Craig Maltese - A Life Measured in Sessions: Sex, Fitness, and Self-Destruction

I dedicate this book to my wife, Grace. To me, she is truly the best part of every day and my life. I cannot begin to describe how grateful I am to her. She has stood by me through so many terrible situations of my own creation, one after the otherones that have caused her great pain as a woman, a wife, and a person. Through the many years in which I exhibited daily evidence of an underdeveloped emotional intellect and deteriorating moral fiber, she continued to pick me up in every sense of the word, every single time, over and over again. She is the one single person ever in my life who has never given up on me. She is the FIRST and ONLY person in my life that I have truly loved. Every day, she gives me unwavering encouragement and support to do the things I want to do in my life. There is no way I would be writing this book, and quite possibly without exaggeration,

I may not be alive today, if not for her.

A heartfelt thank you to Briar Dougherty, without whom this book would not be. Thank you to KWE Publishing for believing in me and my story.

Why the extended version:

After reading the reviews for the first edition and knowing the story resonated with so many of our readerswe wanted to celebrate that milestone and update readers on where Craig is today and add a few additional stories that didnt make it into the first edition!

Additionally, each of these stories were told by Craig, but translated into written word by Briar. Updating the credits is a huge part of living authentically and being true to the collaboration that made this book possible.

We hope you enjoy.

There came a time after off-boarding the yoga studio when I craved purpose once again. Id grown bored of not working and saw myself slipping into unhealthy habits of the past. I heard myself telling my therapist the same old stories over and over again. I needed change, and I thought it meant getting a job. My dad's voice echoed in the back of my head to make something of my future. I convinced myself I needed to shoot for a VP position and re-enter the world of health and fitness.

I looked at my out-of-date rsum and started looking for reinforcements. I came across Briars profile on LinkedIn and paused. She was a career coach who helped professionals with complex career transitions. After speaking with her on the phone, I realized quickly she had mastered the art of telling the story of anyones past to get them their next job. The kicker: not only did she have the right skill set for my challenge, but she had several years experience working as a general manager in the NYC health and fitness industry and understood the world of personal training from inside the gates. I figured, Whats to lose? She may be my only chance for someone to really get me.

I engaged her services to write my rsum and she was able to take it to a place that I would never had been able to do myself. Not only did she translate my skills, she also had a knack for calling me out when I wasnt communicating in a respectful way. She wasnt easily intimidated, and she always had valid, well-formulated explanations of why she chose a certain approach. She could easily share her thought process without fail. This was huge!

We continued working together, and she coached me through the interview process and showed me how to see life a bit differently, from an Emotional Quotient (EQ) perspective. I quickly dialed back my couch time, as I had made more progress in two months than I had over the last seven years of working with therapists, where I had been repeating things over and over again ad nauseam. The difference now was that I was making progress and seeing quick results. I was making headway toward some semblance of normalcy in communicating with other humans.

After successfully navigating a job offer and relocating, I was back in the corporate grind and started feeling overwhelmed, and the deep sense of self-loathing ensued. So, one day, I called Briar. And so began the airing of my story

Craig Maltese

* * *

I remember the day Craig called. I really never knew which side of him Id be getting on the phone. Would he be impatient, frustrated, or excited? I had seen quite a few sides by then, so I was prepared. But he paused that day before speaking; it seemed as though he was gathering notes on a sales pitch right before he gave a speech.

So, I want to discuss something with you, he said with an assertive and oddly formal voice.

Im not sure how youll take it, but I need to ask. Ive had this book in my head for the last eight years. Ive finally realized, youre the one who can get it out of me. He said.

What book? I asked.

He was so hesitant as he spoke. He explained his checkered past and how it was time to come out with it, to get it out of his head and onto paper.

So, I agreed, and we started down a long path, filled with tons of twists and curves and awakenings for both of us. We would schedule sessions where he would just speak about his stories and Id take notes, pages, and pages of notes.

After hearing several stories, and as a coach, I couldnt resist asking my biggest questions:

What happened when you were a kid? Where was your mom? Your parents? Why is this the path you chose?

Craig will never see himself the victim, or allow anyone else to, for that matter, so he never once blamed his mom or family. But he vividly remembers his childhood and his mom, and he sees it all now for what it was and what he experienced.

Those stories compelled me. As a mom and woman, I knew I had to uncover those memories of his childhood that he had tucked away and tell the real story behind Craig Maltese. The one that starts from the beginning, that shares the pain of neglect, of witnessing unimaginable acts, of being held to standards that he was never set up to fulfill, and of putting one foot in front of the other, just to make it to the next day.