Siobhan Miller - Hypnobirthing

Siobhan Miller, the mother of three boys, is an experienced hypnobirthing teacher and founder of The Positive Birth Company, which aims to empower women and their birth partners to create positive birth experiences.

PIATKUS

First published in Great Britain in 2019 by Piatkus

Copyright Siobhan Miller 2019

The moral right of the author has been asserted.

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A CIP catalogue record for this book
is available from the British Library.

ISBN 978-0-34941-937-4

Illustrations on Louise Turpin
Illustrations on Josephine Dellow

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For Oisin, Arlo and Ailbe Fox.
Thank you for choosing me.
Being your mama is the greatest
honour of my life.

The information given in this book is not intended to replace the advice given to you by your GP or other health professional. The author and publisher disclaim any liability directly or indirectly from the use of the material in this book by any person.

Hello! Im Siobhan and besides being the author of this book, Im also a hypnobirthing teacher, the founder of The Positive Birth Company and, best of all, a mum to my three wild boys. Im on a mission to make hypnobirthing more accessible, and I hope this book will enable me to reach more women around the world, helping them to have better births.

Before we begin, I thought Id share a little of my personal experience with birth and how I came to be such a huge advocate for hypnobirthing.

My first son was born when I was just twenty-one, and, although I attended the free antenatal classes at my local hospital, I was not very informed when it came to many aspects of birth. I wanted a natural birth and learnt some effective breathing techniques, but when I was offered an induction at forty weeks and eight days I naively thought that meant I would get to meet my baby sooner, effectively speeding up the waiting game without any negative consequences. I knew very little about the risks associated with induction and had no idea I could decline.

Instead of the quick, straightforward birth I had dreamt of, my induction took two days and involved almost every form of pain relief and intervention that had been mentioned in our antenatal classes. During my induction I spent all my time in a brightly lit hospital room with a TV on in the corner, which at some point was playing a show about plastic surgery gone wrong! I was advised not to eat in case I ended up needing a caesarean. After two days without food or sleep, its little wonder I needed assistance. I was taken to theatre in the early hours for an unplanned caesarean as my baby was showing signs of distress and I was exhausted, but once I was in theatre (having had my epidural topped up so I could feel nothing) the consultant used forceps to turn my babys head and I was given the opportunity to push him out. Which I did. It was an overwhelming moment of relief when he was placed on my chest. I remember him raising his little head and looking me square in the eyes. I remember thinking Im sure babies arent meant to be able to hold their heads up! It was a moment I will never forget. I wasnt traumatised by the experience, but it was certainly a frightening one and not a birth Id describe as particularly positive or empowering. In the months that followed my first sons birth I suffered with severe anxiety and was full of fear about his well-being, which now, on reflection, I attribute to the birth experience. At the time I knew very little about what birth was like, other than what Id seen on the TV and using that as a benchmark my experience, sadly, seemed pretty average.

Fast forward seven years and this is where it gets good! I was pregnant with my second baby and had seen and read enough to know that birth could be different: a positive, magical experience and something to be cherished. So, I signed up to a hypnobirthing course and, without exaggeration, it changed my life. Not only did I feel excited about my upcoming birth but, importantly, I was able to properly process and put to rest what had happened in my previous birth. With my new-found knowledge I was able to understand why so many things had panned out the way they had, and, as a result, felt confident that the same thing would not happen again. I was able to let go of all my fears.

My partner, who initially had been very sceptical about attending a hypnobirthing class, was on board after the first session and an advocate after the second; it was all so logical and scientific. It made absolute sense. In fact, Id go as far as saying that its pretty much impossible not to get on board with it. You dont need to subscribe to any particular school of thought or be a particular kind of person; hypnobirthing is for every person who is preparing to bring a baby into the world, no matter how they plan on doing that. Its as simple as that.

After the course, I planned a home birth quite the opposite end of the spectrum compared to my theatre birth and practised all my relaxation techniques. I remember thinking that even if the birth didnt go as Id hoped, I would still have benefited enormously from the course because I felt so calm, positive and happy in my pregnancy as a result. It was a wonderful time.

I went into labour spontaneously at thirty-nine weeks and six days. My labour was two hours and twenty minutes, start to finish. It was quick and it was intense, but the moment I gave birth on that sofa under the twinkling lights of the Christmas tree I felt the best I had ever felt in my whole life. It was the highest of highs, complete euphoria I was an invincible superwoman! And I rode that high for many weeks afterwards. It really was life-changing not just the birth experience itself but also the profound impact my positive experience had on the postnatal period that followed. I felt confident and capable, happy and relaxed, and in the best place to enjoy my beautiful baby.

Inspired by this incredible experience, and after completing an MSc in Psychology, I then trained to become a hypnobirthing teacher in 2015 with Katherine Graves and began teaching classes.

In 2016 I had my third baby. This time it was a calm, uncomplicated water birth at my local birth centre. It was such a beautiful and peaceful experience. I describe it as almost uneventful, because there was no drama whatsoever (but of course birthing an actual human is pretty bloody eventful in itself!). If my first birth experience had unfolded like a checklist of all the things that could go wrong, my third birth was textbook and followed perfectly the checklist of everything that I had wanted to happen. My second birth was not just a fluke: my third baby confirmed to me the huge positive difference hypnobirthing makes.

I now run hypnobirthing group classes across the UK and remain committed to empowering women and their birth partners to create positive birth experiences, because birth really does matter and a positive experience offers lifelong benefits for mums, babies and entire families.

In 2017 I made it my mission to make hypnobirthing more accessible to everyone, because I strongly believe every woman deserves the best birth possible, as well as the tools to make this a reality. Initially I released a series of free videos on YouTube, then launched the Digital Pack the worlds most affordable and accessible online hypnobirthing programme, which is now being used by thousands of women around the globe. It was an absolute dream come true to be given the opportunity to write this book and share everything Ive learnt in a new format. I knew I didnt want to simply write another book about what hypnobirthing was, so I set out to create an informative and comprehensive handbook that would be enjoyable to read and would equip women with a practical, easy-to-use toolkit that they could use in birth; a book that would actually make their birth better.