Dr. Ed Slack - Two Legged Snakes: Understanding and Handling Manipulative People

Understanding and Handling
Manipulative People

Dr. Ed Slack

Simple Truth Publishing

Two Legged Snakes: Understanding and Handling Manipulative People by Dr. Ed Slack

Two Legged Snakes: Understanding and Handling Manipulative People. Copyright 2010 by Dr. Ed Slack. Illustrations Copyright 2010 by Donny Smutz, as noted. Illustrations Copyright 2010 by Sherard Jackson, as noted.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission from the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews. For more information, contact: Simple Truth Publishing, P.O. Box 292828, Nashville, TN 37229 USA

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Disclaimer: No references or illustrations in this book are intended to represent any actual person or event, except when specifically noted.

First Edition / epub

Publishers Cataloging-in-publication Data

(Prepared by The Donohue Group, Inc.)

Slack, Ed (Edward G.)

Two legged snakes : understanding and handling manipulative people / Ed Slack. -- 1st ed.

p. : ill. ; cm.

Includes bibliographical references.

ISBN-13: 978-0-9825514-2-4

ISBN-10: 0-9825514-1-X

1. Manipulative behavior. 2. Control (Psychology) 3. Interpersonal relations.
I. Title.

Designed by Patrick Schlafer
www.pschlafer.com

Copy edit and proofreading by Ms. Gail Kearns
www.topressandbeyond.com

Printed in China

This book is dedicated to all the people who read it and put it to good use.

Thanks for making the world a less snaky place.

Who and what we trust is an automatic and for most, a largely unexamined process. We receive thousands of messages each day, tugging at us to buy this, believe that, and support this or that view. Contrary to all these choices is the fact that most people know little about how to decipher the false from the true, the manipulative from the sincere, and the ill-advised from the functional. This gap was the motivation for writing Two Legged Snakes: Understanding and Handling Manipulative People.

I began writing in the usual academic manner but Shel Silversteins The Missing Piece Meets the Big O kept coming to mind. Hundreds of times during my years as a psychologist, Ive reached for my well-worn copy and had clients leaf through it. In five minutes, this short illustrated book got across points about relationship dynamics that often took hours of expensive talk. Its words and pictures told the simple truth in a humorous and memorable style. I was inspired to take a new approach.

Using words and pictures together causes the reader to use more of his or her brain than text alone. In technical terms, this is called multi-modal processing, and it has been shown to help many people understand and remember more effectively, particularly those of us with a touch of dyslexia or a bit of ADD. Our topic, though quite serious, is approached in the lighthearted manner inspired by Mr. Silverstein, who proved that meaningful books dont have to be a words-only experience and can be fun as well.

The greatest single factor determining your level of happiness and success is who you listen to and who you trust. Even if you have been fortunate to grow up in an environment surrounded by functional, trustworthy people, you are still not safe from those who actively use deception, rhetorical techniques, and symbolic manipulation to cause you to act against your own best interests. Every day the goal of Two Legged Snakes is to get into your wallet, get into your pants, and get into your head. They will sell you things you dont need, break your heart, steal from you with a smile, and garner your support for agendas that benefit them at ridiculous costs to you.

Although Two Legged Snakes currently come in more varieties then ever before, they arent a new problem. According to Christian, Islamic and Jewish traditions, mans first decision-making responsibilities began with Eve letting herself get talked into eating the fruit of the Tree of Knowledge; the one fruit she was forbidden by God to eat.

Why did she do it? She had it made living in the Garden of Eden (a very nice place). She was living with Adam (a great guy by most accounts), all her needs were tended to, she lived in peace with all Gods creatures and she had eternal life. Why would she eat the forbidden fruit and then share it with Adam and get them both kicked out of paradise? Because a serpent talked her into it. She was tempted and gave in to snaky manipulation. And this serpent, by many reputable accounts, walked on two legs. Even if youre not a religious person, every day you face the same dilemma Eve faced:

To bite or not to bite, that is the question.

It makes sense that major world religions would put this story at the forefront of their traditions. It highlights one of our most important tasks as human beings: to choose well and not be deceived by snaky influences. If we are to do our best to avoid the pitfalls and disasters that are the results of poor decisions, we must learn the techniques and appearances of those who would manipulate us and make our choices clear of their influence. We need to be aware of Two Legged Snakes and their methods.

All of us have a snaky side and weve all heard its voice trying to influence us. But our general intent is to resolve problems fairly and treat others as wed like to be treated. Being imperfect, we slip up sometimes.

And then we feel really bad, say were sorry and honestly try to do better next time. Our family life, work life and relationships going well are whats important, not the snaky pursuits of janky affairs, deceived loved ones and ill gotten gains. Two Legged Snakes commonly deceive their partners simply for the feeling of power they get from not getting caught.

Bipedal Snakes can be charming, talented, entertaining, attractive and above all, persuasive. Even though its often hard to believe, their focus is to achieve their snaky goals no matter what. The resulting consequences range from personal discomfort to international disaster.