Real Talk with God:
How to Get Your Head out of the Ditch of Despair
Lisa Dodge Pinkham
Table of Contents
Real Talk with God: How to Get Your Head out of the Ditch of Despair
Copyright 2018 Lisa Dodge Pinkham All rights reserved.
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ISBN: 978-0-692-03610-5
Scripture quotations marked NIV are taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version. Copyright 1973,1978,1984,2011 Used by permission. All rights reserved.
Scripture quotations marked MSG are taken from THE MESSAGE , copyright 1993, 1994, 1995, 1996, 2000, 2001, 2002 by Eugene H. Peterson. Used by permission of NavPress. Represented by Tyndale House Publishers, Inc. All rights reserved.
Scripture quotations marked NLT are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.
Scripture quotations marked TPT are taken from The Holy Bible, The Passion Translation, copyright 2014, 2015. Used by permission of BroadStreet Publishing Group, LLC, Racine, Wisconsin, USA. All rights reserved.
Scripture quotations marked NRSV are taken from the Holy Bible, New Revised Standard Version. Copyright 1989 Used by permission. All rights reserved.
Cover design and interior formatting: Matias Baldanza.
Dedication
To Anita and all those who have served in the military...
Thank you for your service and sacrifice to our country and for still paying daily for our freedom.
I honor you.
Introduction
I feel completely alone. My life seems utterly worthless. What purpose do I have in staying on this planet? Did I actually just say this out loud? How did I ever get to this place? After thirty hours of emotional disorientation and at the end of a two-hour drive, I found myself completely consumed by these thoughts. My car may have still been on the road, but my head was stuck in a ditch. Shocked and bewildered at the intensity of my despair, I desperately scanned the long list of people who knew me, wondering who I could hang out with while I tried to get myself back on track.
How could there not be a single person in my contact list whom I could turn to without worrying that I would be too much for them or that they would be too much for me, doing more harm than good?
These thoughts totally drowned out any connection I had with God. It seemed as if the One who created me, who had been in my life for over thirty years had quietly slipped out without even saying goodbye. If I didnt have God, and I didnt have others, to whom could I turn? How could I go on with life?
I took a detour and headed for a church that was hosting a twelve-hour open house with local musicians playing worship music. I expected to unobtrusively slip into a corner, sing a little, and reconnect with myself and God. Instead, someone I knew approached me and said she had a prayer she wanted to say for me. Although she did wait for my consent to be prayed for, I felt worse after she finished than I did in my car. What could I possibly do next?
I called my parents and said between sobs, I am having a really rough day. I cant talk about it yet, but would you please just tell me some stories about your new cat? I know you are enjoying her, and she reminds me of the cat we had when I was in high school. The only thing that made sense to me in that meltdown was that I needed to hear a joyful story that somehow connected my past to my present so that I could feel some hope for the future. I did feel better after hearing their stories, and I was able to think more clearly, implementing small action steps to rest and care for myself that day and in the days to come.
My intuition about what I needed eventually became my template for interacting with God. I learned how to get unstuck from negativity and practiced those skills with others. Most of all, I unlocked my heart and came clean with God about my thoughts, feelings, and needs. As a result, I discovered afresh how much He values me and wants me to live a vibrant and adventurous life.
~~~
Now I feel peaceful being with God, and I feel joyful knowing that He is with me. I have learned how to stay in a conversation and keep it real with Him, even, and especially, when I feel confused, sad, ashamed, angry, or afraid. And similar to my parents cat stories, I have heard Him tell me stories that connected my past with my present, giving me hope for the future.
If you could see a before and after picture of my heart, it would look like a scrawny ragamuffin turned award-winning bodybuilder. My inner drive to overcome anxiety and despondency has culminated in a greater vitality and purpose than I thought possible, especially now that I am in my fifties. I relentlessly integrated my education, training, and experiences for my own transformation. Now I enthusiastically coach those who are motivated to get out of their own ditches, access their true selves, and have maximum impact with their lives.
I find myself and those I hang out with laughing, appreciating life, and sharing it with God. We marvel at our curiosity and patience when attacked by challenges. The blank, dark spots of our personal timelines are filled in and illuminated with positive memories and awareness of God's faithful interactions. Partnerships with God and our best, true selves are yielding clear thinking and confident decision-making. As we share this way of relating to God with others, especially during painful and confusing circumstances, our energy and sense of purpose is continually renewed.
I have coaching clients and friends who come to me when they feel stressed, anxious, and overwhelmed with circumstances in their lives. Now, instead of venting, praying half-heartedly, or inflating our should do list, they ask if we can do our usual thing. Together, we practice relaxing, talk briefly about how we are feeling, ask God to help us remember feeling joy and peace in our past and interact with Him about our present situations. With our perspectives reframed, we emerge with energy, clarity, and increased resilience. Clients who are managing anxiety depression, and PTSD have said:
I am healthier than I ever thought I could be. I like God. I like myself.
I am grateful for what I received from you. I have connected God with every decade of my life to today. I have found new goals to strive for with God in present day and daily use.
I have tried everything for years, and this has worked better than anything else.
~~~
I hope that as you read this book, your own joy, peace, and sense of being known by God will be ignited. If we were neighbors, we might share these stories around a meal, on a walk, or while doing chores. A book will have to suffice for now. Please start here. Make time now. Stay with me in this moment before searching elsewhere. Embrace the idea that you have everything you need to talk and listen to God intimately and authentically right now. All you need is: