Backus William - Telling Yourself the Truth

The Good News About Worry

The Healing Power of a Christian Mind

Learning to Tell Myself the Truth

Telling Each Other the Truth

Telling the Truth to Troubled People

Telling Yourself the Truth*

What Your Counselor Never Told You

*with Marie Chapian

1980, 1981, 2000 by William Backus and Marie Chapian

Published by Bethany House Publishers
11400 Hampshire Avenue South
Bloomington, Minnesota 55438
www.bethanyhouse.com

Bethany House Publishers is a division of
Baker Publishing Group, Grand Rapids, Michigan.
www.bakerpublishinggroup.com

Ebook edition created 2012

Ebook corrections 01.02.2014, 05.05.2015

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any meanselectronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwisewithout the prior written permission of the publisher. The only exception is brief quotations in printed reviews.

ISBN 978-1-4412-1101-9

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data is on file at the Library of Congress, Washington, DC.

Unless otherwise indicated, Scripture quotations are from the Amplified Bible, copyright 1954, 1958, 1962, 1964, 1965, 1987 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission.

Scripture quotations identified nasb are from the New American Standard Bible, copyright 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission.

Scripture quotation identified rsv are from the Revised Standard Version of the Bible, copyright 1952 [2nd edition, 1971] by the Division of Christian Education of the National Council of the Churches of Christ in the United States of America. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

Cover design by Eric Walljaspter

William Backus founded the Center for Christian Psychological Services, was a licensed consulting psychologist, and an ordained minister of the gospel. Dr. Backus did follow-up studies of his clients that showed a 95 percent improvement rate compared to a 67 percent success rate for other methods of therapy. He claimed that the difference was the truth of God as revealed in His Word. Dr. Backus died in June 2005.

Marie Chapian , PhD, has been teaching and writing inspirational books to empower Christians in their walk with God for over 20 years, with more than 30 books translated into 15 languages, including Chinese and Arabic. Her Christian writings have earned the Gold Medallion and the Cornerstone Book of the Year awards, among others. Her books include the A H EART FOR G OD devotional series and Free to Be Thin . She holds a doctorate in counseling and a Master of Fine Arts degree in creative writing, is heard and seen on radio and TV, and travels widely as a conference speaker. Visit Marie at www.mariechapian.com.

This book has been written to help you live with the one person you must live with for lifeyou. The precepts set forth here are not new; in fact, theyve been around since the time of King Solomon and before. People become happy and contented by learning how to practice the habits this book describes.

The current writings of the cognitive therapists such as Albert Ellis, A. T. Beck, M. J. Mahoney, D. Meichenbaum and Arnold Lazarus and their scientific points of view, the writings of philosophers such as Titus and Marcus Aurelius, the findings of psychological researchers as well as the probings of the greatest minds of history bring us to the truths set forth in the Holy Scriptures and the principles we share here with you. These principles are so practical and time-testedin fact, Gods own method for destroying the strongholds of evil in the minds of men and womenthat it is amazing the average reader has never heard of such things!

Most of us want to be honest-to-goodness happy human beings who can handle life well and manage to feel good in spite of ever-increasing odds against us. Ironically, we use methods of achieving happiness that make us unhappy. We work at and strive for something that we cant quite catch hold of.

What does it mean to be happy? We could define it as a continuing sense of well-being, a state of feeling good about life, others, and self. We could also define happiness as the absence of mental and emotional discomfort and pain. The Bible calls happy blessed.

Blessedhappy, fortunate, prosperous and enviableis the man who walks and lives not in the counsel of the ungodly.... But his delight and desire are in the law of the Lord, and on His lawthe precepts, the instructions, the teachings of God.

In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus names those who are blessed, or happy. They are people who are spiritually prosperous [that is, with lifejoy and satisfaction in Gods favor and salvation, regardless of their outward conditions].

What is your definition of happiness? After you answer that question, we want you to know that its possible to be happy, really happy in the deepest corners of your being, and to stay that way. You dont have to be a victim of circumstances, events, relationships. You dont have to be trapped by persistent painful emotions.

This book is written to help you possess the happiness you desire and to be the person youd like to be. You can live happily ever after with the person you are and make a profound affect on those around you because of it.

Misbelief Therapy, as we have called our modus operandi, involves putting the truth into our value systems, philosophies, demands, expectations, moralistic and emotional assumptions, as well as into the words we tell ourselves. The Bible says it is the truth that sets man free. Jesus Christ is the living Truth. When we inject the truth into our every thought, taking a therapeutic broom and sweeping away the lies and misbeliefs which have enslaved us, we find our lives radically changed for the happier better.

It is our hope that other professionals will join us in the exciting discovery that truth as it is in Jesus is a teachable way of life which leads to wholeness, restored functioning, and freedom from neurosis.

We ask the indulgence of our professionally trained readers who will find little scientific terminology in this book. We have purposely eschewed psychologese in order that all of our readers will feel comfortable with us.

Recently we completed a research project which involved follow-up calls to every client seen at the Center for Christian Psychological Services in a six-month period. The purpose was to ascertain how well Misbelief Therapy, as we call it, had actually worked in the lives of the clients. The results were gratifying. Ninety-five percent of the clients that had been treated at the Center had improved. Not only that, but these people were able to cite specific behaviors which had changed for the better. They were enthusiastic over the treatment they had received and the results that had been obtained in their lives. That is why we feel confident in recommending that you not only read this book, but that you also put into practice the procedures it offers you for bringing about real change in your life. You will be learning skills which you will want to keep forever.

Psalm 1:1, 2, The Amplified Bible.

Matthew 5:3, The Amplified Bible.

Why do I feel the way I do? cries the troubled person. Typically, he or she wants to put the blame on something or someone else. Its my wife. Shes the one who makes me feel this way. Or, Its all my