Coral Popowitz - Grief Recovery for Teens: Letting Go of Painful Emotions with Body-Based Practices

Regardless of age or background, each of us will experience grief during our lifetime. In GriefRecoveryforTeens, Coral Popowitz shares dozens of things teens can do to find comfort, peace, and renewed hope. Grief hurts. Thankfully, Coral shows teens that they can indeed move forward to find happiness once again.

Neil Willenson, founder of One Heartland for children affected by HIV/AIDS, and cofounder of Camp Hometown Heroes, a free national summer camp for children of fallen US service members

Coral has written a highly relevant, much-needed book for the adolescent population. Her writing connects strongly with the youth of today challenged by their own grief and loss. Her approach, backed by strong, current research in the field, provides an individualized method for understanding and dealing with the very real physical, psychological, and emotional aspects of these difficult and potentially destabilizing life experiences. Her use of a holistic mind-body framework is presented in a truly accessible way. The important information on the adolescent brain and body; how these can be affected by our life experiences; and tools for managing these are well organized. This book offers teens compassionate understanding ofand the tools to work throughtheir unique experiences, not only for managing the loss of a loved one, but also for a variety of life stressors faced by our developing teens today.

WendyL. Baker, MSW, LICSW, cofounder of Family Circle Counseling in St. Paul, MN, adjunct faculty member at University of St. Thomas, and educator and consultant in areas of attachment, trauma, and adoption

GriefRecoveryforTeens is a comprehensive resource offering delicate balance between clear wisdom, concrete activities, and heartfelt stories. Coral covers the impact on mind, body, and heart during the grief experience as she helps teens make the adjustment toward understanding their lives after a death. Her writing is compassionate, informative, and practical. GriefRecoveryforTeens reads as the wise advice of a true friend, and opens the reader to the honest and forthright conversations needed after a death.

Peter Willig, LMFT, FT, clinical director and COO of the Childrens Bereavement Center; licensed marriage and family therapist; and fellow in thanatology with over twenty-five years of clinical experience

Publishers Note

This publication is designed to provide accurate and authoritative information in regard to the subject matter covered. It is sold with the understanding that the publisher is not engaged in rendering psychological, financial, legal, or other professional services. If expert assistance or counseling is needed, the services of a competent professional should be sought.

Distributed in Canada by Raincoast Books

Copyright 2017 by Coral Popowitz

Instant Help Books

An imprint of New Harbinger Publications, Inc.

5674 Shattuck Avenue

Oakland, CA 94609

www.newharbinger.com

Cover design by Amy Shoup

Acquired by Wendy Millstine

Edited by James Lainsbury

All Rights Reserved

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data on file

19 18 17

10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 First Printing

For all the grieving teens I have had the honor of meeting, knowing, and helping.

For all the teachers, mentors, funeral directors, and counselors who have listened and shown me the way.

For my familySteve, Jess, Leo, Georgia, Mickey, Amanda, Avery, Lennon, Lainey, Selina, Alan, Elsie, Lucy, Tommy, Abe, Nicole, Lucas, Brandi, Jonah, Mariah, Johnny, Charlie, and Tiffthank you for being twenty-three of the most amazing and patient, loving and funny, and kind and generous people with whom I get to share my laughter and tears, anger and sadness, and life and love. I count you as my greatest blessing every single day.

For Stevethe true love of my lifemore.

Life is full of change. As the author Doe Zantamata once stated:

If you were to open the front door and see that it had started raining, you wouldnt slam it and curse the clouds because it was sunny just an hour before. Youd get an umbrella and be on your way. Part of embracing change in life is knowing that you will be able to adapt. There is a comfort in the familiar, but new things can be better than before, or the change may even only be temporary. When faced with change thats not in your control, adapt, and be on your way.

No matter how catastrophic a situation is, you will eventually have to accept that trying times are simply part of life. Without these hard times, you will never experience the best days of your life. As hard as it is to see in the moment, our hardships make us into more loving, grateful people who are thankful for each and every thing on this earth. Everyone will experience loss and grief at some point in their lifetime.

I always knew that without loss, there isnt life, but I never fathomed that I would personally lose someone so dear to my heart. June 5, 2013, seemed like it would be an ordinary day; I had no way of knowing that my entire life was about to get turned upside down. That was the night my family received the devastating news that my oldest sister, Kayliemy best friendhad tragically passed away from an epileptic seizure. I was stunned and wondered how this could even be. I was supposed to be a bridesmaid in her wedding that winter. We were supposed to grow old together and be the crazy old sibling pair in the nursing home.

I quickly began to learn that grief is a roller coaster ride of a journey. The first few weeks after her death I was mostly all right, still in shock from the horrific event that happened. Once the initial shock ended, however, I was profoundly miserable, almost to the point of not wanting to live myself. I became the glue for my family, the person who held everything together, and it forced me to mature very quickly. Nothing seemed enjoyable, even things I used to love. I didnt know where to turn or what to do with myself. No one seemed to understand me. Some of my close friends just stopped talking to me because they didnt understand my grief, and I felt awkward around those who did. I felt alone, broken, and lost.

A few months after Kaylie died, my family and I attended grief camp, which is where I met Coral. Id been hesitant about attending grief camp; I thought I would just be sitting in a circle crying with a box of Kleenex. Little did I know that it would forever change my entire perspective on life. After camp, I realized that I needed to change my way of thinking and turn a horrible situation into one filled with positive emotion. Now I strive to do everything I can to help others and make the world a better place. When I first arrived at camp, I was greeted by Corals bubbly, caring attitude. Shes the type of person you would want to help you through your challenges. She changed my life in three short days, and for that, I am forever grateful. We have remained in touch since camp, and I am proud to call her both my mentor and one of my closest friends.

Corals knowledge and expertise on the field of grief and teens is amazing, and I can assure you that she and her book will change your life. I wish that there had been a resource like this book available after I lost Kaylie. I remember searching for books and information about grief for teens and only being able to find picture books for kids and some books for adults. This made me feel even more alone than I already did. So, when Coral mentioned that she was planning on writing a book about grief for teens, I was ecstatic. It was absolutely my honor to assist Coral with her book, providing ideas and even feedback throughout her writing process.