Rachel Jonat - The Minimalist Mom: How to Simply Parent Your Baby

Avon, Massachusetts

Dedication

For my firstborn, Henry, who never liked the bouncer or exersaucer or the activity mat. You were wise from the start.

Copyright 2016 by Rachel Jonat.

All rights reserved.

This book, or parts thereof, may not be reproduced in any form without permission from the publisher; exceptions are made for brief excerpts used in published reviews.

Published by

Adams Media, an imprint of Simon & Schuster, Inc.

57 Littlefield Street, Avon, MA 02322. U.S.A.

www.adamsmedia.com

ISBN 10: 1-4405-9755-3

ISBN 13: 978-1-4405-9755-8

eISBN 10: 1-4405-9756-1

eISBN 13: 978-1-4405-9756-5

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Jonat, Rachel, author.

The minimalist mom: how to simply parent your baby / by Rachel Jonat. Avon, Massachusetts: Adams Media, [2016]

LCCN 2016012632 | ISBN 9781440597558 (pb) | ISBN 1440597553 (pb) | ISBN 9781440597565 (ebook) | ISBN 1440597561 (ebook)

LCSH: Simplicity. | Families. | Child rearing. | Parenting. | Lifestyles. | BISAC: FAMILY & RELATIONSHIPS / Parenting / General. | FAMILY & RELATIONSHIPS / Life Stages / Infants & Toddlers.

LCC BJ1496.J663 2016 | DDC 649/.122--dc23

LC record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2016012632

This book is intended as general information only, and should not be used to diagnose or treat any health condition. In light of the complex, individual, and specific nature of health problems, this book is not intended to replace professional medical advice. The ideas, procedures, and suggestions in this book are intended to supplement, not replace, the advice of a trained medical professional. Consult your physician before adopting any of the suggestions in this book, as well as about any condition that may require diagnosis or medical attention. The author and publisher disclaim any liability arising directly or indirectly from the use of this book.

Cover design by Frank Rivera.

A four-bedroom house with a fenced-in yard. Three different strollers. Stuffed animals that sing, light up, and promise to make your three-month-old sleep through the night. A closet full of tiny, coordinated outfits. (With shoes.) Music and swim classes.

Oh, the massive amount of stuff that they say you need to buy and do for a new baby. Or do you?

Its time to cut through the avalanche of gear and activities and remember whats most important: quality time with your baby. How can you get more of that? With minimalist parenting. Resist the temptation to have more, do more, and buy more, and youll find yourself feeling free. Youll have more money, less stress, and more time, thanks to your streamlined efficiencies. Being a minimalist parent gives you the time and energy to be more engaged with your kids, more intentional in your actions, and more focused on your familys happiness and well-being.

I know you can live with less because I do it with my family. My blog, The Minimalist Mom at www.theminimalistmom.com/blog/ , started as a place for me to document my familys journey to a minimalist lifestyle. After my first son was born, I bought every gadget, swaddle, and toy in hopes that it would make my baby sleep more and bring some peace to our tired lives as parents of a newborn. None of it lived up to the promises on the boxand all of it created more for me to tidy, clean, and pay for. I was supposed to be enjoying parenthood and my beautiful new baby, but instead I was managing all the stuff accumulating in our home. Add in that we were in $80,000 of nonmortgage debt, and I was a very stressed-out new mom.

Then I heard about minimalism; about letting go of things and living smaller; having more time instead of buying more stuff. I didnt want to sell everything and live out of a backpack, but could I take the tenets of minimalism and apply them to my conventional life? I loved the idea of less, but I also loved having a couch and a dining room table, and even a few sweet but impractical outfits for my baby. I took the plunge and donated, sold and recycled five carloads worth of housewares, electronics, clothing, and furniture. The result: less debt and stress and more time and space. We were out of nonmortgage debt in two short years. I felt less rushed, and it was easier to handle the inevitable and normal baby tears and rough sleep patches.

Since then, weve added two more children to our family. One of the best things we learned through minimalism is to forget about what other families are doing, or have, and instead zero in on what brings the best value and makes our life easiest. We have the money to hire great babysitters and the occasional cleaner because we dont buy a lot of things and we live in a small home with a modest mortgage payment. Minimalism continues to be one of the greatest gifts I have given both my family and myself.

This is a book about making the tough job of parenting easier by simplifying. Less stuff, more help. This is a book about being intentional about all that baby gear and not getting swept up in the tide of buying more new stuff at every turn. This is a book about figuring out what you really need instead of automatically buying what you can easily do without.

When you guard your space, money, and time when you have children, youll simplify a lot of the challenges that new parents face. And when you make things simple, you make life a bit easier, a bit slower, and a lot more enjoyable.

In the tapestry of childhood, what stands out is not the splashy, blow-out trips to Disneyland but the common threads that run throughout and repeat: the family dinners, nature walks, reading together at bedtime, Saturday morning pancakes.

Kim John Payne

Many of us live in houses that are larger than we actually need... yet it rarely seems that way. Why? Because we own so much stuff! People buy fives times as much clothing now as they did in the 1980s. Our homes are filled with gadgets, dcor, abandoned art projects, forgotten sports equipment, and clothing we bought four years ago and still havent worn. In short, we have a lot of stuff. Then, you have a baby and the amount of stuff seems to quadruple. Minimalist parenting is a way out of that never-ending quest to get more, bigger, larger.

We have so much stuff because things are cheap and easy to acquire today. We have credit cards and same-day delivery, and its all too easy to go to the store for a few things and bring home a cool stroller along with the bread and milk. We buy it thinking it will make life easier or more enjoyable, but does it? The more we buy, the more we have to pay for, clean up, repair, and maintain. That item we bought to entertain us or make life simpler ends up gathering dust or breaking or we lose interest and move on to the next new product that sells the same promise.

You can no longer pack all of your belongings, and your kids, in a covered wagon for a cross-country move; the idea of squeezing everything we own into a minivan or SUV is preposterous, and yet, that was once the norm. More is now convenient and cheap and the answer to struggles big and small. But more often just creates more: more work, more stress, more to look after, more to do, more to pay for, more to clean. Unless were talking about free and fantastic childcare, more certainly doesnt make parenting a new baby easier.