Andy Heidel - The Cocktail Guide to the Galaxy: A Universe of Unique Cocktails from the Celebrated Doctor Who Bar

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For the Ambassadors, Space Friends, and other regulars of The Way Station and thirsty nerds everywhere

All cocktails contained within this book have been field-tested by some of the best bartenders in Brooklyn, the most amazing regulars at TWS, and also some random people who just happened to be at the bar when I was inspired to invent a cocktail. This book has been rated MA for strong drinks and language.

The Geek shall inherit the Earth.

Hawkins: The pellet with the poisons in the flagon with the dragon; the vessel with the pestle has the brew that is true.

Griselda: Just remember that.

The Court Jester, 1955

Kirk: Know anything about the radiation surge?

Chekov: Only the size of my head.

Kirk: I know what you mean.

Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country, 1991

BY CHLO SEHR

Lets be very clear about one thing: when I walk into The Way Station, the bar that my friend Anders owns, I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT ANYONE IS TALKING ABOUT. I have many friends there who are wonderful people. We have great conversations about the events of the day, we gripe about New York the way New Yorkers do. Then, someone makes a reference to any one of a zillion sci-fi films/TV shows/comic books and they may as well be speaking Swahili, as far as Im concerned.

Its possible I would never have wandered into The Way Station at all, if not for the fact that Anders is my best friend. We met years ago when we were both bartenders at a restaurant in the neighborhood. He was already trying to open The Way Station, a grueling two-year process that is a story for another day. Luckily, our boss was an excellent example of what not to do as an employer, which drove Anders to draft pages and pages of helpful suggestions. Even though they fell on deaf ears (blind eyes?) then, Im quite sure he has implemented all of those ideas in running things at his own bar to this very day. Smart man, our Anders.

Since The Way Station opened in 2011, Anders has created a home for folks who love the stuff he loves and I know nothing aboutDoctor Who, Star Trek, comic books, sexy science lectures, superheroes, et cetera. The list goes on and on and on. In fact, he has even opened his actual home to various friends hes made there over the years. How many times have I wandered out of our shared office in the spare room of his apartment to find some lovely, bespectacled woman in the living room, quietly watching (what I now know is) Doctor Who on Anderss television and commented, Ooh, look! R2D2! only to have her whirl around and shriek, THATS NOT R2D2! THATS NOT R2D2! Ah, yes. Such is the passion and dedication to all things science fiction that is the bedrock of The Way Station and its success.

So now that Ive clearly delineated why Im unqualified to speak about the theme of this book, why should you listen to me and buy one for yourself and then buy a copy for every single person you know and love? Exactly. This book of cocktails, like its author, like The Way Station, has a curious yet universal and undeniable appeal. I dont know what or who a Gollum is, but you bet Id try a My Precious. Why? Because its weird and sounds delicious and the drawing that goes with it is really cool. Because this book is so cleverly written and entertaining that I cant put it down. Because, when you read this book, you will realize, like I did so many years ago, somewhere in the drunken wee hours at The Way Station, that you dont have to know what that big blue box in the corner is to have good time here. Trust me.

Most cocktail books start with a gauntlet of glassware, intimidating accoutrements, and technical terms to craft the perfect cocktail. This isnt that type of book. The recipes you are about to follow are simple, but the results are delicious, and hopefully I will entertain and educate you along the way. You are holding this book because you like to drink and I like to make drinks. I also like to drink.

I dont expect you to run out and buy shakers, stirrers, strainers, or specialty glassware. Use what you got. If the only thing clean in your cupboard is a jelly jar, go for it. You might not have a jigger but you probably have measuring cups or spoons, a soda bottle cap, table spoons, or a spork. Also, if you dont have a long spoon, chopsticks work just as well for stirring. Making drinks is supposed to be fun. Drinking them? Even more fun.

In order to simplify the drink-making process, Ill talk about parts. One part is 1 1/2 ounces, but hey, if youre having a party and want to make a batch, one part could be a liter of vodka, then you can use the empty bottle as a measuring tool for the other parts and add the extras (dashes and splashes) to taste.

As for ingredients, Ill use a brand name if it makes sense for the cocktail name or flavor, but Ill offer alternatives if you dont have that brand or KHAAAAAANt find it.

So, whether you want to toast your enemies with Klingon Blood Wine or take your chances with the Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster (and wake up feeling like your brain got smashed out with a gold brick wrapped in a lemon peel), this is the book for you, or your wonderfully nerdy/geeky thirsty friend.

One of the most enjoyable aspects of my job is creating new cocktails. Sometimes it starts with a name like Captain Jack from Doctor Who and Torchwood (), which immediately reveals the ingredients Captain Morgans and Jack Daniels, both of which are traditionally mixed with Coca-Cola. Voil, a cocktail.

Sometimes theres a traditional cocktail that lends itself easily to becoming a new drink. For example, the classic screwdriver (orange juice and vodka) becomes a Doctor Who sonic screwdriver when you add a colorful cordial. Ta-da!

Sometimes a drink gets its name after the fact. I once had a customer ask me for a delicious gin drink so I muddled cucumber and added gin and grapefruit and cranberry juice. She drank six of them and was a train wreck afterward, hence the name (see , under Snowpiercer ).

There is also the quest. Years ago I was served a Rocky Mountain Motherfucker. I thought it was a popular drink. It wasnt. Nobody outside of the Victorian Lady in Willimantic, Connecticut, knew how to make it. Once I started bartending I endeavored to re-create it via taste memory, and after many tipsy nights I finally succeeded. I have renamed this holy grail of cocktails in this book as the Awesome Mixed Drink ().

Finally, there is the challenge. One day, a regular at the bar asked me to make him a reason to live so that he could ask for one after a rough day. I gave it a shot on the fly, but it wasnt good enough. Disappointed that I failed him, I spent the next month trying out different and unique cocktails and eventually hit upon the right combination of sweet, salty, bitter, and sour in the right proportions; it was delicious in a savory way akin to umami, the fifth taste. The cocktail was a hit and definitely made a difference in my customers day when he ordered it. I repurposed that recipe in this book for my Fifth Element cocktail, Divinian ().

Simple

1) Get a glass.