Elizabeth Freedman - Work 101: Learning the Ropes of the Workplace Without Hanging Yourself

Contents

SECTION I:
Business Etiquette at Work

Unspoken Rule #1: Have Them at Hello
When It Comes to Making a Great First Impression at Work, Good Things Do Not Come to Those Who Wait

Unspoken Rule #2: Your Fork Is Not a Shovel, Your Knife Is Not a Saw
Dazzle Them at Business Lunches, Dinners, and Anyplace Else Where a Fork Is Required

Unspoken Rule #3: The Workplace Meeting Is Your Careers Secret Weapon
Leverage This Opportunity to Showcase Your Strengths to an Audience

SECTION II:
Relationships at Work

Unspoken Rule #4: Dont Assume You Said (or Wrote) What You Meant
Sound as Good as You Look by Mastering the Art of Business Communication

Unspoken Rule #5: Dont NetworkBuild Relationships Instead
Learn How to Build Relationships On and Off the Job to Ensure Lasting Career Success

Unspoken Rule #6: Your Boss Holds the Keys to the Kingdom
Do What It Takes to Build the Relationship that Matters Most to Your Career

SECTION III:
You at Work

Unspoken Rule #7: Climb the Corporate Ladder with Subtlebut ShamelessSelf-Promotion
Learn Why It Takes More than Doing Great Work to Get Promoted on the Job

Unspoken Rule #8: Burning Bridges Is for Arsonists
Leave Your Job with Classand Take Intelligent Risks to Land Your Next Job

The Last Unspoken Rule
It Isnt What You KnowIts What You Do with What You Know that Counts

To new professionals everywhere
may you find happiness and fulfillment in your own careers

Acknowledgments

I am grateful to so many for ensuring the successful outcome of Work 101. Many thanks to Talia Cohenyour insights and commitment to this project were instrumental. To Danielle Perez at Bantam Dellthank you for your expertise, insight, and terrific enthusiasm for Work 101, and to Patricia Ballantyne, her assistant, who truly puts the professional in New Professional. Many thanks to family, friends, clients, and colleagues for taking the time to read and review chapters from this book, including: David Roberts, Kevin Giglinto, John Micalizzi, Alex Goor, Lauren Schiffman, Alison Clark, and Barbara Limmer. Additional thanks and much appreciation go to the many New Professionals and their managers who agreed to be interviewed for this book, and to even more friends and family members who were informal editors, sounding boards, and nonstop cheerleaders for this effort. Finally, my deepest appreciation for Andrew, the professional who inspires me and so many others every day.

The Unspoken Rules: Why Business Savvy Matters to Your Career

Nigel Tufnel, lead guitarist,This Is Spinal Tap

E VEN IF YOU HAVENT SEEN THE HILARIOUS MOVIEThis Is Spinal Tap, its worth mentioning that Nigel Tufnel, one of the lead characters, is about as dumb as a doorknob. But when it comes to learning the ropes at work, this aging, spandex-wearing rocker is right on the money: There really is a fine line between clever and stupid, between workplace intellect and ignorance, and ultimately, between career success and setbacks.

For instance, consider Marci, age 24, an entry-level analyst at a top-tier consulting firm. A magna cum laude college graduate, former student government president, and volunteer for Habitat for Humanity, Marci seems like an employers dream, right? Rightexcept that Marci was recently admonished for her poor work ethic and received a less-than-stellar performance review from her boss.

Turns out that Marci had arrived late at the office on a few occasionsonly because things had been slow and there hadnt been that much for her to doand the boss had noticed. Too bad he hadnt also noticed all of the times shed stayed late at the office, come in early, and answered emails from her laptop at home.

Unfortunately, Marci learned the hard way that most supervisors still want you at your desk by 9:00 am, slow day or not. She didnt know that even though she was terrific 90 percent of the time, it was the other 10 percent that her boss seemed to remember when it came time for her performance review. In other words, she learned that ultimately, there is a very fine line between success and failure in the eyes of her bossafter all, it only took a few late mornings to undo the goodwill she had been working hard to build up for so many months.

The Fine Lines of the Workplace

Shes not the only one to learn that lesson. The truth is that many of us make mistakes in the early stages of our careers. It isnt until weve been overlooked for an opportunity, passed by for a promotion, or even scolded by a supervisor that we begin to get a cluebut by then, the damage is already done.

The reality is that the workplace is filled with fine linesfor instance, when do persistence and follow-up become pesky and irritating to the boss? When is our desire to improve things viewed by our coworkers as a criticism of the status quo or seen as arrogance on our part that we know better than they do? Knowing how to stay on the right side of these, and many other, equations requires an understanding of the rules of the workplaceand how to succeed within them.

What You Dont Say Says Plenty

How can you begin to grasp some of these unspoken rules, and how can you successfully navigate them? Consider Silent Messages, a 1971 study conducted by Dr. Albert Mehrabian, a psychologist and UCLA professor and pioneer in the field of verbal and nonverbal communication. What he discovered was that people are influenced less by what we say than by how we say it, noting that 93 percent of our impact comes from things other than the words we use.

What does this mean for you and your career? It means that what you dont sayincluding your dress, appearance, body language, and morecan actually say a lot about you. In fact, it can shout out loud and clear from the mountain-tops exactly who you are.

What does your business behaviorincluding your communication, dress, and interpersonal skillsreally say? Does it reinforce who you say you are, or does it reveal something else?

The Problem with Business Know-How

Heres the problem: Unless some kind soul is willing to enlighten you, you often dont know the answers to the questions Ive just presented. And as a result, you dont even know that youre making mistakes in the first place. After all, you cant possibly be as clueless as someone who wipes his hands on a tablecloth during a business lunch, or dresses up like a cowgirl for a job interview, for Petes sake! Youre not that bad, you tell yourself, so why worry?

More often than not, we never imagine that we could be the ones with the problem. We never think that were the cocky ones, the annoying ones, the ones who are anything less than fabulous. Whether its talking too loudly on your cell phone or hogging the left lane on the highway, the reality is that were remarkably clueless about our own deficienciesand even more so when it comes to the workplace.

Its time to take responsibility into our own hands and give ourselves the clue that nobody else will. Whether the problem seems smalllike the fact that our table manners could use some workor biglike the fact that we cant seem to get along with our boss or were rubbing folks the wrong way during a job interviewthe key is to identify what isnt working and fix it. After all, with more than 39 million twentysomethings in the United States today, according to the U.S. Census Bureau, there is no shortage of competition, and its smart to use every opportunity to shine and give yourself an extra edge when it comes to your career. You dont want to lose opportunities because you made people unsure, uncomfortable, or simply grossed them out over lunch at the office.