Lucy Rocca - Your Six Week Plan

YOUR 6 WEEK PLAN

Sarah Turner and Lucy Rocca

Published by Accent Press Ltd 2013

ISBN 9781783752089

Copyright Sarah Turner and Lucy Rocca 2013

Sarah Turner and Lucy Rocca have asserted their rights to be identified as the authors of this work in accordance with the Copyright, Designs and

Patents Act 1988

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying or otherwise without the prior permission of the publisher: Accent Press Ltd, Ty Cynon House, Navigation Park, Abercynon CF45 4SN

THE SOBER REVOLUTION: YOUR 6 WEEK PLAN

Time Please, Ladies!

By Lucy Rocca

All of us experience sparks of ideas in fleeting moments; a sudden decision to live another way or to enact a deep and lasting change to the person we are inside. Frequently these monumental thoughts disappear into the ether before we have time to grab on to them and set about putting them into practice. The classic example is those we experience at the end of a particularly wonderful holiday during which we have lived differently to the norm and want desperately to maintain that new way of living once we arrive back home.

And then something happens or rather, things happen; the kids need help with their homework and/or taking to football practice or a horse riding lesson, the fridge is empty and the house needs a damn good clean, the dog has just run in from the garden and left muddy footprints all over the newly-polished wooden floor demanding it be mopped for the third time in a day, and the ironing pile is almost touching the ceiling and those little gems that sparked so briefly quietly dissipate, forgotten and lost to the mountain of unrealised dreams in the back of our minds.

So how can you take hold of a desire to change, put it into practice and live your life differently on a permanent basis? For me, the notion that I would one day eradicate alcohol from my life built up gradually over a five year period. There was no sudden flash of lightning that by itself served to provide me with the tools I needed to become alcohol-free in contrast I experienced several events during my early thirties that accumulated and eventually became a great big, no arguments, refusal isnt an option, one-way ticket to booze-free living. I took it with both hands.

The final push that saw me transformed from a reckless, irresponsible person who lived for wine and nights out, to a calm, happy, contented, and self-assured woman, happened when I woke up in hospital after a particularly heavy night of alcohol bingeing. I perceived this to be some kind of warning, fully acknowledging that I wouldnt always be so lucky as to be discovered (unconscious and vomiting on a deserted pavement late at night) and taken to A&E by a friend if I were to continue drinking myself into such oblivion. But the capacity to commit to an alcohol-free life was pretty much already present, that nights events merely providing the last piece of the jigsaw that, once complete, would see me waving goodbye to the Wine Witch for good.

For many people, however, taking the final step to cutting alcohol out of their life for good does not emerge as the result of such a frightening incident as being rushed to hospital, passed-out drunk and scraping the bottom of the barrel. For the vast majority, becoming alcohol-free is a lifestyle option that is borne out of an accumulation of growing fed-up with being hungover, regularly losing control to the point of acting in an embarrassing manner, piling the pounds on and feeling lethargic, anxious, and suffering from low-level depression. And because there is no wham moment where we know absolutely, categorically, forever that we need to stop what were doing, sticking to a sober lifestyle can easily fall by the wayside just as soon as the last regrettable drunken occasion has been forgotten.

Just as is often the way when embarking on a new diet (you know the scenario; shortly before departing on holiday you nip to town to purchase a bikini, pick one out that is perhaps slightly optimistic in terms of sizing and as you stare at the bulging flesh in the changing room mirror, the tiny pants digging into your muffin top and two boobs magically becoming four under the strain of the minuscule cups, you declare Thats it! Im going on a diet!), the moment of inspiration is incredibly forceful and real, only to waft away into a distant memory a few hours/days later when a cake presents itself before you, impossible to resist.

So exactly how can you ensure that a very real wish to extract yourself from the grip of an alcohol dependency (most likely bobbing back up to the surface of your thoughts following yet another embarrassing/shameful/hangover-inducing booze fest) can be transformed into a long lasting action plan to live (happily) alcohol-free?

Getting firmly into the land of alcohol-free living (and ensuring that you stay there without the Wine Witch luring you back into destructive old habits) requires a degree of forward planning. Knowing what emotions to expect once the old crutch has been kicked away, preparing for the potential pitfalls and learning how to work through cravings will all stand you in good stead when it comes to maintaining your alcohol-free lifestyle. Developing an alcohol dependency is very similar to getting involved with a thoroughly unsuitable partner. Your relationship began with excitement and passion but eventually dwindled into a tedious cycle of pleasure-seeking swiftly followed by a blanket of regret. We do not always recognise that someone is having a destructive effect on us at the start of a new relationship, and when we eventually realise this it can be extremely difficult to end things because we have grown emotionally dependent upon them. As for booze, that first glass is the longed-for rendezvous with Mr Unsuitable, after a day spent bogged down with the humdrum of domesticity and/or work. But we need to recognise the negative and destructive consequences that this relationship is having on our lives and find the courage to finally give Mr Unsuitable the boot.

Becoming sober and learning how to be happy with regards to your decision to live without booze amounts to so much more than merely pouring all the remaining wine in the house down the sink living as a non-drinker takes some getting used to, especially if the drinking has been protracted and heavy. Maintaining an alcohol-free approach means finding out who you really are beneath the falsity of booze and learning how to interact socially without your old alcoholic prop. It means experiencing raw emotion and discovering how to cope with negative situations without drinking the problem away.

Quitting alcohol can lead to uncomfortable truths coming to the fore; a relationship may not be all it appeared to be when under the influence of booze, underlying mental health issues such as depression or bi-polar disorder could suddenly become exposed having previously been disguised by the mood-altering effects of alcohol, and the emotions of guilt and shame arising as a result of erstwhile drunken behaviour may now demand attention, no longer so easily hidden with a constant stream of wine (or whatevers your poison). It is these wrinkles and creases which will need ironing out in the first few weeks and/or months of alcohol-free life. Ignoring deeper issues could result in the apple-cart of sobriety being upturned.

A whimsical notion of stopping drinking can quite easily never come to fruition, prevented from developing into something more concrete by not giving sufficient thought to how one might explain such a bold and (for many) radical lifestyle choice to friends and family. Its important to discover something that you will enjoy drinking as an acceptable alternative to alcohol, and a way to fill the sudden vast increase in spare time each evening. Without forward-planning, an initial rush of enthusiasm for a commitment to alcohol-free living can be quashed in no time at all, purely as a result of the individual in question not putting into place a viable plan of action and instead attempting to coast along exactly as before only minus the glass of something to hand.