Carolyn A. Brent - The Caregivers Companion: Caring for Your Loved One Medically, Financially and Emotionally While Caring for Yourself

CONTENTS

Everything you need to know to ensure that your older loved one is being properly cared for, from nationally acclaimed author, speaker and caregiver advocate Carolyn A. Brent.

People today are not only living longer, they are also living sickermaking aging and caring for older loved ones more complicated than ever before. In this extensive guide, caregiver advocate Carolyn A. Brent outlines a step-by-step process so caregivers know what to do and what to ask in every situation that may arise, including:

• Signs that your loved one needs more assistance
• What to look for in a retirement home
• Caretaking in your own home
• How to ensure wills are in order
• How to manage difficult family relationships
• Ensuring you are getting the help and care you need

Brent leaves no stone unturned, provides personal stories and scenarios for context, and includes other references and resources in this complete guide to caregiving.

An excellent, comprehensive guide to everything both new and seasoned caregivers need to know.

Library Journal on The Caregivers Companion

Brents positive, inspiring messages about self-love, giving back, and rejoicing should resonate with many.

Booklist on Transforming Your Life through Self-Care

A timely, thought provoking page-turner that should be considered a desk reference for caregivers and those who would be caregivers of all ages.

Rawle Andrews Jr., Esq., regional vice president, AARP, on Why Wait?

A personal, compelling account. It is thorough, accurate, and highly credible. Brents straightforward advice can serve as an excellent help to anyone in the situation of working with siblings on parent care. I highly recommend it!

Carolyn L. Rosenblatt, RN, attorney, author of The Boomers Guide to Aging Parents, on Why Wait?

Brent is truly inspirational. Her book offers us the universal wisdom of her life lessons. She has set a new, elevated standard for turning adversity [in]to love and redemption.

Mikol Davis, PhD, geriatric psychologist, CEO of AgingParents.com, on Why Wait?

Why Wait? The Baby Boomers Guide to Preparing Emotionally, Financially and Legally for a Parents Death

Transforming Your Life through Self-Care: A Guide to Tapping into Your Deep Beauty and Inner Worth

The Caregivers Emotional Survival Guide: Navigating through the Healthcare System

The Caregivers Legal Survival Guide: Navigating through the Legal System

The Caregivers Financial Survival Guide: Navigating Through The Financial System

AMAZING GRACE: How My Father Taught Me to Rejoice in the Word of Our Father

To my dad, Pastor William L. Brent, ThD. I will be forever grateful to have been blessed with him, the most wonderful and amazing parent I could have ever hoped or asked for. His words of wisdom: No excuses. Find a way. Believe for a miracle. Press on till you win. Dont quit!

And many thanks to the unsung caregivers throughout the world.

CONTENTS

Dear Reader,

Im thrilled to welcome you to the revised edition of The Caregivers Companion: Caring for Your Loved One Medically, Financially and Emotionally While Caring for Yourself. The book is written for family caregivers, health care professionals and extended family members caring for a loved one.

Readers have told me this book has served them well in its previous publication, and I believe this edition will accomplish even more. I have retained the structure, scope and purpose of the original book, while thoroughly updating chapters with the latest research and medical, financial, legal, delivery of care and self-care practices. I have also included revised appendixes with new bibliographic references, websites, and updated addresses of associations and state offices. Ive also heard your request about going more in-depth on the subjects of managing stress and incorporating meditation in the life of a caregiver, and Ive added two additional discussion chapters that will enhance your caregiving experience.

The topics that have been broadly revised with updated information include the following:

• Crucial Financial Conversations
• Crucial Legal Conversations
• COVID-19/Pandemic Planning Checklist for Long-Term Care Facilities
• Millennials Are Stepping into Caregiving Responsibilities
• Hospice Care
• Self-Care as a Caregiver
• Eight Steps to Dealing with Caregiver Stress
• Incorporating Meditation into Self-Care

The Caregivers Companion has offered comfort as a step-by-step guide and support tool to millions of people in North America and throughout the world as they address their caregiver challenges and cope with their own emotions and needs. Designated as an Editors Choice as well as rated excellent by Library Journal, this book is the ultimate caregivers guide to caring for a loved one while caring for yourself.

All my best to you,

Carolyn A. Brent

PREFACE

My dad and I were very close. As a single parent, he raised me from the time I was twelve until I was nineteen, the age at which I left home. That year I moved from Denver to Los Angeles to explore the world. Dad remarried and we remained close. Over the years, Id look forward to his visits to Los Angeles each March to celebrate his birthday and catch up. Because Dad was a church pastor, he used our special time together to share the word of God with me.

There was one birthday visit Ill never forget. I decided to take Dad to Redondo Beach on a Wednesday afternoon. Hardly any people were around, and it was a beautiful day. The ocean was misty, and the moon had risen and was hanging above us in the sky. Dad and I walked along the beach for a while, until we found a comfortable spot to sit in the sand. Then, as we sat gazing at the water and listening to the calls of the seagulls and pelicans that were gracefully flying by, he began to talk to me about Gods love for humanity.

Pointing to one pelican slowly soaring high in the sky, silhouetted against the moon, Dad said, Carolyn, do you see that pelican? Imagine if that beautiful bird had only one responsibility in life. What if it had to fly to the moon and drop off a single grain of sand that it was carrying in its pouch, and then it had to repeat this task until all the sand was removed from the face of the earth? Looking directly at me, he asked, How long do you think it would take?

It would take forever, I answered.

The love of God and my love for you are eternal, he said. Even after Ive gone to glory, for as long as it would take a pelican to remove the sand from the earth a grain at a time, thats how long my love will be with you.

That was the first time I can recall Dad speaking with me about the prospect of his death. Of course, I didnt really want to discuss it, and, in fact, I think I changed the subject. Being in my twenties then, death seemed far off. On some level, I felt that Dad would live forever and nothing bad could ever happen to him. But I also made a vow to God on that day that Id always be there to take care of Dad if he needed me. Later on, I did my best to honor this promise.

My dad was my best friend, my hero and my adviser, and I hoped and prayed hed be with me forever. The good times I had with him continued for the next thirty-three years, and there were many opportunities for us to discuss his end-of-life wishes. We did the best we could to prepare.