 13-day period and confessed to dozens more while in custody. But it wasnt until Vickers entered the prison system that his criminal rampage truly began.

After being jailed for grand theft at age 19, Vickers added another 10 to 15 years to his sentence by stabbing a fellow inmate. Shortly afterward, Vickers was given a new roommate; convicted killer Frank Ponciano. The arrangement lasted less than two weeks.

One day while Vickers was napping, guards delivered lunch trays to the cell. Ponciano failed to wake Vickers up, and also drank the Kool-Aid from the other mans tray. Vickers was so enraged that he strangled Ponciano with a bed sheet then stabbed him with a homemade shank made from a sharpened toothbrush. Once Ponciano was dead, Vickers used the shank to carve bonzaia misspelled version of the famous Japanese war cryinto the other mans back.

At least he didnt spell it bonsai. Theres nothing less badass than those tiny little trees.

Bonzai Bob then yelled for the guards, saying Get this stinking son of a bitch out of my cell! I think he died last night. The guards were wary, but when Vickers started poking Ponciano with a lit cigar to prove he was dead, they entered the cell to inspect the body.

Vickers openly confessed his crime to the prison psychologists. He admitted to strangling and stabbing Ponciano and said his only regret was that he didnt have time to dot the i with a swastika when he carved bonzai into the other mans flesh.

Vickers wasnt upset when he was sentenced to death for the crime. In fact, he seemed eager to die and wondered why the state was taking so long to execute him. Whats the hold up, fella? he once wrote in a letter to the governor. If ya don't do it soon, Im gonna draw more blood than your cheap mops can absorb. Im a very impatient person. I never did like waiting. Ive got a date with the devils wife!

After his transfer to death row, Vickers became even more of a troublemaker. The wily killer was both clever and double-jointed, enabling him to escape from handcuffs and holding cells. He attacked guards and fellow inmates whenever he had the chance, and he had a knack for creating makeshift weapons from anything he could get his hands on. He could turn nearly any object into a knife, and he once stabbed a guard with a spear made from typewriter parts and rolled-up newspapers.

Vickers also escaped from his death row cell one night by shorting out the electronic lock then climbing through an air vent to the prison roof. Once he got there, though, he realized that he was too high up to jump. After performing a striptease for a nearby female guard, Vickers was roughly escorted back to his cell.

Less than a day before Vickers was scheduled to die in Arizonas gas chamber, a district judge granted him a stay of execution. Vickers went nuts and told reporters that he hoped somebody snuffed the judges mama. He also vowed to carve the judges name in his next victim if the state didnt execute him soon.

To speed up the process, Vickers decided to add a second murder victim to his long list of offenses. Buster Holsinger, another death row inmate, had once made a rude remark about Vickerss niece, so Vickers made a Molotov Cocktail by filling an empty ice cream carton with hair tonic, stuffing a strip of toilet paper inside, then lighting the crude device on fire. He tossed it into Busters cell, then squirted more hair tonic through the bars when the flames didnt seem high enough.

The entire death row block had to be evacuated because of the smoke, which nearly killed all the other inmates. When a guard asked Vickers what happened, he calmly replied, I burned Buster. The guard then asked if Buster was dead, and Vickers said, He should be. Hes on fire.

Vickers received yet another death sentence for murdering Buster Holsinger, and was promptly confined to his cell. The bars were covered with a sheet of thick plastic to keep Vickers from throwing out bodily waste or stabbing anyone who happened to walk by. Bonzai Bob spent his final days writing letters to the governor and other state officials, always using a swastika to dot the i in his nickname.

In one letter, Vickers asked if his last meal could be prepared by a woman. He also requested permission to wear a 3-piece suit to his execution. I wanna die dressed, he wrote. Gonna be some ladies there. I dont wanna go nude or in state clothes.