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Laura Jensen Walker - Thanks for the Mammogram!

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Laura Jensen Walker Thanks for the Mammogram!
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    Thanks for the Mammogram!
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Cover
Endorsements

Thanks for the Mammogram! isnt for every woman. Its only for those whove experienced cancer, loved someone with cancer, met someone with cancer, worried about getting cancer, saw a made-for-TV movie about cancer once, read about cancer on a bus poster... in other words, honey, this book is for you. What an uplifting, uproarious approach to an otherwise serious, scary subject. Buy a copy for every woman you know!

Liz Curtis Higgs , author of Bad Girls of the Bible and It s Good to Be Queen

Thanks for the Mammogram! will give anyone going through breast cancer what they need most: courage, hope, and some much-needed laughs! By sharing her story, Laura Jensen Walker reminds all of us that while cancer is not funny, life often is, and sometimes laughter really is the best medicine!

Olympic skater Peggy Fleming Jenkins , breast cancer survivor

Very informative, but also most definitely positive and uplifting for all women who have to face the terrible trials and tribulations of breast cancer. The authors genuine sense of humor shows how keeping a positive attitude is so important. I also really enjoyed the chapter penned by her husband. Certainly we husbands go through our own trauma with breast cancer when it affects our wives and those close to us.

Greg Jenkins, MD , husband of Peggy Fleming Jenkins

I couldnt put this book down. A powerful demonstration of a patients ability to defeat a disease we all hate. The authors approach needs to be deeply incorporated in treatment plans offered by conventional therapies. A must read for patients, physicians, and all those involved in the care of breast cancerthis book will bring peace to those so desperately in need of it.

Ernie Bodai, MD, creator of the Breast Cancer Awareness postage stamp

The best medicine for what ails us is often a hopeful, hilarious, compassionate survivor/companion to hold our hand through the dark valley. No one need walk through breast cancer alone. Laura is the perfect bosom buddy for the journeyvia the laughter, tears, and helpful information in Thanks for the Mammogram!

Becky Johnson , coauthor of Nourished and We Laugh, We Cry, We Cook

Laura has pulled off an almost impossible featassaulting cancer with a massive dose of humor. And she won! This is an incredibly real, sensitive, gritty, hopeful book, woven through and through with Lauras signature brand of humor. It is far more than good entertainmentit is good medicine.

Dave Meurer , author of New Every Day

Half Title Page
Title Page
Copyright Page

2000, 2020 by Laura Jensen Walker

Published by Revell

a division of Baker Publishing Group

PO Box 6287, Grand Rapids, MI 49516-6287

www.revellbooks.com

Ebook edition created 2020

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any meansfor example, electronic, photocopy, recordingwithout the prior written permission of the publisher. The only exception is brief quotations in printed reviews.

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data is on file at the Library of Congress, Washington, DC.

ISBN 978-1-4934-2677-5

Unless otherwise indicated, Scripture quotations are from the Holy Bible, New International Version. NIV. Copyright 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved worldwide. www.zondervan.com. The NIV and New International Version are trademarks registered in the United States Patent and Trademark Office by Biblica, Inc.

Scripture quotations labeled KJV are from the King James Version of the Bible.

The information in this book isnt intended to be medical advice. Readers should consult their personal health professionals before adopting any of the suggestions in this book or drawing inferences from it.

The author is represented by MacGregor Literary Agency.

Epigraph

Give me a sense of humor, Lord;

Give me the grace to see a joke,

To get some happiness from life,

And pass it on to other folk.

Prayer in Chester Cathedral Chester, England

Dedication

In remembrance of my beautiful mother, Bettie, my biggest cheerleader. I love and miss you, Mom.

And for my beloved (and funny) aunt Sharon, a fellow breast cancer survivor whos been like a second mom to me for years.

Also, in memory of Erma Bombeck, Cokie Roberts,
and these who have gone on ahead...

WHATEVER IS TRUE,

Marita Brys

WHATEVER IS NOBLE,

Linda Gundy

WHATEVER IS RIGHT,

Lil Hooper

WHATEVER IS PURE,

Laura Kehoe

WHATEVER IS LOVELY,

Stephanie Suzanne Sheely

WHATEVER IS ADMIRABLE

Michelle Norris Smith

IF ANYTHING IS EXCELLENT

Carla Anne Valles

OR PRAISEWORTHY

Jane Valenzuela

THINK ABOUT SUCH THINGS.

Pat Walter

PHILIPPIANS 4:8

Contents

Cover

Endorsements

Half Title Page

Title Page

Copyright Page

Epigraph

Dedication

Foreword by Dr. Vincent Caggiano

Introduction

1. For Better or Worse

2. Beauty and the Breast

3. To Baldly Go Where Id Never Gone Before

4. How to Lose Thirty Pounds in Thirty Days: The Chemo Diet Way

5. Of Ice Chips, Suppositories, and Hospital Hats

6. Lumps and Late Bloomers

7. Mastectomy, the Sequel

8. Whats Love Got to Do with It?

9. Country Bear Jamboree Is Not a Rest Stop

10. Single Women, Single Breasts

11. Humorous Tales from the Front

13. Ill Show You Mine If Youll Show Me Yours

14. I Will Never Leave You or Forsake You

15. Laughter Is the Best Medicine

16. Going Flat

17. Where Do I Go from Here?

18. Moms, Mammograms, and Other Things for Which Im Thankful

Acknowledgments

What Some Readers Are Saying

About the Author

Back Ads

Back Cover

Foreword

When Laura Jensen Walker asked me to write a foreword to this book, I felt honored. After all, I was Lauras medical oncologist. I wrote the orders for the high dose of chemotherapy Laura received as part of a National Cancer Institutesponsored clinical trial. I saw Laura in the best and in the worst of times. I put her to the ultimate test, and she still managed to crack a joke to cheer me up and help others.

Thanks for the Mammogram! is the poignant, personal account of Lauras encounter with breast cancer, and by necessity, the medical establishment. Laura, the consummate journalist, questioned and probed, seeking answers to the unknown. She never once wavered in her determination to live and enjoy life to its fullest.

My first reading of the manuscript touched me deeply as I relived some of the terrifying and even humorous moments of Lauras battle against breast cancer. As Laura states, Cancer isnt funny, but she finds humor and hope in everyday situations, touching the hearts of all around herfriends, family, nurses, and yes, even doctors. During her darkest and scariest moments Laura always managed a good word, a smile, a bit of hope. She never lost her faith.

To me, Thanks for the Mammogram! is not just a chronicle of cancer-related eventsit is much more. It is about how Lauras family, friends, faith, and humor kept her together, whole, and sane during that awful period of temporary insanity we call adjuvant chemotherapy.

I know you will chuckle and cry, and cry and chuckle, when you read this book. And I can think of nothing more beautiful, for this is true life.

Vincent Caggiano, MD

Medical Director (retired), Sutter Cancer Center, Sacramento, CA

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