Gina Gallagher - Shut Up About Your Perfect Kid: A Survival Guide for Ordinary Parents of Special Children

Praise for SHUT UP ABOUT YOUR PERFECT KID

Know, work with, or love a child with special needs? If so, Gina Gallagher and Patricia Konjoians SHUT UP ABOUT YOUR PERFECT KID is the latest must-read book on the subject. The sisters, whose wit and delivery could have landed them a gig on the stand-up circuit, share facts and funny stories about raising kids with disabilities while providing practical advice and identifying helpful resources. Youll laugh, youll cry, youll learn a lot about living well with challenge. Buy a copy for yourself and two or three more for your friends with perfect kids!

KATE McLAUGHLIN, author of Mommy Im Still in Here: One Familys Journey with Bipolar Disease

SHUT UP ABOUT YOUR PERFECT KID is the perfect antidote to a society obsessed with perfection. It was written by two sisters who both have children with unique challenges. Gina Gallagher and Patricia Konjoian have created an honest, humorous, and touching book that will make you laugh and cry, but most of all it will make you reevaluate how you look at other people in this world. Their journey is similar to that of many parents who have been filled with conflicting feelings about their children. But at the end of the day, instead of seeing their childrens differences, they see their determination and spirit. Its that determination and spirit that has changed their lives in every way. Its also what they would like the rest of the world to embrace. This book is a breath of fresh air to parents of kids with all sorts of abilities.

TRACY ANGLADA, executive director of BPChildren and author of Intense Minds: Through the Eyes of Young People with Bipolar Disorder

This survival guide is a must-read for families of children with emerging and existing mental health conditions. Not only does this book provide highly practical advice, but it infuses that advice with real-life stories of families who have faced unthinkable challenges and come out on top. It offers hope to every family who has faced the dark side of stigma and the struggle of securing effective services and supports for their child. Families who read this book will truly understand that they are not alone. The road can be long and hard, but this book reminds us that on our journey, humor provides a powerful role in the struggle. Ordinary families will find themselves reading and rereading this guide as they come to appreciate the beauty of their unique and special child.

DARCY GRUTTADARO, director of the NAMI National Child and Adolescent Action Center

Thank you, Gina and Patty, for reminding the world that our most cherished human qualities, courage and resilience among them, can never be captured by a test score or grade on a report card. Your book, your message, and your Movement of Imperfction could not have arrived at a better time. Thanks to you, countless numbers of people, children and adults alike, will come to see their differences in a hopeful new light.

MARK KATZ, PhD, clinical and consulting psychologist, San Diego, California, and author of On Playing a Poor Hand Well

With truly masterful use of humor as a coping strategy, SHUT UP ABOUT YOUR PERFECT KID authors Gina Gallagher and Patricia Konjoian address the challenges, the heartbreak, and the touching victories of parenting children with disabilities today. The book is a valuable and insightful resource for any family member or friend of a child with special needs. It conveys a wealth of practical information with a warmth and compassion that helps parents realize they are not alone.

DEIRDRE E. LOGAN, PhD, psychologist, Childrens Hospital Boston, and assistant professor of psychology, Harvard Medical School

Anyone who has ever laughed while raising a child will love this book! Gina and Patricia really find the humor in special needs parentingand they validate us all.

SUSAN SENATOR, author of Making Peace with Autism and The Autism Moms Survival Guide

To all the special parents,

grandparents, and guardians

who feel sad, overwhelmed, and isolated.

You are not alone.

And to our own special parents,

Vi and Tony Terrasi,

who remind us of that every day.

PART 1:

PART 2:

PART 3:

PART 4:

PART 5:

16.

Welcome to Shut Up About Your Perfect Kid.

First, the good news: I really like this book. Now, the bad news: I really dont like the title, and only partially because I dont love the words shut up. The main reason I dont like the title is that this book really isnt about other peoples kids being perfect. This book is about the journey of two momsone whose child is diagnosed with Aspergers syndrome, the other whose child is diagnosed with bipolar disorderas they struggle to understand their kids differences and keep their heads above water in a world that still doesnt understand individual differences very well at all. Its not easy out there for kids with social, emotional, and behavioral challenges, and its not easy for their parents, either. These two moms (and their kids) somehow find their way, though, and this book is about their journey.

The other good news is that the wisdom they gather along the way is packed into this book as well. Though they are more favorably inclined toward psychiatric diagnoses than I am, theyve made no attempt to transform themselves into mental health professionals in telling their stories. One of the best parts of the book is that these two moms sound like well, two moms. And two very funny moms at that. So youre going to laugh (a lot), and cry (a little), and youre going to hope for the best, and youre going to pray that someone can help their kids, and best of all youre going to know that youre not alone.

So if you were hoping for a dry, predictable reading experience, Im quite certain youve selected the wrong book. Kids with social, emotional, and behavioral challenges arent dry and predictable, so hang on to your hat and bring along some tissues.

Finally, if you were hoping for a long foreword, wrong book again. You need to start reading!

Ross W. Greene, PhD, author of The Explosive Child and Lost at School; founder of Lives in the Balance (livesinthebalance.org)

WHEN WE BEGAN the journey of writing this book, we had no idea where it would lead us, though we certainly had our share of fantasies. We dreamed about making entrances at our next high school reunions (So what if weve gained fifteen pounds since graduation! We wrote a book!); jetting off to exciting places (Pat, maybe well go to Chicago and meet Jerry Springer); even amassing a world-class financial empire (Should we build the Shut Up Industries skyscraper in Boston or in Providence?).

But neither of us evernot in our wildest dreamsimagined the riches this book would bring us.

To be honest, we werent even looking to write this book. We were looking for therapy; a way to cope with the challenges and frustrations of raising daughters with