Ruth Mannino - Thursday Mornings: Breathe, Stretch, Listen, Love

2020 All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the publisher except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

Print ISBN 978-1-09832-170-3

eBook ISBN: 978-1-09832-171-0

Dedication

To Regina Neumeister, who instilled in me from an early age,
a love of reading. This ones for you, Mom!

Introduction

Every Thursday morning finds me on stage. Not at some Rodgers and Hammerstein production or church choral group. I wont be winning an Oscar or presenting one to any of the famous stars. Im up there solo, and how I arrived there is the beginning of this story.

The stage is part of the Robbinsville, New Jersey Senior Centers multi-purpose room. My title as chair yoga instructor came about rather haphazardly. Recently retired, and considering my daughter no longer needed child care services, I found myself with time to spare. It didnt take long for boredom to set in. Life went from running after toddlers, changing diapers, reading nursery rhymes, cleaning up spilt milk (sometimes I cried) to searching for ideas to fill empty hours. There were just so many jigsaw puzzles to piece together, and detective novels to read before I would guess whodunnit and spoil the drama. Amazon was taking all my money and the malls were becoming way too familiar. Life became mundane, and mundane became hazardous to my health.

It was at this point I joined the chair yoga exercise group being offered at the senior center. Connie Ferrara was our fearless leader. I was surprised to hear this energetic, amusing lady was eighty-five years old! She became my inspiration and rightly so. Her spirit was infectious. She had us dancing, stretching, breathing in unison. Her witty remarks had us laughing. We laughed a lot in her class. Thursday mornings became something I looked forward to. The class was made up of yogis in their sixties through their nineties. Men and women, at all stages of expertise, came together in their desire for a healthy body, mind, and soul. I enjoyed being there and my initial hesitation on being labeled a senior citizen quickly dissipated on seeing how much fun these seniors were having. Connie encouraged and energized us. It was with sinking hearts we learned about her moving to the West coast. Her husband passed away and her nearest son lived in California. It took a while for Connie to sell her home, but the inevitable goodbye party was planned, attended, there were hugs all around, and then she was gone.

Our group was in limbo. For a few weeks afterward we went through the motions, each of us leading one of Connies exercises. It didnt have the same feel, but it was close. It was at this time Renee Burns, the centers director, began to interview various candidates to take Connies place. She found the best in Eileen who teaches chair yoga at the center on Tuesdays. I dutifully went to Eileens Tuesday class while continuing Thursdays free-for-all sessions. Three months after Connie left, I decided I could and would take her place. This decision didnt come easy, after all, it was quite a commitment, but once it was made, I announced it to the class and was met with smiles and nods.

Something dawned on me during year three of my yoga undertaking. After hearing bits and pieces of my yogis lives, I began to form the initial thought process leading to this book. I had, in front of me, people with interesting stories, one who emigrated from China, one from Holland, one from Croatia, and others from New York, and some not far from Robbinsville in New Jersey. What led each member of this diverse group to the Robbinsville Senior Center and to my Thursday morning yoga group? What began as a casual interest, changed my life as I listened to each story. I grew to love each interviewee as they allowed me into their lives. Ninety-year-old Emily, from China; eighty-five-year-old Jack living with glaucoma; Lillian, unbelievably spry, our matriarch at the age of ninety-five; Elisabeth (eighty-five) had a front-row seat to World War II from her home in the Netherlands; Ernie (eighty-five) and his new wife Gail (eighty-three) found each other late in life after losing their first spouses; Harvey, the youngest at the age of seventy-five, grew up in New Jersey as a gay man when it definitely was not cool to be gay; and lastly, Jay Derrico (seventy-eight) emigrated as a child with her family from Croatia to escape communism.

Along with those interviewed, I want to thank the other dedicated yogis who come to class every Thursday morning in search of peace of mind, and a limber body: Aggie, Alexandra, Alicia, Anita, Betty, Cathy, David, Don, Ester, Helen, Margie, Marina, Matt, Minerva, Ramona, Roe, Rich, and Zarina. They have changed my life and Im happy and honored to share with them my Thursday mornings. I also want to thank Renee Burns, C.H. Kang, and Ed Drago for making our Thursday morning meeting space warm and welcoming.

We are travelers on a cosmic journey,

stardust,

swirling and dancing in the eddies and whirlpools of infinity.

Life is eternal.

We have stopped for a moment to encounter each other,

to meet,

to love,

to share.

This is a precious moment. It is a little parenthesis in eternity.

~ Paul Coelho

Chapter One

~Emily Ou~

The first thing you notice when meeting Emily is her regal standing. For a woman of ninety years, she is remarkably well put together. Her hair always just so, meticulous in her makeup, beautiful clothes, and jewelry, convey the impression she is a woman of substance who has a story to tell. I chose Emily to interview when I learned she was taping her conversations with other seniors who sat at her lunch table. We took our interview to a private room, where we spent hours-she telling her life story, and I listening. Emily told her story with an easy laugh. She met interruptions with patience and grace. I was soon to learn how well these attributes served her during her compelling, and sometimes tumultuous life history.

Emily Jing Ou was born in 1928 in Shanghai, China during the Chinese Nationalist Era, of a well-to-do family who, before the communist takeover in 1949, enjoyed a life of servants, limousine services, and topnotch schools. She was born in her paternal grandfathers house with no plumbing (customary at the time) which looked out over a beautiful courtyard. Her father was well educated and spoke excellent English. A wealthy businessman, he later became chairman of the Kwang Hwa oil company, sole agent of the Richfield Oil Corporation in China. Under his leadership, the company procured its own wharf in Shanghai which was a big deal!

Emilys mother was betrothed to her father at the age of four. Her paternal grandfather played matchmaker, and it was said her mother would hide when her future father-in-law came to visit. He was a distinguished builder in Shanghai, the famous Jade Buddha Temple being one of his projects. Emilys mother was an obedient child, very loving and eager to please. She did not protest when her feet were bound, an old Chinese tradition, and as a result, she had a lifetime of foot problems. Emilys maternal grandfather was a dentist with many apprentices under him. He pulled, fixed, and supplied gold teeth to those who could afford his services. She never knew him; he passed before she was born.