Christine Pelosi - The Nancy Pelosi Way: Advice on Success, Leadership, and Politics from Americas Most Powerful Woman

Copyright 2019 by Christine Pelosi

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Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data is available on file.

Cover design by Brian Peterson

Cover photo credit Getty Images

ISBN: 978-1-5107-5584-0

Ebook ISBN 978-1-5107-5585-7

Printed in the United States of America

I really want women to know their power, to value their experience. To understand that nothing has been more wholesome in the political process than the increased involvement of women.

House Speaker Nancy Pelosi

Introduction

ON DECEMBER 12, 2018, THE nation held its collective breath as a bizarre scene unfolded on national television. President Donald Trump, Vice President Mike Pence, Senate Democratic Leader Charles Schumer, and House Democratic Leader Nancy Pelosi were in the Oval Office for what was supposed to be a meeting to avoid a federal government shutdown. Dressed in a green dress and seated poised on a chair facing the president as befits the leader of a coequal branch of government meeting at the White House, Pelosi saw the budget negotiations devolve into a barrage of interruptions, mansplaining, and third-party insults from the president, who was trying to needle her for not having 218 votes publicly announced in her bid to return as Speaker of the House.

Finally it came to this:

Trump: Nancys in a situation where its not easy for her to talk right now, and I understand, and I fully understand that. Were going to have a good discussion, and were going to see what happens. But we have to have border security.

Pelosi: Mr. PresidentMr. President, please dont characterize the strength that I bring to this meeting as the leader of the House Democrats, who just won a big victory.

In that moment, she obliterated any doubts about her resolve to return as Speaker with calm and confidence, or about her ability to corral an unruly presidents out-of-control negotiations, or her intention to be a role model for girls told they didnt belong, professional women talked over by blustery men, and older women told they were no longer useful. A few moments later, having refused to fund a border wall for which the president had repeatedly said Mexico would pay, Nancy Pelosi pulled on a 2012 winter coat the designer had presciently named red fire, slipped on her shades, and stepped out of the White House and into meme history.

The next day, she locked down her 218th vote and her historic position as the first and second woman Speaker of the House of Representatives.

That moment was chosen for this book cover because it encapsulates the Nancy Pelosi Way: a woman in full who knows the power of bringing her complete selfas a leader, as a political force, as a legislator, as an activist, as a mom, and as the daughter of a powerhouse mother whose dreams were ahead of her timeto the moment.

Suddenly the coat meme was everywhere: videos, fan art, campaign swag. I have the pillowcase to give my daughter a virtual confidence-building hug from her Mimi as needed, and definitely wear the shades pin for the boost.

How did this explode?

First, I think there are a lot of people who have always wanted to get in a room with the president of the United States and hold their own, regardless of party. As Nancy often says, you have to be able to breathe the air at the highest altitudes. Many peopleincluding presidentsforget themselves when they get to the Oval Office and need to be reminded that they are mortal. This particular denizen of the Oval Officeperhaps more than mostneeded the reality check that he represents but one coequal branch of government. Rather than a sycophant whispering in his ear, Trump got a free and powerful woman telling him out loud in view and earshot of the cameras he himself had ushered in: Remember, your presidency is mortal.

Second, after all the sexism and misogyny that was hurled at Nancy Pelosi and Hillary Clinton over the years and in the 2016 presidential campaign and then at Nancy Pelosi after Hillary lost, Nancy had the audacity to stay, while in the words of Joy Ann Reid, some people feel the need to flee to the safety of a white male candidate. Certainly one had been offeredsort of. The goal of a small group of people in the House was to force out Nancy Pelosi; then, a new hypothetical safe candidate would emerge whom Republicanswho mercilessly attacked straight white male military veteran Democrats including Max Cleland, Tom Daschle, Al Gore, John Kerry, and Jack Murthawould decide to leave alone. They continued on the path even after Nancy led the effort to win back the House Democratic majority, which is why Trump thought bullying Nancy about the speakership fight in public in the third person was somehow going to unnerve her. If a billion-dollar multiyear negative ad campaign from the far right and 137,000 negative ads against her in the 2018 campaign cycle had not fazed Nancy Pelosi, his remarks didnt stand a chanceexcept to boomerang. Which they did.

Third, Nancy Pelosi has a depth of experience and professionalism that is relatable for millions of career women who show up twice as prepared, coiffed, and focused as men only to be ignored, talked over, or co-opted when men steal their ideas right in front of them and receive rapturous praise for such original thinking. Maybe after two years of all the boorishness, we just wanted to see some joy in a woman comfortable in her power and ready to fight for it just like a man wouldif in fact there would ever be a male party leader who would coach his team to victory and then get fired.

Naturally, as a daughter, I see things behind the scenes that others dont, so the purpose of this storytelling is to add context to the public stories that I think shaped Nancy Pelosi as a daughter, mother, wife, friend, representative, and role model to aspiring leaders looking to step into their own power and make their own choicesnot those dictated to them. I deliberately chose to tell a few stories of ways in which Nancy Pelosi was forged by childhood, school, and parenthood. I tell stories of her first campaign for Congress, her efforts to elect more women leaders (which has helped create the most diverse Congress in history, with thirty-five new women members elected in 2018, compared to the twelve House Democratic congresswomen who served together when she arrived in 1987), her innovative ways of getting her message to the people and the peoples message to the Congress, and her latest campaign to protect her legislative baby, the Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act.