Aviva Jill Romm - Natural Health after Birth: the Complete Guide to Postpartum Wellness

Natural Health after Birth

Thirty years ago, when I had my babies, we were rediscovering natural birth and breast-feeding. But, we struggled alone during postpartum. If I had been able to read Avivas book then, I would have cried less. Every new mother should have a copy of this book.

PEGGY OMARA,

EDITOR AND PUBLISHER

OF MOTHERING MAGAZINE

Natural Health

after Birth

The Complete Guide to

Postpartum Wellness

AVIVA JILL ROMM

Dedication

To my beautiful childrenIyah, Yemima, Forest, and Naomiwho love me regardless of the fact that I keep writing books, who have grown so beautiful that every day of my life is filled with continual awe, and who are my best friends and teachers. You are my beloveds forever.

To my husband, Tracy Romm, who took such loving care of me after each of our babies was born, who takes care of me as each book is born, and who is rock solid in my life.

To Kim Land, Sarahn Henderson, and Lisa Olko, who were also there after my babies were born, and who have been here ever since. And to Lizzie McDaniels Feigenbaum, who began this journey with me and who continues it with me ever steady. May deep satisfaction and joy be yours, and may your families be blessed with strength and love.

To the midwives, herbalists, and docs who are my friends, teachers, and companions in this work we are blessed to do. It is truly a pleasure to share this road with each of you. Our passions and our hearts meet in sacred places and I am honored to know each of you as part of my family. Thanks especially to Roy Upton, David Winston, Andy Ellis, and Lesley and Michael Tierra for information on Native American and traditional Chinese postpartum care traditions.

To my mom, Wendy, and my grandma Ida, who welcomed me into the world and who love me still.

To Jon Graham and Lee Juvan, my editors at Healing Arts Press: Jon, who helped this book get its start; and Lee, who put up with me with endless faith as I kept extending past my deadline... and to Lees family, which grew to include her first baby as this book was nearing completion (I got it done for your postpartum, at least, eh?).

And to all of the families who have let me into the secret, magical, hard, and joyous places of their lives. You have shaped who I am.

I love the infinite light within each of you.

Introduction

Circles

The moon is most happy when it is full

And the sun always looks like a perfectly minted gold coin that was just

Placed in flight

By Gods playful kiss

And so many varieties of fruit hang plump and round from

Branches that seem like a sculptors hands

I see the beautiful curve of a pregnant belly

Shaped by a soul within

And the earth itself and the planets and the spheres

I have gotten a hint

There is something about circles the beloved likes.

Hafiz

A woman is the full circle, within her is the powerto create, nurture, and transform.

Diane Marieschild

Y ou havent had a full nights sleep in 6 weeks (or has it been 6 months?), you weigh 15 pounds more than youd like to and still dont fit into your favorite jeans, your sex life seems to have gone out the window, and you havent dusted your house in longer than you care to remember. Your girlfriend from work stops by and, after telling you how cute the baby is, fills you in on all the gossip from work as well as on the business accounts you handed over to her while taking an extended maternity leave without pay so you could be home with your precious baby. Your precious baby is now crying because your girlfriends visit interfered with his napand yoursand you are exhausted, too. After she leaves, you break down crying along with the baby. As you sink onto your bed to nurse him, you feel confused about your new role, what youre missing by being home full time, and whether its all worth it. You feel lost and out of touch with the adult world.

Yet as your baby begins to nurse, his crying stops and he looks up into your eyes, a smile playing at the corner of his lips as he desperately tries to keep nursing while communicating his love to you. Soon his eyes drift backward in sleep, and you melt at his beauty and pure sweetness. You begin to relax, remember why you chose to be home with your baby, and, picking up a book to read, feel the bliss of motherhood sweep over you. You, too, soon drift off to sleep, grateful for these precious moments with your child. Sound familiar? Its postpartum!

The time after birth is known as the postpartum or postnatal periodboth terms meaning after birth. Medical texts define postpartum as the 6-week period of time from after the birth of the baby until a womans reproductive organs have returned to their nonpregnant condition. However, this definition is too limited. It ignores the fact that it takes much longer than 6 weeks to heal from giving birth, and much longer than this to adjust to the momentous experience of becoming a mother.

This is a time of enormous physical, emotional, psychological, and spiritual growth and change for women (and men), whether or not this is your first child. Its also a time of great emotional ups and downs and conflicting feelings. Each passage through birth and into motherhood is a journey into the unknown, with new hopes, fears, expectations, and demands. Although newborns are doted on with kisses, praise, and gifts, most women receive little special attention and nurturing during this time, leaving many new mothers to doubt whether theyre up to the task when they feel stressed, exhausted, or overwhelmed in spite of the sweet and adorable bundle they hold in their arms. And many mothersmost, in factfeel isolated in the experience of motherhood, wondering if theyre the only ones who think theyre coming apart at the seams. Factors such as a difficult or disappointing birth, financial worries, and an unsupportive environment can compound stress, anxiety, and a sense of aloneness.

Defining the postpartum as a finite period of 6 weeks leads many new mothers to feel as if theyre taking too long to get it together, or that theyre overwhelmed by something that shouldnt be such a big deal. It also leads many women to go without help and support too quickly after birth, and to return to work outside the home before they are emotionally or physically ready. Societal expectations also revolve around this arbitrarily allotted 6-week period. Many employers expect women to be back to their old selves after 6 weeks, the obstetricians and midwifes care packages end at 6 weeks, and even husbands, other relatives, and friends expect Mom to be able to cope on her own by then.