Pomade - Seeker: a sea odyssey: a memoir

SEEKER

A SEA ODYSSEY

A memoir

MIROLAND IMPRINT 19

Guernica Editions Inc. acknowledges the support of the Canada Council for the Arts and the Ontario Arts Council. The Ontario Arts Council is an agency of the Government of Ontario.

We acknowledge the financial support of the Government of Canada.

SEEKER

A SEA ODYSSEY

A memoir

Rita Pomade

MIROLAND (GUERNICA)

TORONTO BUFFALO LANCASTER (U.K.)

2019

Copyright 2019, Rita Pomade and Guernica Editions Inc.

All rights reserved. The use of any part of this publication, reproduced, transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise stored in a retrieval system, without the prior consent of the publisher is an infringement of the copyright law.

Series editor by Connie McParland

Cover design by Rafael Chimicatti

Interior design by David Moratto

Photos by Bernard Pomade

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First edition.

Printed in Canada.

Legal Deposit First Quarter

Library of Congress Catalog Card Number: 2018962090

Library and Archives Canada Cataloguing in Publication

Pomade, Rita, author

Seeker : a sea odyssey : a memoir / Rita Pomade.

(MiroLand imprint ; 19)

Issued in print and electronic formats.

ISBN 978-1-77183-351-6 (softcover).--ISBN 978-1-77183-352-3 (EPUB).--ISBN 978-1-77183-353-0 (Kindle)

1. Pomade, Rita--Travel. 2. Ocean travel. 3. Seafaring life.

4. Autobiographies. I. Title. II. Series: MiroLand imprint ; 19

G540.P66 2019910.45092C2018-906117-0C2018-906118-9

For Silvia Luna,

my beautiful, intrepid granddaughter

In memoriam:

Gladys Muriel Karolak

A childhood friend who preserved and returned every letter I sent her throughout the journey

Tennessee 2014

You know your mother, my sister
says, a bit irresponsible.

My mother isnt irresponsible,
my son replies.

What would you call her?
A seeker.

Oceans

I have a feeling that my boat

has struck, down then in the depths,

against a great thing.

And nothing

happens! Nothing ... Silence ... Waves ...

Nothing happens? Or has everything happened,

And are we standing now, quietly, in this new life?

JUAN RAMON JIMENEZ 18811958

Translation Robert Bly

November 2015: Montreal

Twenty years from now, you will be more disappointed by the things you didnt do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbour. Catch the trade wind in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.

H. JACKSON BROWN JR.

H ey Bernard, Roland phoned a short while ago. Something about a friend of his with a yacht in Tunisia that he wants you to sell. He says to get in touch with him.

Were talking by Skype. Bernard, my ex-husband, lives in Mexico. Im in Montreal. We talk almost every day. Skype collapses distances and theres no sense that hes away just a feeling of expanded space around me. Its a good feeling. I show him the cats, go for a coffee, and take a short phone call. He leaves the computer to grab a snack while he waits for me to get off the phone. We have an easy relationship, though it wasnt always that way.

Are you interested? I continue when hes back in his seat.

Im thinking about it, he replies. Rolands already sent me an email. The guy really wants to get rid of his yacht. Shes a 50-foot ketch and well-equipped. Hes offering a big commission, but theres no market in Tunisia. Tahiti is the place. If the owner is willing, Im in. Are you coming with me? We can do it again. Better this time. Rita?

I feel the excitement in the way he says my name. Years ago we sold the ketch he named Santa Rita, but he never lost his love of the sea, and I am woven into the threads of that love.

Im intrigued by the idea, thrilled he wants to go on another voyage with me. In the eighties we sailed from Southeast Asia to Europe. Now Id have a chance to explore the Pacific. The offer is tempting. But Im not sure. Back then we were dreamers, free-spirited and totally selfsufficient or so we thought. The rawness of sea life brought out our strengths, but it also heightened our weaknesses. In the end, I had to go off on my own. He had to do the same. But those six years at sea were the most extraordinary and influential years of my life, and I could never have made the journey without Bernard. Together we discovered a world we never knew existed.

I think about my creature comforts. How my stomach no longer turns when I see a squall line move across the sky. How I dont jerk awake every two hours for my turn at the helm. How I dont have to hustle for work from port to port or wonder if Bernard could ever love me as much as the Santa Rita. Im happy with my space. Sometimes I lay awake at night and think about my good fortune. Yet to sail again to relive that adventure from a more stable and aware place ...

My heart wants to say yes, but

I dont know, I tell Bernard. Let me think about it.

I write my childhood friend Gladys about Bernards proposal. Shes been living in Belgium since her twenties, but weve kept in touch. She writes back saying: Maybe this will help. In the packet shes sent me are the letters I mailed her through the six years of our adventure. I open the letters, touch the postmarks, finger the stamps each gesture a touchstone to memory.