Dr. Rick Brinkman - Dealing with meetings you cant stand: meet less and do more

Copyright 2017 by Rick Brinkman Productions, Inc. All rights reserved. Except as permitted under the United States Copyright Act of 1976, no part of this publication may be reproduced or distributed in any form or by any means, or stored in a database or retrieval system, without the prior written permission of the publisher.

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Each one of us makes a difference. This is dedicated to you being an agent of change, one who turns conflict and polarization into communication and cooperation.

S o many people contribute to our coming to each moment in time, I am overwhelmed with considering how to acknowledge them all.

Certainly my mother and father, who survived Auschwitz and came to New York City, where I was raised. With special thanks to my mother, who, when I was five years old and said, I want to be a garbage collector, replied with, When you finish medical school, you can be anything you want. Which led me to becoming a naturopathic doctor, an evidence-based physician focused on wellness, health restoration, and optimal health (see naturopathic.org).

Thanks to Dr. Doughton, who in my senior year shifted my focus to mind-body medicine and how communication and relationships affect our health and well-being.

To my good friend, naturopathic doctor colleague, and coauthor Dr. Rick Kirschner, with whom I took the journey of communication and seminars, armed with a costume trunk and a mission to change the world for the better.

To the American Association of Naturopathic Physicians for putting up with my seven-year reign of terror on the board, where much of this was incubated.

To Lisa, my wife of 38 years, for being the brilliant artist and thoughtful therapist that she is and for enabling an environment in our home of creativity that fosters the creation of works such as this.

To my daughter, Carle, for being so much fun as a kidand as an adult, living her values and making a positive difference in the world.

And to my feline friends, Neelix and Leela, who sit patiently on my desk purring, waiting for me to take a break so we can go out for a walk together.

PART I

THE PROBLEMSwithMEETINGS

If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be meetings.

DAVE BARRY

I remember the first business meeting I attended. Fresh out of naturopathic medical school, I was a new resident at the school clinic. We had a clinic conference meeting once a week with all the doctors. I thought the purpose was to be informed of anything we needed to know, discuss any issues we had, and, most of all, have an opportunity to ask the senior doctors questions about our cases. We sat in a circle in an uncomfortably small room. The clinic director began to talk. Nothing he was saying had anything to do with why I thought we were there. Then he free associated from one topic to another... Im sure you get the picture. I counted the people in the room, since I thought we all were supposed to have a chance to speak, and I noticed the number of minutes left on the clock. It was simple math to see that there was no way that was going to happen. Then I tuned back in to the clinic director, who was droning on in a hypnotic monotone. That day I vowed, once I had my own practice, never to let myself get into meetings that I could not control.

Have you ever been in a meeting that was a complete waste of time? Or listened to someone go on and on, wondering, Whats the point? Have you experienced conflicts at a meeting in which some people were trying to bully others to get their way? Or perhaps you have been with people who shoot down any idea. And then there are those who just dont participate. You never hear from them, and they dont contribute to decisions, but they are always happy to complain about those decisions later. Perhaps youve been at meetings that easily could have been accomplished in half the time. Maybe youve even experienced one in which you werent sure why you were meeting at all.