Ashley Willis - Peace Pirates: Conquering the Beliefs and Behaviors that Steal Your Treasure in Motherhood

Key Principle: All moms must brave the various storms of motherhood, and they can experience peace through these storms when they choose to hold tightly to the Lord.

I think the hardest part for me is always worrying if Im forming my kids correctly. I want the best for them. I worry constantly about being too strict or not strict enough. I also worry about the example I set as a wife for my daughter and son. I so badly want them to have a wonderful Godly relationship.

Kayleesue L., married with two girls and one boy

I will never forget the day when I thought I was officially losing my mind. And I dont mean it in the charming, Oh, this crazy pregnancy brain or Man, there is so much on my plate these days kind of way. I am talking downright cray-crayor whatever young kids are calling it these days. I had no idea that rapper DMX was foreshadowing my future as a mother in his nineties hip-hop classic Yall Gon Make Me Lose My Mind (Up in Here, Up in Here).

I was acting a fool with my four rambunctious boys more than Id like to admit. And I will never forget when I realized that we were becoming a ten-testicle home, as my husband loves to say. I seriously almost passed out when I saw yet another little baby penis on the ultrasound screen during my fourth pregnancy (and yes, I used the p word, which is most often the word of the day in my house). Between my boys constant arguing, my requests that seemed to fall on deaf ears, and the older boys teaching my youngest an additional funny term for his genitalia, I was done.

I was so completely frustrated by the state of my position as mother and the behavior of my children that I found myself shutting down. I couldnt utter another pointless instruction or remind them for the four hundred and thirty-seventh time that we dont say, Deez nutz! at the top of our lungs in public (or anywhere else for that matter). Enough already!

Please dont misunderstand my candor, friend. I know it is a tremendous blessing to be a mother, and I thank God every day for my crazy kiddos. I just wish that the good Little House on the Prairie moments outweighed the bad Roseanne ones. Seriously! Not long ago my then-seventeen-month-old was dipping Oreos in the toilet and eating them, for crying out loud! The craziness is real, and some daysokay, most daysI feel in over my head. I feel like Ive become a pirate mom just trying to navigate the raging seas of raising my precious little mateys, stealing chocolate from my kids Halloween candy stash, barking off orders like its my job, and bumping around the house in a sleep-deprived stupor until I gulp down enough coffee. Yeah. I may or may not have said, Make haste, scallywag! a time or two. Okay, it hasnt gone that faryet.

Recently, my youngest sported a legit eye patch for months due to a lazy eye. Not to mention, my other boys are obsessed with pirate swords. We even dressed up like pirates for a Disney cruise with our extended family. My eldest son recently told me that he thinks I have an obsession with pirate jackets, and you know, looking at my closet, I think theres a lot of truth to that statement. I mean, whats not to love about some lace-trimmed sleeves and military-style buttons adorning a blazer? I love it! So, yeah, were pretty much a pirate family.

But in reality, pirates arent fun or even fashionable. Pirates take from others. And when I allow myself to morph into a pirate momletting life toss me about like a ship at seaI enable certain thoughts, circumstances, and people to plunder the peace in my heart and home. And consequently, our home becomes a topsy-turvy place lacking comfort, understanding, stillness, assurance, and most important, peace.

Our family spends a lot of long imaginative days at sea clanging plastic swords and finding buried treasure because it seems like the thing to do, but there are some days when I feel the heaviness of the playacting closing in on us. The reality of trying to steer clear of the chaos and avoid losing something valuable (like my mind!) throws us aroundand it feels as if my peace and sanity are tossed overboard in the process. And I become even more pirate-y, if you know what I mean. Except I dont have an intimidating eye patch and my weapons arent plastic pirate swords. My weapons come in the form of impatience, harsh words, eye rolls, frustration, and sighs toward the ones I love the most. I lash outlike a crazy pirateat my precious little mateys. Then, I feel guilty, defeated, and depleted.

Were all emotionally seasick and desperately in search of the peace that was lost at sea. This is where Peace Pirates comes in. I want us to reclaim our hearts and our homes rather than giving them away to an elusive pirate that steals from us in the form of emotions, time, and other thief-like assaults on focus and frame of mind. Any other pirate mamas with me?