Dorothy S Hunt - Ending the Search: From Spiritual Ambition to the Heart of Awareness

This book is dedicated to

seekers of truth

and to those beacons of light

whose Presence invites us to awaken

to what cannot be spoken

yet shines brightly in the Heart we share.

What is seeking

And the end of seeking?

Who is the seeker?

What has he found?

What need is there

For striving or stillness?

What is freedom or bondage?

...

Nothing is,

Nothing is not.

What more is there to say?

THE ASHTAVAKRA GITA

CONTENTS

Bhagavan Sri Ramana Maharshi 18791950

Adyashanti with the author

FOREWORD

F or as long as we human beings have been walking on this earth, we have been searching for a state of mind or way of living that will redeem the sorrows of life and give us a deep and meaningful experience of being. In a psychological and spiritual sense, we are forever on the move, searching for something that we intuitively feel but have a hard time articulating. This restless pursuit of lasting satisfaction, God, or happiness has defined the human psyche for as long as we know. It seems to me that at the heart of this search is a desire for a deeply rich, profound, and meaningful experience of being. An experience of being that not only justifies but embraces the tragic sorrows inherent in life by orienting us toward the greatest love and wisdom that we are capable of experiencing and embodying. The question is, do we come upon such an experience of being by forever searching for it? Or might there be some other way of orienting ourselves toward this restless longing that might prove to be more fruitful and satisfying?

This book that you now hold in your hands, Ending the Search, is an answer to these two questions. Ending the search does not mean to simply walk away from it. You may change the mode of your seeking, but you will simply pick it back up again in some other more disguised form sooner or later. Neither does ending the search indicate a form of defeatism or failure to engage in something as important as our human aspirations. Truly ending the search is not a denial of the search but rather a wise and loving way of engaging with the desire for a deep and meaningful experience of being. It is a way of engaging with the seeking energy in such a way that you are not looking for satisfaction in what may happen in the future, or in who you may become, but are instead exploring the deeper nature of your immediate experience here and now. As the subtitle to this fine book says, it is about going From Spiritual Ambition to the Heart of Awareness.

There is no future or the exercising of spiritual ambition in this book, nor any attempt to aggrandize or justify the spiritual ego. Nor is this book some sort of cheap shortcut, or clichd promise of freedom with no price to pay. The price will be your spiritual ambition, and the egocentric orientation that goes along with it. Seeking can become a lifestyle with hidden perks for the ego, but to come to the end of the search is to let go of all that is unreal about your current idea of you, and to step into only what is real. In this sense, Ending the Search is ruthless kindness and wise compassion. It speaks of ending the egos search outside of itself and finding in the Heart of Awareness something extraordinary and immediate. Something of great value and meaning beyond mere words. And something immediately available for anyone who is ready to stop right now and see.

This is not a book to simply be read; it is a book to be contemplated, practiced, and lived. Take this book as good medicine, and as a lovingly offered teaching. It is the product of decades of Dorothys experience. You will find yourself, your true nature, being encouraged and reflected on every page of it. For it is a book about younot someone you may become, but something that you inherently are.

Adyashanti

INTRODUCTION

I f you are a seeker of Truth, God, or Self-realization, you no doubt find yourself driven by your spiritual search but unable to end it even by your most sincere efforts. You are caught by the desire for enlightenment or God consciousness, yet time and again you are acutely aware of your sense of separation. You desperately want to end your suffering or your longing, but no matter what you do or where you look, you are frustrated in your search for liberation. You may have tried all manner of spiritual practices, meditation, guru shopping, chanting, prayer, and spiritual reading, and still you have not attained your hearts desire. You imagine you have chosen the path of being a spiritual seeker, but in actuality, the path has chosen you.

If you are such a seeker, you are in a dilemma. You desire spiritual awakening yet may be told by those you imagine are awake that either your desire is not great enough or your desire is the obstacle. You earnestly seek Truth but may be told that Truth cannot be known by your mind. You long for God yet continually feel separate from who or what you long for. You are encouraged to practice one or many spiritual disciplines, all of which require the efforts of your ego, but you are told the real goal is to rid yourself of your ego. You search for someone or something to tell you how to get where you want to go, but you are told there is nowhere to go. You are told to relax your mind but to keep your body perfectly straight. You are told to love your neighbor as yourself but not how to love yourself.

In your search, you are predictably confused and frequently frustrated. Even when you enjoy moments of expanded awareness, peace, and openhearted connectedness, you have no idea how to remain in such a state. However, you feel certain that if you just search long enough, work hard enough, or eventually find the right teacher, the right practice, or the right path, you can achieve your goal of enlightenment. Your spiritual ambition is to obtain the knowledge, wisdom, or grace to live in a state of perpetual happiness and bliss, free from anxiety, problems, and pain. You are sure all of the rewards you imagine will accompany Self-realization will be for your own personal enjoyment. Your search could end at any moment because the truth of what you are is never absent. And yet the time-bound, conditioned mind imagines you are on a journey from here to there.

Ending the Search is an exploration of the so-called spiritual journey, both pre- and post-awakening, with an emphasis on inquiry as an invaluable tool in determining the true identity of the seeker. Many, if not most, spiritual traditions and practices direct their teachings to a self that is seen to be separate from the awakening, enlightenment, or God it seeks without ever questioning who that self is. So the seeker approaches awakening with the ambition of achieving enlightenment through the efforts of his or her egoic mind. While the initial impulse to awaken comes from a deeper dimension of our Being, identified mind often begins to seek awakening in the same way it might seek to get an A on an exam or to achieve success in the world; and failure to achieve ones spiritual goal is viewed as a failure of the me. This failure of the me to either get it or keep it is an important aspect of awakeningone that may invite a deeper surrender to Truth.