Lucy Rocca - The Sober Revolution: Calling Time on Wine OClock

The Sober Revolution

Sarah Turner and Lucy Rocca

This book is dedicated to every woman out there for whom one drink is too many and a thousand is never enough.

Do you count down the minutes to wine oclock on a daily basis? Is a bottle of Pinot Grigio your friend at the end of a long hard day? If you want to give up being controlled and defined by alcohol then now is the time to join The Sober Revolution

Fed up of living in a fog of hangovers, lethargy and guilt from too much wine? Have you tried to cut down without success?

You are not alone. When it comes to alcohol, millions of people around the world find it hard to exercise moderation and become stuck in a vicious cycle of blame, guilt and using more alcohol as a way of coping.

The Sober Revolution looks at women and their relationships with alcohol, exploring the myths behind this socially acceptable yet often destructive habit. Rather than continuing the sad spiral into addiction it helps women regain control of their drinking and live happier, healthier lives.

Sarah Turner, cognitive behavioural therapist and addictions counsellor, and Lucy Rocca, founder of Soberistas.com, the popular social networking site for women who have successfully kicked the booze or would like to, give an insight into ways to find a route out of the world of wine.

The Sober Revolution will open your eyes to the dangers of social drinking and give you the tools you need to have a happy life without the wine. Read it now and call time on wine oclock forever.

Acknowledgements

I could not have achieved this, my long-standing dream of writing a book, without the kind, loving and ready-at-a-seconds notice support of my parents, Pam and Steve, and my sister Claire, who all stepped in to look after baby Lily whenever required.

Neither would this book have ever been finished if I had been without the encouragement and support of Sean, who believed in me from the moment we met despite the fact that on that night I was blind drunk.

Sean also provided me with one of the final pieces of my sober jigsaw, helping me realise, finally, that alcohol and I were not terribly well suited. For that moment of enlightenment I will always owe him.

To baby Lily, you cant read yet, but your arrival into my world has brought nothing but joy and happiness, and seeing your gorgeous little face each morning provides me with all the reasons Ill ever need to never drink again.

I also want to thank from the bottom of my heart, Gordon, a friend of over twenty years, who saved my life on the last night I drank alcohol.

And finally, to my ray of sunshine Isobel, for whom I wish Id found the strength and wisdom years earlier to quit drinking (thankfully for me, she has turned out to be an angel of epic proportions and I am incredibly lucky to call her my daughter) thank you Isobel, for everything (you know).

Lucy Rocca

I would like to dedicate this to my Michael husband, best friend and rock of twenty-seven years; thank you would never cover it all. Also my son Charles, whose sense of fair-play, courage and honesty inspires me daily. I am very lucky to have lived long enough sober to show them how much they both mean to me.

Sarah Turner

Sarah Turner

Lucy Rocca

Introduction
By Lucy Rocca

As she described to me the events of one particular night which had, like many others before it, descended into a drunken mess of staggering, screaming, self-pity and the subsequent stomach-lurching moments the morning after when, upon waking, the staccato memories had risen to the surface and she recalled some (definitely not all the blackouts were always severe) of the terrible things she had said and done, Carols voice was full of sad resignation. It was as though she was describing another persons life, someone whom she loved and cared for deeply but who she hadnt seen in a long time.

The summer barbeque had started out like any other; friends and family gathered for an afternoon of relaxation, good food and a few drinks in the warm sunshine. Carol, who in her own words was a greedy drunk, felt from the moment she arrived that there was only one real reason she was in attendance at this friends convivial get-together, and it came in three colours red, white and ros. Mingling amongst her friends, enjoying their company as well as the sensation of becoming slightly tipsy, Carol continued to fill her glass, gradually losing track of how much shed had.

Unsure of when or how things suddenly switched in her head, she was told the next day how she had, after consuming many large glasses of wine, launched into tirades and abusive diatribes aimed at anyone and everyone around her. Descending into a wild and drunken rage, Carol was eventually bundled into the car with her husband and two boys and carted off back home where she could sleep it off. Upon reaching the house, however, sleep was the last thing on her mind and before long the neighbours felt justified in calling the police, concerned over the fact that Carols two young sons were present in what appeared to be a domestic situation that was spinning rapidly out of all control.

In the mid-1990s when the barbecue incident occurred amidst numerous other regrettable drunken events, Carol was in her early thirties, mum of two sons and caught in a marriage that was heading to an unhappy close. Her successful career placed tough demands on her which, together with the juggling of her home life and the doomed relationship which would soon end in bitter divorce, resulted in an ever-increasing affection for the wine.

As I spoke to Carol about her experiences just a few weeks before the completion of this book, it was eminently clear that I was in conversation with an articulate, confident and sensible woman who doted on her family and valued her life, and all those who featured in it, highly. This is someone, now in her early fifties, who has recently taken up martial arts, embarked on a counselling course, has lost three stone, looks the best she has in decades and is bursting with optimism and hope for the future.

Carols story of alcohol dependency is one which is not, sadly, uncommon. Launching into a drinking career in her twenties which took a sharp turn for the worse a decade down the line when her marriage hit the rocks and she was faced with the crippling loneliness and hardship which result from a difficult and acrimonious divorce, Carol was never a woman who could just have one. As soon as the cork was popped she had her eye on what was left would there be enough? What if it ran out? Could she justify a trip to the shop for some other imagined necessity which would enable her to slip an extra bottle into the supermarket basket oh, so innocently, just like everyone else does?

Holding down a demanding job in which she managed hundreds of people, Carol desperately fought to maintain the faade of the she can have it all 1980s mantra to friends and family. She was the life and soul, the consummate party girl, who every so often went too far and fell over the precipice into drunk and out of control.

For many who find themselves caught up in the vicious grip of an alcohol dependency, the denial is so much a part of what they are living through that it is all too easy to imagine there are no real problems caused by their drinking to excess. It is ever tempting to point at others and berate their immoral lifestyle and the effect it has on them and their families, whilst simultaneously wrapping ourselves in a blanket of pretence and ignoring what we are doing to our own little worlds.