Tracy Richards - Asha: Lessons in Hope and Life

We all have that one relationship that changes everything, that one connection that allows us to move into a full expression of our true selves. These arent always easy attachments, but from the most difficult experiences often come the most powerful lessons. Life can burn us to the ground and stifle our voices, and only through the struggle can we rise, our murmurs becoming a roar.

I felt lost once. Maybe you feel lost too. Perhaps youve already found the path back. Either way, this story is for you. This is the account of my downfall and eventual rise, facilitated by the greatest teacher of my life: a dog named Asha.

Asha, a deaf and blind Australian Shepherd I rescued when she was five months old, used her voice from the very beginning. She barked her way into my life and immediately went to work. Over time, my relationship with her revealed itself to be the most significant in my life so far. Some may think learning only happens through the guidance of designated advisors and mentors, but teachers can come in unexpected forms. Unexpected though she was, Asha became mine.

Now eleven, Asha has spent her life relentlessly coming at me with tough lessons. I was a fast learner in school, graduating at the top of my class. But that has not been the case in the College of Asha. While surviving Asha has been the greatest challenge of my life, she has been by my side through the most difficult life experiences and comforted me when I needed it most. During those moments, my course of study never stopped; she continued to push, as the most effective teachers do.

When I adopted Asha, I was grossly unhappy and in denial about my reality. She provided an opportunity to pour my love into another living being, find a purpose, and escape the loneliness of a life I did not want. Asha did what the gurus do: she lived a life of truth, hope, and love so that I could develop those same qualities. She held up a mirror and I had to take a long hard look at the person staring back at me. Our relationship forced me to face inconvenient truths on my journey to becoming the person I so desperately wanted to be. She pointed out complexities I didnt want to acknowledge, and I hated her for that. It took a long time to embrace her reflections.

I attempted to write this book for over five years, and it always came out as Ashas story, the story I thought people wanted to hear. I left the ugly stuff unsaid, unwritten. I couldnt bear for people to know how unmanageable my life had become. Instead, I wanted to present this perfect image of myself as a good person. I was so desperate for outside validation that I downplayed my distress and buried my real feelings. I never got very far with that account because it was so disingenuous.

As Asha gets older and her time grows shorter, I realize I want to share our whole story, not because others need to hear it, but because I need to tell it. I need to tell our story, all of iteven the ugly stuff. Telling our story has allowed me to heal and embrace the messy reality that comes with being human.

This book is for anyone who has found themselves in a fog and didnt know what they wanted but knew they didnt want what they had. I write for those who may still be looking for a way out and those who realize the only way out is through, and for anyone who has ever really loved an animal and been loved by one in return. I offer this story for those who understand the complex relationship between companionship and obligation, for those who chose to embark on the journey knowing it would end in loss and heartbreak, and for those who were fortunate enough to spend a precious portion of their lifetime with that one special four-legged family member.

At its core, this is a story of hope and life. As said in The Curious Case of Benjamin Button , the film based on F. Scott Fitzgeralds story, I hope you live a life youre proud of, and if youre not, I hope you have the courage to start over again. I was not proud of the life I was living, and I had to find the courage to start all over again. I determined what kind of life I wanted and every day took action toward it. I have built a life of my design and will be forever grateful for the lessons imparted to me from the most unusual teacher.

This is our story.