Trevor Hamilton - Tell My Mother Im Not Dead: A Case Study in Mediumship Research

Frontispiece

Ralph Hamilton

1974-2002

Title page

TELL MY MOTHER IM NOT DEAD

A CASE STUDY IN MEDIUMSHIP RESEARCH

TREVOR HAMILTON

Copyright page

Copyright Trevor Hamilton, 2012

The moral rights of the author have been asserted.

No part of this publication may be reproduced in any form without permission, except for the quotation of brief passages in criticism and discussion.

Originally published in the UK by

Imprint Academic, PO Box 200, Exeter EX5 5YX, UK

Originally published in the USA by

Imprint Academic, Philosophy Documentation Center

PO Box 7147, Charlottesville, VA 22906-7147, USA

2012 digital version by Andrews UK Limited

www.andrewsuk.com

Dedication

For Anne, Dan, and Ralph

Introduction

This short book divides into two parts. The first section is a personal narrative of the impact of the death of our son Ralph on us and our efforts to see if there was any evidence for his continued existence (generated largely through visits to mediums) that a grieving but thinking person could take seriously. The second section is an attempt to evaluate objectively (so far as that is possible for people in our position) the quality of that evidence and to come to some conclusion.

Both parts are necessary in order to do justice to the complexity and intensity of the subject matter. The title Tell My Mother Im Not Dead: A Case Study in Mediumship Research is meant to reflect the dual nature of this book: recognition of the incredibly powerful and persuasive nature of the language often used in a sitting with a medium, and the need always to test this language against objective and scientific criteria.

Others were strongly affected by Ralphs death, as well as ourselves: Dan his older brother, Ralphs girlfriend, and his many friends. I have not included their experiences in this short book; except very briefly, out of respect for their privacy, but we both fully acknowledge what they, too, must have suffered. No matter how intense and private our grief, we constantly reminded ourselves that Dan had lost his only sibling, someone who had been part of his life from birth, and part of his very identity.

I have spent a considerable (perhaps an over-indulgent) amount of time on my thought processes and emotions in the first part. I did this because I wanted the reader to experience the turmoil I was going through and my fear, at times, that I was not judging things objectively because of weaknesses in my own personality. I have also given space to what was possibly a mildly paranoid sequence of events, since to delete it would not be honest, and in fact it had, for me at least, interesting insights into the nature of evidence and truth and the way in which individuals construct their view of reality.

The second part of the book seeks to evaluate the sessions with mediums on the basis of some of the small but significant research that has taken in several different centres across the world. The book is subtitled a case study since it is the record of a set of individual experiences outside a controlled environment. Yet, real-world studies are as important as laboratory work in order to try to understand the conditions and processes under which such phenomena may or may not take place.

I have provided pretty full accounts of the statements every medium made so that each reader can judge the situation for themselves, and one recurring theme through the book is the need for individuals and parapsychologists to engage directly with this most central of issues - the hypothesis of the survival of bodily death and the search for high quality evidence from competent, well-trained mediums to confirm or deny this.

Because the book covers both individual experience and issues involved in assessing such experiences objectively, it is hoped that it will help those who have suffered loss and who, given some initial support and guidance, would wish to embark on the same journey I have made. This book may also provide parapsychologists with some future research perspectives, but it has been written primarily for a more general audience and I make no claim to highly specialised expertise. The section on the variety and range of types of evidence for life after death, for example, is indicative of the material available and certainly not a comprehensive account.

If the reader wishes to pursue the matters and issues outlined in this book in greater detail, she/he could do no better than join the Society for Psychical Research. I have found those members of that society, whom I have come to know, highly intelligent, helpful, and well balanced individuals. They give the complete lie to the old canard that people interested in this field are dotty, vague, and impractical. They are some of the sharpest people I have met. In addition, the electronic online library that membership gives access to is a hugely valuable resource for further investigation and research.

Finally, I would like to thank Anne and Dan for their loving support during the writing of this book, and all those others who have made useful and helpful comments on it.

Note 1 : I have used words like extrasensory perception, psi, super-psi as more or less equivalent and as describing the unknown force or forces generating anomalous or paranormal phenomena. I have not always been consistent in attaching alleged, ostensible, and apparent to these terms. One should not read into this inconsistency either whole-hearted belief or disbelief in the events and experiences outlined. I have also included a glossary of terms (Appendix 3) of some of the more unfamiliar terms - to a reader new to this subject - that have been used in this book.

Note 2 : I reference books/articles that have helped form my views by author, and date of edition used (and also by page where appropriate). Details of all articles, books, and websites consulted are given at the end of this publication.

Part 1: Experiences

2002

July

If a Mr and Mrs Hamilton are on board, would they please remain seated till the other passengers have left.

The plane had just landed at Bristol on a dull afternoon. We had returned from a weeks holiday in Paris. Anne and I looked at each other.

Perhaps its your mother. Maybe its the car.

But we knew it had to be something more significant than that: something to do with our sons, Dan or Ralph.

We sat and sat. One man took ages, fussily adjusting his dress, and checking and rechecking his bag. Eventually we made the exit. All the stewardess, with her bright professional smile, could say was that she didnt know what it was all about, but the police would like to talk to us. A pleasant but unsmiling policewoman, with a large guy in plain clothes beside her, stood at the bottom of the steps.

Yes, we were Mr and Mrs Hamilton. Yes, Ralph did drive a car with that number plate.

Is it Ralph? Is it Ralph?

We said that again and again as we walked with them into the terminal. But she merely replied that she wanted us to identify some items - and we did - in a small airless room just off the passenger check in.

Yes, that was his watch given to him by the girl who had nearly broken his heart. Yes, yes, yes (hurriedly to get it over with) to all the other effects. Everything was just plain unreal, as if we were being forced to take part in a film and speak lines that referred to the tragedies of other people. I wanted to stop the kind police woman and say, OK, I realise you are just doing your job, but youve got the wrong parents.

Then she told us the details.

We soon realised why she had initially refused to answer our questions. She first wanted to establish that Ralph was the driver, because the driver of that car had been in a fatal accident (a collision with a bus at 12.45 on the outskirts of a West Country town on Sunday July 7 th - our last day in Paris). Anne, curiously enough, had experienced at that time a brief, terrible sense of desolation, and had to get up off the bench, as we sat dozing in the sunlight in the Jardin du Luxembourg, and just move around for a few minutes. The mood soon faded as we left the gardens and encountered thousands of brightly dressed roller skaters speeding down the streets specially closed for them each Sunday.