Alice D. Domar - Finding Calm for the Expectant Mom: Tools for Reducing Stress, Anxiety, and Mood Swings During Your Pregnancy
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- Book:Finding Calm for the Expectant Mom: Tools for Reducing Stress, Anxiety, and Mood Swings During Your Pregnancy
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Pregnancy is exciting and exhilarating, but it can also be physically and psychologically demanding. The myth, perpetuated by social media, says that you should be glowing, but in reality, you may be anxious and find yourself on an emotional roller coaster. And that is okay. Feeling stressed and moody are very normal reactions to the changes your body is going through, the thoughts you might have about how your pregnancy will impact your career and relationships, and the social pressure to have a perfect pregnancy. High levels of stress and anxiety are not good for you or your baby, but there are ways to cope with and counteract these feelings, put them in perspective, and bring peace to your pregnancy. It is indeed possible to learn new skills that will enable you to glow and thrive.
In addition to featuring fun quizzes, stories of women with whom Dr. Alice Domar has worked, and information, advice, and encouragement, Finding Calm for the Expectant Mom includes mind-body techniques that can relieve stress, anxiety, and moodiness. With the tools and problem-solving approach presented here, you can adjust your expectations, restructure negative thought patterns, cultivate resilience, and not only meet the challenges of pregnancy, but happily anticipate the most amazing experience of your life: becoming a mother.
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H EALING M IND, H EALTHY W OM AN:
Using the Mind-Body Connection to Manage Stress and Take Control of Your Life
S IX S TEPS TO I NC REASED F ERTILITY:
An Integrated Medical and Mind/Body Program to Promote Conception (coauthor)
S ELF- N URTURE:
Learning to Care for Yourself as Effectively as You Care for Everyone Else
C ONQUERING I NFERTILITY:
Dr. Alice Domars Mind/Body Guide to Enhancing Fertility and Coping with Infertility
B E H APPY WITHOUT B EING P ERFECT:
How to Worry Less and Enjoy Life More
L IVE A L ITTLE!
Breaking the Rules Wont Break Your Health (with Dr. Susan Love)
An imprint of Penguin Random House LLC
375 Hudson Street
New York, New York 10014
Copyright 2016 by Alice D. Domar, Ph.D.
Penguin supports copyright. Copyright fuels creativity, encourages diverse voices, promotes free speech, and creates a vibrant culture. Thank you for buying an authorized edition of this book and for complying with copyright laws by not reproducing, scanning, or distributing any part of it in any form without permission. You are supporting writers and allowing Penguin to continue to publish books for every reader.
Tarcher and Perigee are registered trademarks, and the colophon is a trademark of Penguin Random House LLC.
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eBook ISBN: 9780698184442
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Names: Domar, Alice D., author. | Curry Oakes, Sheila, author.
Title: Finding calm for the expectant mom : tools for reducing stress, anxiety, and mood swings during your pregnancy / Alice D. Domar, PhD, with Sheila Curry Oakes.
Description: New York, New York : TarcherPerigee, [2016]
Identifiers: LCCN 2016004892 | ISBN 9780399173134 (paperback)
Subjects: LCSH: PregnancyPopular works. | ChildbirthPopular works. | WomenHealth and hygiene. | Stress management for women. | BISAC: HEALTH & FITNESS / Pregnancy & Childbirth. | SELF-HELP / Stress Management. | HEALTH & FITNESS / Womens Health.
Classification: LCC RG525 .D653 2016 | DDC 618.2dc23
Some names and identifying characteristics have been changed to protect the privacy of the individuals involved.
Neither the publisher nor the author is engaged in rendering professional advice or services to the individual reader. The ideas, procedures, and suggestions contained in this book are not intended as a substitute for consulting with your physician. All matters regarding your health require medical supervision. Neither the author nor the publisher shall be liable or responsible for any loss or damage allegedly arising from any information or suggestion in this book.
Version_1
LYM,
Mom
In memory of Henry Dreher, who introduced me to the joy and meaning of writing.
A S AN O BSTETRICIAN , I am well aware that pregnancy has both joys and trials. The problem is that many of my patients expect the joys but not the trials. Now, Ali Domar has provided this beautifully written and practical guide that will help women see a more realistic view of both sides of pregnancy and learn some simple yet highly effective techniques to cope with the mood changes and anxiety that can come with even the healthiest of pregnancies. My favorite part is the appendix of mind/body resources, The Calm Mom-to-BeMind/Body Techniques to Reduce Stress and Anxiety. I found myself applying some of the techniques to stressful areas of my own life: stop, breathe, reflect, and choose. The stories and lessons we learn from Domar are filled with her particular brand of experience, wisdom, warmth, and humor. If youve ever been lucky enough to hear Dr. Domar speak, youll hear her voice throughout the book. Having this trusted voice to help guide women through pregnancy brings calm to me!
Hope A. Ricciotti, M.D.
Chair, Department of Obstetrics and Gynecology, Beth Israel Deaconess Medical Center, Harvard Medical School
T HINK ABOUT THE words many of us use to describe pregnancy. Miraculous. Joyful. Blissful. Awe inspiring. Amazing. Perfect. Exciting. Glowing. A dream come true. A blessing. The most incredible experience of a womans life. If this is the way you are feeling all the time, you dont need this book. But if you also have your share of challenging moments, read on!
These were some of the words that were flying around in the mind of Liv, one of my patients, who got pregnant not long after she began seeing me for counseling.
The test was positiveIm pregnant! she gushed on the phone just minutes after receiving her results. Now that Im pregnant, my life is perfect! I have everything Ive ever wanted. My dream has come true! I dont need counseling anymore.
I had my doubts. But I didnt want to rain on Livs parade, so I congratulated her and told her to call me if she changed her mind. Im always here for you, I said. Liv had become pregnant after about six months of trying. During that time, she had been pretty miserable; she wanted so much to become a mother, and she felt terribly frustrated by how long it had taken her to conceive. She struggled with feelings of sadness, worry, and guilt. Arguments between her and her husband sprang up more frequently than they had before, and Liv had started to lose interest in her career.
I was thrilled for Liv; I knew how deeply she yearned for a baby. But I also worried about her a bit. Pregnancy is indeed an amazing, miraculous, exciting experience. But it is also a momentous physical and emotional challenge that many first-time motherslike Livunderestimate.
In a Word
Words most commonly associated with pregnancy, according to legend:
Radiant
Peaceful
Glowing
Contented
Serene
Fulfilled
Madonna
Feminine
Happy
Womanly
Words most commonly associated with pregnancy, according to Google:
Tired
Dizzy
Painful
Big
Morning sickness
Stretch marks
Worry
Expensive
Uncomfortable
Swelling
It didnt surprise me a few weeks later when Liv called to make an appointment to see me. Her pregnancy was progressing normally, but she didnt feel amazing, awesome, or perfect. She felt physically tapped out by morning sickness and fatigue. Her emotions confused her; instead of feeling joyful and satisfied, she felt cheerless and distressed, miserable rather than blissful. Arguments between her and her husband were occurring even more frequently than before.
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