Lauren Emily Whalen - Two Winters

April

I checked the bathroom mirror and saw I wasnt alone. It was straight out of the movie Scream , except instead of a guy with an Edvard Munch mask, a semicircle of volleyball girls lurked behind me. Anis teammates. Looking right at me. Looking mean.

This wasnt good.

Inhaling quietly, and noticing one was blocking the door, I turned around, feeling the porcelain of the sink press into my lower back.

Hows it going, dyke, said Laura Frink. She had both a mean serve and the biggest ass in our grade, which she proudly showed off with an incredibly short skirt. Her eyes were slits, so narrow I could only see navy blue eyeliner.

A scream froze in my throat. The last bell had rung, which meant everyone was making a break for the parking lot or after-school activities. Who would hear me? No one.

Ani says youve been hitting on her, said Michelle Casey, who had terrifyingly broad shoulders. Even her untucked shirttails looked menacing as she advanced on me and poked her stubby finger into my sternum. Thered be a bruise tomorrow.

Dammit, Ani. As if ignoring me wasnt devastating enough, shed outed me. Probably to get me off her backnot that Id even tried to contact her. I doubt she had any idea how devastating this could be.

Or maybe she did.

Standing there trapped, my mind whirling with how to get out of this circle of ripped, angry girls with nasty smiles, I realized I didnt know Ani at all. That despite her words of love, what wed had was anything but.

You see, Paul-lee-na, Laura said, stepping toward me. I winced, trying my hardest not to let her see me sweat. We dont like when someone fucksa dab of spittle hit me in the facewith one of our girls.

Yuuuuup, drawled Gretchen Keithley, cracking her knuckles the way she always did.

We dont like muff divers, squeaked Melissa Morrison, trying to inject threat through her Kewpie doll voice.

Hey. Nora Cox came forward and gave me a light, stinging slap on the left cheek. What the fuck are you smiling at, lesbo?

Oh no. Id smirked. Shitshitshit.

Werent you listening in theology, smart girl? Laura asked, motioning the other four girls forward so they were crowded around me, in my face. Except for Amanda Simon, now guarding the door. God created Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve.

I sucked in my lips, shaking, with no way to hide it. Id mostly avoided bullies through the yearsmy friendships with the golden boy and the most beautiful, talented girl in our class gave me a cushion I was grateful for every day. But Mia wasnt here. She and Tes were probably holed up somewhere planning that godawful secret wedding.

My mind raced with everything that could happen in the next few minutes: my forehead banging against the sink, being held under the water, their tough girl fists beating me to a bloody, unconscious pulp. These girls could kill me for loving another girl. I could be the next headline.

Whaddaya girls think? Gretchen rasped, lumbering closer so we were nose to nose. The cafeteria meatloaf from hours ago lingered on her breath, not the good kind with ketchup like my mom and I made.

Mom .

Tears welled in my eyes. What would she do without me?

Awwwww, Laura said, eyes dark and glinting. Are you gonna cryyyyyy?

They were like bullies out of an after-school special, so clichd and unoriginal. If I werent afraid for my life, it would be funny.

As the volleyball girls squeezed closer, I spotted a body-sized hole and, hoping I could overpower Amanda at the door, pushed forward, trying to make a break for it.

No dice. Five sets of hands grabbed at me, all over my body: my breasts, my ass, yanking the tail of my shirt out of my skirt. Someone pulled up my skirt, laughed at the fact I wasnt wearing shorts, and smacked my butt hard and fast.

Every unwanted touch burned, like poison seeping through, disabling me further. We moved, a six-person unit with me thrashing and desperate, losing my ability to breathe out of fright. The second story window was open. I hadnt thought of that; they could throw me out. I tasted salty tears and metallic fear and something elseblood. Id bitten my own tongue.

Suddenly, I was over the toilet, someones hands holding my hair back, pulling at the roots.

And I laughed.

Maybe it was gallows humor. More likely, it was relief that Anis friends were so goddamn stupid they couldnt think of anything worse than a swirlie.

The fuck ? Laura yelled behind me. I sneaked a look over my shoulder and saw five volleyball players, who three seconds ago were violently defending their teammates honor, staring down at me dumbfounded. They couldnt believe Id dared to laugh.

This was it.

Feeling completely out of my body, I slammed my head as hard as I could up into Gretchens nose.

SHIT! she screamed, doubling over in pain.

The other girls let go of me, and I shoved past them, successfully this time, my vision blurred. Amanda ran to the team captains aid, completely abandoning her guard dog post, so I knocked open the door with my shoulder and hustled down two flights of stairs, through the empty main hallway, and to my bike, which I unlocked with the speed of light while silently thanking a higher power that Max had a dentist appointment and Tes couldnt drive me today. I headed straight to El Rancherito, a public place, where Carmen would feed me chips and salsa and Mia would give me a bear hug and sing me some Dixie Chicks and no one would hurt me anymore.