Alec Lace - First Class Fatherhood: Advice and Wisdom from High-Profile Dads

First Class Fatherhood

Copyright 2022 by Alec Lace

All rights reserved. No portion of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any meanselectronic, mechanical, photocopy, recording, scanning, or otherexcept for brief quotations in critical reviews or articles, without the prior written permission of the publisher.

Published by Harper Horizon, an imprint of HarperCollins Focus LLC.

Book design by Aubrey Khan, Neuwirth & Associates.

Any internet addresses, phone numbers, or company or product information printed in this book are offered as a resource and are not intended in any way to be or to imply an endorsement by Harper Horizon, nor does Harper Horizon vouch for the existence, content, or services of these sites, phone numbers, companies, or products beyond the life of this book.

ISBN 978-0-7852-4104-1 (eBook)

ISBN 978-0-7852-4103-4 (HC)

Epub Edition February 2022 9780785241041

Library of Congress Control Number: 2021944108

Printed in the United States of America

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TO JESSICA. I LOVE YOU.

Are you waiting for your tires?

TO CHRIS, LOGAN, AIDEN, & EMILY.

You make me feel like a First Class Father every day.

As a dad, everything is going to change.

Its going to be exhausting, its going to be challenging, its going to sometimes seem impossible, but its all worth it.

TONY HAWK

T HOUSANDS OF HOURS of video footage of you being a dad can be eye-opening and, at times, cringeworthy, but it does force you to take an honest look at yourself and help you become a better father. Little People, Big World has provided me this opportunity.

Becoming a father was a radical change for me. I went from being super focused on my career to becoming the custodian of four precious lives. The responsibility was stunning. We had our twins first and one of them is a little person, like me and my ex-wife, Amy, who both have dwarfism, and one of them is average size, so we had our hands full. Having children revolutionized our perspective and our life, and it continues to do so to this day.

At times along my fatherhood journey, I thought I was being a great father because I was home and present. However, sometimes I was chasing my own vision for my kids lives. For instance, three of my kids loved building forts, but my youngest one didnt. I pushed him on that for a few years and also tried to get him into wrestling, which I did as a kid. It can be difficult to know when to pivot and focus on childrens unique interests, and I didnt always make those turns soon enough, because I was trying to influence them in a certain direction. Now, as a grandfather, Im committed to understanding what they like.

If I had to pick one hero in my life, it would be my father. He was a huge presence in my life. We always ate dinner together as a family and prayed at the table together as a family. He shared some of the best wisdom with me, not just from the Bible but also about having confidence in myself and knowing I could be anything I wanted to be. He instilled in me a sense of self-worth and respect, and was an inspirational figure to me.

I dont expect my legacy as a dad to be that I was a perfect father. But I do want my kids and grandkids to look back and remember that I was always therethat we could sit down and have a conversation about anything, and that I would listen.

Ive had the pleasure of getting to know Alec Lace well over the last few years and have enjoyed his company at the farm. I respect guys like Alec, who work multiple jobs while raising four kids and chasing a vision to promote fatherhood with his podcast, First Class Fatherhood. Im amazed by what he does, and he inspires me.

Alec has hosted some of the most incredible fathers in the world on his podcast. My favorite part of the interviews, which I always anticipate, is when he asks his guests what advice they have for new or soon-to-be dads. His podcast and this book, both of which Im honored to have been a part of, provide invaluable wisdom for dadsespecially new dads.

As we look around our country right now, things seem chaotic. I truly believe, as I know Alec does, that if we could get our families back to the dinner table, praying together, this would create a ripple effect that would fundamentally improve our society. There is no rule book for fatherhood, and youll often question yourself and your decisions as a dad. But having a toolbox full of advice and wisdom, captured by Alec in First Class Fatherhood, can be a guiding light on your fatherhood journey.

MATT ROLOFF

I M PREGNANT!

The first time you hear your partner speak these words, the best chapter of your life is about to begin.

Unfortunately, in part because of Hollywood and pop culture, many men feel that becoming a dad is something to avoid or fear and not something to aspire to or embrace. Many men are taught to believe having a wife and kids is a ball and chain that will prevent them from pursuing their dreams and hold them back from living a fulfilling life. And many messages from our culture tell us that true happiness can and will be found in material things.

As a part-time Uber driver, I saw this on the faces of the young men I drove around on the weekends. When Id tell them I have four children, theyd look at me as if I had four heads. Theyd rattle off the reasons they didnt have kids and why they werent sure they ever wanted them. These experiences set me on a mission to change this negative perception of fatherhood and family life.

In January 2018, I was helping my kids try to start a YouTube channel. I was filming my daughter open packages of toys, because for some reason, videos of whats called unboxing seem to be popular. I explained to my kids that a lot of work goes into a successful channelthat its more than turning on the camera and fooling around. I quickly discovered many skill sets are involved in making YouTube videos. While doing my research for how to create a channel and edit videos, I stumbled upon the new and fast-growing platform of podcasting.

To me, the most intriguing part of podcasting was that it was audio only and thus eliminated the need for shooting and editing videos. I borrowed some library books, and I was sold on the idea of starting a podcastone that would give me the opportunity to spread my positive message about fatherhood, and to show my kids the amount of hard work that goes into making your own show. The first thing I needed was a name for the podcast.

I am the seventh and youngest child of a blended family. My father was fifty years old when I was born in 1980, and my mother was forty-two. At that time, my dad was selling cars on Jerome Avenue in the Bronx, New York. But back in 1955, hed been a stand-in singer for Eddie Fisher during the days of the musical variety television series Coke Time with Eddie Fisher. At a young age I became a huge fan of the classic, old-school movies and TV shows. The Three Stooges, the Marx Brothers, James Cagney, Humphrey Bogart, and Edward G. Robinson, among others, were my favorites.

As I thought about a name for my podcast, I recalled a movie Id seen several times, which featured Humphrey Bogart and Edward G. Robinson, Brother Orchid. In the film, Robinson plays a gangster and crime boss whos on a mission to acquire class by traveling the world and buying fancy material things. When he returns from a trip to Europe, one of his gang members, played by Humphrey Bogart, has taken control. Bogart decides to have Robinson whacked to get him out of the way. Hit men shoot Robinson several times, but he escapes. A monastery takes him in and nurses him back to health. Robinson becomes a novice member of the monks, to hide out and lay low for a while.