Clemens Setz - Indigo

Raaba bei Graz, November 1, 2006

Dear Clemens Setz,

I assume you would like to know everything that happened after you lost consciousness. First we tried to lay you down on the sofa. But the sofa was too narrow, and our physical strength is, as youve seen, very limited, and so you rolled back onto the floor. Thats how you got the wound over your right eye. Of course, we immediately put something on the injured spot (ice, wrapped in a dish towel), but your forehead swelled up quickly anyway. We had, to be honest, not expected you to slide so easily off the sofa. From your external appearance, we wouldnt have thought that even in a horizontal position your bodys center of gravity is somewhere near your belly. After all, youre such a dainty, almost fragile-looking person! Be that as it may, when we saw the lump over your eye, we immediately decided to take you out of the zone and into another room.

You asked my husband and me about the difficulties we have to contend with since our decision to bring Robert back home and now youve experienced those difficulties for yourself. Please be assured that were very, very sorry about that, but I think that the situation has perhaps provided you insight you probably wouldnt have gained from a conversation alone. As a teacher at the institute, you might have been cut off from experiences like that.

We quickly carried you out of the room, because the lump looked really alarming, and you also hadnt responded to our attempts at resuscitation. In the kitchen your condition was clearly improving. You opened your eyes and let us sit you down on a chair, but then you suddenly keeled over again and began to sweat, and your left arm cramped, but, thank God, we were familiar with that, weve all felt that way before. Iceberg thats what we call it. That feeling as if you were buried under tons of ice. Weve all had to go through that. Of course, thats relatively easy to say now, because weve lived with it for a long time and developed a certain resistance, or at least know what to expect. But on an empty stomach as in your case it can certainly knock someone down.

Robert sends you his warm regards, by the way. At least I interpret his behavior along those lines. You never know with him. He probably wont be returning to the institute next year.

We drove you to the hospital. You were a little confused, but we had expected that too, because my father, for example, who visited us shortly after Roberts birth, couldnt speak right for a whole day, he slurred his words and babbled, and he was alternately hot and cold, and he had attacks of vertigo. At first we were worried that he might have suffered a stroke or something like that from shock, but he insisted on holding Robert anyway. Theres a photo of that, taken from the yard through the window.

Its all in the head, Indigo nonsense, my father said. You know, the people of his generation and the way things were in those days, the low level of awareness in the general population, so. Okay, we also wanted to believe that it was all nothing. Nothing lasting, nothing that truly had to do with our child. Nothing real.

You take children by the hand, you touch them, my father said back then, and I just showed him my back, the scrapes I had from falling down so much at that time, the rash on the nape of my neck. I also showed him the burst blood vessel in my left eye. Back then I could still see a bit with that eye, and of course I didnt go to the doctor until it was too late, when the sight was already gone.

Herr Setz, we hope youre doing better. And we want to assure you that we dont harbor any prejudices against you whatever the reason for the premature termination of your work at the institute might have been, we dont presume to judge. If youd like, we can continue our conversation elsewhere. It goes without saying that our house remains open to you, and we welcome your visit, but my husband and I would also understand if you no longer want to expose yourself to what we have constantly had to deal with for almost fifteen years.

With our best regards,

Marianne Ttzel

University Hospital of Graz

Department of Trauma Surgery

Outpatient Unit

Admitted

Patient: Setz, Clemens Johann

Date of Birth: November 15, 1982

Case History/Medical Report

Pt. entered ER accompanied by two self-described acquaintances.

Mental state: alert, clear, oriented, slowed. According to his escorts, pt. lay unconscious on the floor for about 10 min. after accidental fall. Beforehand pt. mentioned a bright flicker at rt. edge of visual field. After collapse no layperson CPR was deemed necessary.

At time of hospitalization pt. not in life-threatening condition, cardioresp. system stable. Rt. frontal bruised tear and gaping, bleeding occipital CLW. Several small hematomas on upper body. Pupils round, medium width, isocoric, no facial paresis or hemiplegic symptoms. No other neurol. abnormalities. Pain on percussion of skullcap. No nausea, but slight disturbance of equilibrium. No other external signs of injury. Joints have full active/passive range of motion, no pain.

Treatments

Frontal wound: cleaning with Octenisept, steri-strips. Suturing of occipital CLW with three stitches. Tetanus shot. Cranial CT scan ordered. Results: No recent hemorrhage, fracture, space-occupying lesion, no sign of recent territorial infarction.

Pt. discharged AMA. Informed of poss. complications and symptoms resulting from fall. If general condition should worsen, pain should occur, etc., pt. advised to proceed immediately to emergency room.

10/16/2006

Dr. Uhlheim

On June 21, 1919, the scuttling of the German Imperial High Seas Fleet took place at the British naval base Scapa Flow near the Scottish coast. The Treaty of Versailles, signed by Germany shortly beforehand, provided not only for the return of the skull of Chief Mkwawa to the British government, but also for the immediate surrender of all ships. But German Admiral Ludwig von Reuter chose to sink his ships rather than relinquish them to the British, whom he regarded as an uncultivated people. The warships have remained ever since on the seafloor at a depth of about one hundred and fifty feet. And thats fortunate for modern space travel, as high-grade steel salvaged on diving expeditions from the wrecks of these warships which have been underwater for almost a hundred years now is used in the manufacture of satellites, Geiger counters, and full-body scanners at airport security checkpoints. The rest of the steel in the world is after Hiroshima, Chernobyl, and the numerous atomic bomb tests carried out in the earths atmosphere too radioactive to be used in the production of such highly sensitive instruments. Sufficiently uncontaminated steel is available only in Scapa Flow, at a depth of one hundred and fifty feet.

With this story begins the remarkable book