William Alexander - The $64 Tomato: How One Man Nearly Lost His Sanity, Spent a Fortune, and Endured an Existential Crisis in the Quest for the Perfect Garden

Praise for The $64 Tomato

Engaging, well paced and informative.

The New York Times Book Review

A wry memoir in which every reader whos spent more to grow a plant than he could purchase it for at the super market will recognize his own successes, failures and foibles.

San Francisco Chronicle

Both an inspiration and a cautionary tale for anyone who has ever looked at a tomato and thought, I could grow that!

Life magazine

A genuinely humorous book that debunks the American dream not in the familiar economic sense but in its rural incarnation. It is a paean to the homesteader who never gets written about, the pioneer whom all of us could have been in another life.

The Washington Post Book World

Money, sex, and aging. Thats real gardening!

The New York Observer

Engaging, funny, and down-to-earth.

Entertainment Weekly

William Alexander transcends the inevitable failures with bushel baskets of self-deprecating wit. As a bonus, bits of practical information are scattered as freely as seeds among the hilarious anecdotes.

The Charlotte Observer

You dont have to be a gardener to enjoy and learn from William Alexanders derring-do. You dont have to know a shuffle hoe from a reel mower to laugh out loud.

The State (SC)

A quick read full of fun and foibles. And because the adversaries are worthy opponents, combat is fair.

The Seattle Times

A rollicking read.

New York Newsday

Reminiscent of the movie comedy Mr. Blandings Builds His Dream House. Enjoyable, thought-provoking.

The National Gardener

Often hilarious. Will strike a universal chord.

The Dallas Morning News

A witty memoir proving that Mother Earth cant be controlled, especially when beetles, worms and grubs come out to play.

The Economist

Readers who have decided to try growing a vegetable or two will, instead, laugh uproariously at author William Alexanders tales of squirrel armies, organic growing and a woodchuck that would make Dr. Frankenstein proud.

The Louisville Courier-Journal

Recounts with wry humor and dead-on insights [Alexan ders] joys, woes, epiphanies, and philosophies. [This] book will strike a chord (and hit a few nerves) with anyone who dreams of orderly rows of ripening veggies and eating a tomato fresh off the vine.

Garden Design magazine

[A] hilarious horticultural memoir. Even if you never plant a seed in your life, The $64 Tomato will give you a healthy appreciation of the fact that we will never be able to completely control Mother Earth.

The St. Petersburg Times

Alexanders account is a delightful guide to achieving gardening bliss. Humor, it turns out, is essential, and Alexander has a large store of it; it infuses his story from start to finish.

The Minneapolis Star Tribune

The subtitle applies to just about everybody who ever stuck a spade into soil. So what makes Alexander different? He can write about his mistakes and successesand there are plenty of bothin a funny, self-deprecating way.

Richmond Times-Dispatch

For a breezy summer read or a break from trying to get in those peppers after all the rain weve had, The $64 Tomato will leave you laughing and understanding why Adam and Eve might think Eden wasnt such a great place after all.

The Rutland (VT) Herald

An amusing romp through one mans innocent little dream.

CS (Chicago)

[Alexander] admits to his madness with a wry and rueful sense of humor [and] treats us to an often rib-tickling tale of his misadventures.

The Raleigh News & Observer

This enjoyable book, laced with humor and Alexanders garden philosophy, is highly recommended.

Library Journal

Quick and very entertaining. Alexander is Icarus; his garden is the sun. Where these two meet makes The $64 Tomato very endearing.

The Boston Globe

[A] hilarious horticultural memoir. Alexanders slightly poisoned paradise manages to impart an existential lesson on the interconnectedness of nature and the fine line between nurturing and killing.

Publishers Weekly, starred review

An amusing compilation of dos and donts for aspiring gardeners afflicted with hubris.

Kirkus Reviews

I thoroughly enjoyed every word of The $64 Tomato and was literally unable to put the book down. I give The $64 Tomato five out of five sunflowers.

Bella Online

A delicious ride through one mans seriocomic horticultural adventure.

Book Page

William Alexanders intelligent and funny memoir is a tribute to humankinds irrepressible urge to cultivate the earth. His warmhearted take on the domestic scene reminds us all that life began in a garden.

Katherine Whiteside,
author of Antique Flowers and Classic Bulbs

William Alexanders engaging book, The $64 Tomato, shows just to what great lengths a man will go to have the garden of his dreams. For those of us who love to grow things, nothing Alexander does, no matter how ridiculous, costly, or time-consuming, seems out of the question. It all seems perfectly sane, and somehow reassuring.

Richard Goodman, author of French Dirt

William Alexander

Authors Note:

While the people and events described in the following pages are real, some names have been changed for the sake of privacy.

Published by

ALGONQUIN BOOKS OF CHAPELHILL
Post Office Box 2225
Chapel Hill, NC 27515-2225

a division of

WORKMAN PUBLISHING

225 Varick Street
New York, New York 10014

2006 by William Alexander.

First paperback edition, Algonquin Books of Chapel Hill, March 2007.

Originally published by Algonquin Books of Chapel Hill in 2006.

All rights reserved.

Printed in the United States of America.

Published simultaneously in Canada by Thomas Allen & Son Limited.

Design by Anne Winslow.

Lines from Robert Creeleys The Door from Collected Poems of Robert Creeley, 19451975, Berkeley: University of California Press, 1983, reprinted by permission. Copyright 1983 The Regents of the University of California.

A portion of Electronic Singing Fish Drives Deer from Garden excerpted from Hints from Heloise. Copyright 2001 by King Features Syndicate. Reprinted by permission.

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Alexander, William, 1953

The $64 tomato / William Alexander.

p. cm.

ISBN-13: 978-1-56512-503-2 (HC)

1. Vegetable gardeningHudson River Valley Region (N.Y. and N.J.)Anecdotes. 2. GardenersHudson River Valley Region (N.Y. and N.J.)Anecdotes. 3. Alexander, William, 1953
I. Title: Sixty-four dollar tomato. II. Title.
SB320.7.N7A44 2006
635.097473dc22 2005053790

ISBN-13: 978-1-56512-557-5 (PB)

10 9 8 7 6 5 4

For Anne, Zach, and Katie

And to the memory of my father, William Alexander

I will go to the garden.

I will be a romantic. I will sell

myself in hell,

in heaven also I will be.

Robert Creeley, The Door

Theres a fine line between gardening and madness.

Cliff Clavin in Cheers

Why cant Dad be more like other dads? Katie asked my wife recently. All my friends dads spend Sundays watching football and drinking beer. Then for good measure she added, I wish we had a normal family.