Jenn Ranter Hook - Replanted: Faith-Based Support for Adoptive and Foster Families

Replanted

FAITH-BASED SUPPORT FOR
ADOPTIVE AND FOSTER FAMILIES

Jenn Ranter Hook, Joshua N. Hook,
and Mike Berry

Templeton Press
300 Conshohocken State Road, Suite 500
West Conshohocken, PA 19428
www.templetonpress.org

2019 by Jenn Ranter Hook, Joshua N. Hook, and Mike Berry

All rights reserved. This book may not be reproduced, in whole or in part, including illustrations, in any form (beyond that copying permitted by Sections 107 and 108 of the U.S. Copyright Law and except by reviewers for the public press), without written permission from the publishers.

Unless otherwise indicated, all scripture quotations are taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version, NIV. Copyright 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved worldwide. www.zondervan.com The NIV and New International Version are trademarks registered in the United States Patent and Trademark Office by Biblica, Inc.

Set in Adobe Caslon Pro by Gopa and Ted2, Inc.

Library of Congress Control Number: 2019930745
ISBN: 978-1-59947-537-0 (pbk: alk. paper)
ISBN: 978-1-59947-538-7 (eBook)

This paper meets the requirements of ANSI/NISO Z39.48-1992
(Permanence of Paper).

A catalogue record for this book is available from the Library of Congress.

19 20 21 22 23 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1

Printed in the United States of America.

To the Replanted leadership team in Chicago, who pioneered and helped
breathe life and vision into this ministrythis book is a reflection and
extension of what you helped to create.

To my parents, Fred and Laurie; my brother, Craig; and my sister-in
law, Vicki, who have been my biggest cheerleaders in life.

And finally, to my husband, who encouraged me to write this book.

JENN RANTER HOOK

To my wife, JennI love you and am proud of you!

JOSHUA N. HOOK

To the amazing, beautiful people who are our support community:
theres no way we could do this journey without you!

MIKE BERRY

Contents

Acknowledgments

I N 2011, I was introduced to a pastor named Gregory Whittaker at a farewell party for a friend. After learning that I worked as a therapist in foster care, he asked what seemed like a simple question: What do you see as the churchs role in supporting our families? Gregory, I bet you had no idea what you were getting yourself into, but thanks for believing in me and advocating for our church to actively love and serve our adoptive and foster community. Replanted exists because of you. Church of the Resurrection, thanks for saying yes and for faithfully praying for and supporting our adoptive and foster care community.

I want to give a huge shout out to my original team in Chicago that helped pioneer and breathe life into the Replanted Ministry at its inception. Scott and Sarah Roney, Mike Swihart, Christie Otts, and Michelle Peterson: Your dedication, passion, and vision to support the families in our community through the local church has brought us to where we are today.

Our team of dedicated leaders and volunteers has consistently shown up and served as the hands and feet of Jesus to our families. You are the heartbeat of this ministry. Thank you for all the ways you lead and love our families, from launching groups, attending meetings, setting up tables and chairs, playing with and investing in the kids, and faithfully praying for, sitting with, and listening to the hearts of our parents. There are so many people to thank for their dedication, leadership, and service: Hollee Ball, Currey and JJ Blandford, Melissa Harms, Mark Hawkinson, Lisa Jarot, Laura Leonard, Sonja Shogren, Christine Stahl, Jessica Stoffer, David Vosburg, Chris Wilson, and David Wrigglesworth. You are true rock stars.

To the Replanted leadership, group facilitators, hosts, and mentors around the country: Its been an honor to share this passion and calling in life with you. Thank you for dedicating your lives to sit with our families in both the joy and the pain, mentoring and investing in the lives of our children, and being kingdom influencers.

To all the children that forever changed my life while I worked at the Youth Service Bureau: This ministry was created for you. Thank you for trusting me with your hearts and your stories.

To all the Replanted families weve had the privilege of supporting and journeying with: Thank you for your faithfulness in this journey, even when its hard. It brings us great joy to do life together, to hold one anothers arms up when we feel weary, and to celebrate the joys with fierce abandon. We love you dearly and are cheering so hard for you and your precious kiddos.

To Mike and Kristin, Andrew and Michelle, and Jami K: Thanks for being kindred spirits in ministry. Its been quite the ride, and Im grateful for your support and partnership.

To Susan and the team at Templeton Press: Thank you for believing in this book and taking a chance on us. We are so grateful for your support.

I want to give a huge thanks to my mentors. Patmarie Hawkinson, thanks for intentionally investing in my life, letting me share vulnerably, and being my champion. Im forever grateful for your guidance, prayer, hospitality, and countless hours around the campfire. Karen Miller, thanks for being my leadership coach. Your encouragement, wisdom, and guidance has been so valuable and helped shape who I am today.

To my high school teachers and coaches Mr. Buma and Mr.Roukema: My course in life was altered because of you. Thank you for challenging me to be my best, believing in me when I didnt believe in myself, seeing what I couldnt see, coaching me, and cheering for me. Thanks for seeing the real me. I am where I am today because of you.

To my friends who are more like family in Canada and Wheaton: Thanks for doing life with me. You have taught me the value of deep, genuine, grace-filled relationships. To Karen, Paige, and my 868 girls, I love you! To Brenda and Randy, thanks for being like second parents to me and encouraging my competitive nature. To Aunt Trish, my hockey aunt, you are simply the best!

To my crazy, ridiculous, goofball family: Who would have thought a dairy farmers daughter would write a book someday! Ranter is on this book as a reflection of the impact you have had on my life. I miss you all the time. Mom and Dad, you always knew God had big plans for my life. Thanks for supporting that, even though it has led me far away from doing life with you. Craig, little broski, you have taught me so much! Thanks for being my friend and for fiercely protecting me.

And finally, to my husband, Josh Hook, who encouraged me to write this book. I seriously would never have done this without your support. When we first met, I was terrified to let you read anything I wrote. Look how far weve come. Im so blessed to be married to you. Thanks for so fiercely believing in me. You were worth the wait.

Jenn Ranter Hook

CHAPTER 1

Caring for Vulnerable Children
Is Challenging and Beautiful

The beginning is always today.
MARY WOLLSTONECRAFT

A s I (Jenn) begin to write this book, my mind wanders back to one of our Parents Night Out events, which is an event our ministry organizes so that adoptive and foster parents can have a night out to themselves and our kiddos can build relationships with one another. We get a group of volunteers together and come up with a bunch of fun activities for the children so that the parents can get a few hours to go out alone. One husband told me that he and his wife were planning to have dinner at the local Olive Garden, and we laughed, agreeing on our mutual love for the unlimited salad and breadsticks. Another couple was planning to see a movie with a few friends. They hadnt been out to see a movie inwell, they couldnt remember the last time. Another couple hadnt planned anything. They chuckled and said that maybe they would just go home and take a nap. I wasnt sure if they were joking or not. But one thing was clear, our parents needed this time to recharge and care for themselves, and for some, our offering of Parents Night Out was the only opportunity they would get.