Gillespie Tyler - The awkward phase: the uplifting tales of those weird kids you went to high school with

Dedicated to our families, both given and chosen.
Were looking at you, Lynnae.

Copyright 2016 by Tyler Gillespie and Claire Linic

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any manner without the express written consent of the publisher, except in the case of brief excerpts in critical reviews or articles. All inquiries should be addressed to Skyhorse Publishing, 307 West 36th Street, 11th Floor, New York, NY 10018.

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Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data is available on file.

Cover design by Brian Peterson

Cover photos provided by contributors

Print ISBN: 978-1-63220-349-6

Ebook ISBN: 978-1-63220-802-6

Printed in China

Contents

To the world you might just be one person but to one person you might be their world.

Tyler made this awkward-embracing (great) piece of art back during his senior year of high school (2005). Yes, we think its awesome, too.

The Awkward Phase

O h, hi there. Were so glad to see youre picking up our book, and that your hair is looking great right now. Not to be forward (though foreword), but this is when were supposed to introduce ourselves, so nice to meet you and here goes.

In the moments between YouTube video dance parties in our work break room, we decided to create some type of comedy project that wasnt biting or sarcastictwo realities we had sometimes experienced during our other comedic pursuits.

Everyone had an awkward phase , we thought. Those times made us who we are today .

Nearly a year and a half before The Awkward Phase thought, we had met on our first day of a part-time job at a museum in Chicagos Hyde Park, where, fun fact, President Obama owns a house (weve never been, please invite us for dinner, and well bring a dish). As the story is remembered, on that day in October we were two of the earliest birds, still not used to public transit. We sat next to each other at a small round table, near escalators leading up to the place that made a choice to hire us. As we filled out paperwork, we chatted about our home states Florida and Nebraska. Neither of us had lived in Chicago for long, and finding a partner in the struggle of oft-maligned states, we immediately bonded. Sunshine-state stereotypes and corn jokes. Awkward kid recognizes awkward kid.

For a few months after this first day, we went our separate work-waysoff to different departments. Our paths often crossed, but we were both so busy stress-crying and dealing with the impending winter that we didnt have much time for anything besides it s really cold , bye . As luckalso known as a horizontal departmental transitionwould have it, in the summer we ended up on the same work team, in a huge movie theater. We dubbed it the darkest and coldest place in the city.

The Awkward Phase started in our break room, away from the field-trip kids talking about love and life during the movie we were supposed to monitor. The break room was a small space with carpeted walls and no windows. It looked more like a padded room than a place for midday coffee binges. But, maybe its a metaphoror, more likely, maybe its not.

Anyway, we needed a laugh.

After we threw around some ideaslike mom-stylewe settled on what we had most in common and what people dont usually like to talk about: our awkwardness.

**Start Flashback** Back in the 90s, when slap bracelets and Velcro ruled supreme, two adolescents stumbled around on gangly limbs. One, Claire Linic, had permed her bowl cut, and the other, Tyler Gillespie, had recently purchased self-tanner and told the cashier it was for his girlfriend. Those moments were first-day-of-school rough. But, looking back, we thought those days were actually kind of awesome, because DAY-GLO and BOWL CUTS . **End Flashback**

From our Florida-Nebraska talk on the first workday, our awkwardness acted as a summer-camp friendship bracelet. With our combined decades of awkward life, this idea was such a perfect fit it wasnt even funny. No... wait, it was funnywere trying to get you to buy this book. Its super funny! We survived our awkward teenage years, and as almost-thriving twenty-somethings, we decided to ask ourselves a question. If we could talk to our fourteen-year-old selves, what would we tell them ?

Looking back at our stories and pictures, we realized how often our brace-face years stay hidden in the cynical shadows. At first we were embarrassed of the people in those photos; they had acne and people made fun of their big ears. We thought bringing these picturesthe people we wereto light would further open us to schoolyard name-calling. But, in an Oprah-esque moment of clarity, we realized these stories need to be told, because part of being okay with who you are now is respecting each stage of your life. The kids in those pictures have been teased enough. Well give you a quick break here to grab a pen and jot down a note to your former self. Seriously, youll probably be glad you did.

We launched The Awkward Phase with the aim of inspiring people to celebrate their awkward years rather than disown them. Our goal is for people to feel more comfortable with the past, which, for a lot of people, was filled with loads of insecurity. In sharing these stories, we also believe it helps youngsters who currently feel weighed down by their awkwardness. The Awkward Phase reclaims those years when you might not have felt cool, but that helped turn you into the awesome and empathetic adult you are today. Everyone has had an awkward phaseeven Jennifer Aniston has said she did!so lets learn to love those pictures we once wanted to burn.

In the following pages, we have collected triumphantly awkward stories from seasoned comedians to YouTube stars to our family members. In these pages, you will read about a boy who realized he was gay because of Richard Simmons, a girl who obsessively wrote to Reba McEntire, and Rat-Boy. There are Mall Glamour Shots, Picnic Costumes, and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles . Weve got Beanie Babies, American Girl Dolls, and Fearless Rascals. Oh, and a mothers advice on school picture day.

Feel free to laughits what helped our contributors learn to love these times of their lives. Unlike other books that take a more biting schoolyard stance, with The Awkward Phase , everyone is in on the joke. You dont have to eat your lunch alone in the bathroom stall. You can sit with us. This is a book about owning your awkward. This is a story of your triumph.

XOXO,

Tyler Gillespie and Claire Linic

To any of our future employers, wed like to note we were on unpaid breaks. Were really hard workers. HIRE US.

Were still kind of into this idea. Moms are awesome.

Note to Readers

People all over the country graciously sent us their photos and stories. Weve tried to keep these accounts as true to their own voices as possible. Edits were made for clarity, length, and speling [sic]. Most contributors changed the names of other people in their submission(s) to protect the innocent. If you know a person, and you think theres a resemblance to you, wed suggest taking it as a complimentyou made an impression. These pages are filled with awesome, and we couldnt have done it without each and every one of the awkward kids.