Kitty Martini - Thank You for Firing Me!: How to Catch the Next Wave of Success After You Lose Your Job

Thank You
for Firing Me!

How to Catch the Next Wave of Success
After You Lose Your Job

Kitty Martini and Candice Reed

STERLING and the distinctive Sterling logo are registered trademarks of Sterling Publishing Co., Inc.

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Martini, Kitty.
Thank you for firing me! : how to catch the next wave of success after you lose your job / Kitty Martini & Candice Reed.
p. cm.
ISBN 978-1-4027-6956-6
1. Career changes. 2. Job hunting. 3. Vocational guidance. I. Reed, Candice. II.
Title.
HF5384.M37 2010
650.14--dc22

2009034298

10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1

Published by Sterling Publishing Co., Inc.
387 Park Avenue South, New York, NY 10016
2010 by Kitty Martini and Candice Reed
Distributed in Canada by Sterling Publishing
c/o Canadian Manda Group, 165 Dufferin Street
Toronto, Ontario, Canada M6K 3H6
Distributed in the United Kingdom by GMC Distribution Services
Castle Place, 166 High Street, Lewes, East Sussex, England BN7 1XU
Distributed in Australia by Capricorn Link (Australia) Pty. Ltd.
P.O. Box 704, Windsor, NSW 2756, Australia

All rights reserved

Sterling ISBN 978-1-4027-6956-6

Sterling ISBN 13: 978-1-4027-8379-1

For information about custom editions, special sales, premium and
corporate purchases, please contact Sterling Special Sales
Department at 800-805-5489 or specialsales@sterlingpublishing.com.

Contents

PART ONE
Soul Searching: What to Do After You Wipe Out

PART TWO
Job Searching: Dive into Cool Careers

Chapter Thirteen: Treading Water in Creative
Industries: The Art of Selling Art

Conclusion

Resource Guide: Catching the Next Wave of
Success After You Lose Your Job

A warm and fuzzy thank you to our agent, Sammie Justesen, who saw the possibilities in our idea and how this book could make a difference for millions of people who have lost their livelihoods as well as their sense of humor. Special thanks to Meredith Hale, Tricia Medved, Kate Zimmerman, and Scott Amerman, our editors at Sterling, for bringing this book to life. A big shout-out to our first copyeditor, Maria Foster Kirkpatrick, for her sharp eye and observations. Thanks to Ralph T. Reed for getting us through our first three chapterssorry about all the martinis you had to consume. Heartfelt kudos to Crista McClure-Swan and At Home Magazine for being the catalyst that brought us together. Thank you so much to Kim Rahilly who gave us some of our greatest resources. The following smart people, writers, journalists, and editors offered their knowledge and time, and we sincerely thank you: Valerie Fanning, Ciaran Clayton, Ken McCabe, Edwina Villegas, Tina Reed, Linda Tieman, Karen Drew, William T. Reed, Kehau Cerizo, Lindsey Mead McCrea, John Lang, and of course, Mark Walker. And lastly, to everyone who has hired and fired us over the years, teaching us that we were not meant to be truck drivers/funeral directors/go-go-dancers/ weight loss counselors/birthday party clowns or any of the other shortlived positions we have held, and instead made us realize that we were meant to be anticareer experts! Thank You for Firing Us!

Kitty Martini

Id like to send a million thanks to Lisa M., who fired me from my copywriting job. If you hadnt fired me, I wouldnt have had an idea and an opportunity to help the thousands of people who have lost their jobs when the economy tanked. And wow, being unemployed sure gave me plenty of time to write this book! A big fat mucho gracias and merci beaucoup goes to my friend and coauthor, Candice Reed, whose hilarious wit, talent, and her commando ADD skills helped this book materialize. Im ever so thankful to my funny and fabulous Italian mom, Ginny the Shark Aradio, who gave me daily shots of go for it, Kid! and magically turned my lemons into lemon drop martinis. Thank you Alexa and Kristof, my awesome kids, who ran the house while Mom was writing, and Thierry for your support, encouragement, and keeping those kids out of my hair. A happy, fluffy boatload of heartfelt appreciation goes to Darla, Daria, and Rick, my supercool siblings, who taught me that stupid jokes and writing could be a career option. Kudos to my besties who cheered from the sidelines: Malibu Mike, Eddie G., Windy, and Jonathan. And lastly, a million more thanks to John Johnny D Del Gaizo for being my muse and sparkplug for every idea that spews out of my brain and lands on stage or in a book.

Candice Reed

Without Kitty and her unique attitude and approach to life this book may never have been born. Her dry wit and crazy stories are greatly appreciated and well suited to a writer such as myself. Thank you for bringing me along for the ride my friend.

I am indebted to my talented partners in the writing community who empathize with me when I piss and moan about this thing called writingRuth Marvin Webster and Heather Anderson. Thanks for being there when I need you. Much appreciation to all of my former newspaper and magazine editors, but especially to Maria Foster for teaching me how to be a real journalistI will try to remember the proper usage of an apostrophe.

For all my friends and relatives who were surprised that I became a writer but are proud of me now that Im going to be semifamous Craig and Carolee Engstrand, the Boneys, the Olsons, and all of those Reedsa million thanks for listening to my stories and putting up with me over the years.

To Cathy Agrella, my friend and angelyou were my inspiration as I wrote the pages on reinventing yourself. You taught me long ago that its possible for anyone to make a change for the better and be a success. You are missed daily.

To my parents with love: Ransom and Caroline Yarnall and Fred Ferguson for giving me a sense of humor and self-confidence. Mom, thanks for cheering me on and supporting me through hard times as well as the good. I couldnt have done this without you. And to my grandmother, Lois Post, for sitting me in front of the Olivetti and reading my first written words and believing in meyou will forever be my inspiration!

And to my sisters, Julie Laubach, Valerie Fanning, Edwina Villegas, Cheryl Harper, Ciaran Clayton, Durenda Benton Tomczyk, Ladies with Gusto, and the GHS Lunch Ladieswe will always be friends no matter what! Thank you!

It is with a mothers love that I thank my talented and beautiful children, Aja Renee and Samuel Thomas, for their support and encouragement and for taking it in stride that I would succeed. No one loves their children more than I!

And finally, a few sappy words dedicated to the man who told me that I had the talent to be a writer and to go for it, my love: my husband, Ralph. To be able to still make me laugh every day no matter what is happening in the world around us is the greatest gift I will ever receive. I am grateful for every moment I spend with you, and when all those strangers tell me Im lucky to be married to you, I have to admit: theyre right. Je vous aimerai toujours!

Part One
Soul Searching:
What to Do After You Wipe Out

If youre not fired up with enthusiasm
youll be fired with enthusiasm

Vince Lombardi

S o, youve been fired. Take a deep breath. Now let it out slowly. You packed your coffee mug and cleared your desk, feeling rejected, embarrassed, and freaked out over what happened. Okay, go ahead and stomp your feet if you have to, and shout, Hey! Its not fair! But be careful, or someone might call the cops. Being unemployed and in jail is not a good thing.