Henry James Garrett - This Book Will Make You Kinder: An Empathy Handbook

ADVANCE PRAISE FOR

This Book Will Make You Kinder

I have been a fan of Henrys work for a long time and Im excited for more people to see it.

Jameela Jamil

Interspersed with Henrys beautifully metaphorical illustrations, this is a great and easy-reading practical exploration of what kindness means in the modern world.

Matt Haig

This Book Will Make You Kinder blends distinctly human comics with an academic approach to understanding empathy, from a near-expert on the subject. The result is an affirming, charming book that ultimately lives up to its title.

Adam J. Kurtz

Foundational to our humanity, crucial to our survival, and only limited by our imagination and will, this book will convince you to take a hard look at the mistakes that hamper your capacity for kindness, the power structures that depend on those limitations, and the moral imperative we all have to overcome them. Both a compelling philosophical exploration of morality and a strategic guide to expanding our collective capacity for empathy, this slim book makes an elegant (and beautifully illustrated) case for the power of kindness. Smart, humane, and life-altering.

Thomas Page McBee

Henry Garrett is one of my favorite people to follow on Instagram and as a human. His drawings take complicated issues and make them simple again. He is a master at softening hearts and making people understand and carehis work encourages us to regularly put ourselves in other peoples shoes. This Book Will Make You Kinder is not just beautiful to look at but feels urgent in its message. For many reasons we are in danger of becoming disconnected and dehumanized, and this book is a reminder of the life-changing power of empathy. I hope this book makes it into every school and onto every bookshelf.

Emma Gannon

PENGUIN BOOKS

THIS BOOK WILL MAKE YOU KINDER

Henry James Garrett is a writer, illustrator, and creator of the wildly popular Instagram account formerly known as Drawings of Dogs, now @HenryJGarrett. Before that, he pursued a PhD in philosophy on the subject of empathy and metaethics but dropped out due to anxiety. Instead, he decided to focus on what he enjoyed most: using his warm drawings of all kinds of animals to express thoughtful ideas about wellness, social justice, equality, LGBT identity, and more. Since then, hes written and illustrated a piece on empathy for The New York Times; created alternative Valentines cards for The Fawcett Society; provided Meghan Markle with a feminist drawing of her dog; cartooned for the i newspaper, BuzzFeed, and London Pride; and presented solo exhibitions in London and a beautiful phone box in Brighton. He lives in Brighton, England, with his partner, Kitty.

henryjgarrett.com

@henryjgarrett on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook

PENGUIN BOOKS

An imprint of Penguin Random House LLC

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Copyright 2020 by Henry James Garrett

Penguin supports copyright. Copyright fuels creativity, encourages diverse voices, promotes free speech, and creates a vibrant culture. Thank you for buying an authorized edition of this book and for complying with copyright laws by not reproducing, scanning, or distributing any part of it in any form without permission. You are supporting writers and allowing Penguin to continue to publish books for every reader.

LIBRARY OF CONGRESS CATALO GING-IN-PUBLICATION DATA

Names: Garrett, Henry James, author.

Title: This book will make you kinder : an empathy handbook / Henry James Garrett.

Description: New York, New York : Penguin Books, 2020. | Includes bibliographical references.

Identifiers: LCCN 2020005431 (print) | LCCN 2020005432 (ebook) | ISBN 9780143135593 (hardcover) | ISBN 9780525507246 (ebook)

Subjects: LCSH: Kindness. | Empathy.

Classification: LCC BJ1533.K5 G37 2020 (print) | LCC BJ1533.K5 (ebook) | DDC 177/.7dc23

LC record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2020005431

LC ebook record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2020005432

Cover design: Nayon Cho

Cover illustration: Henry James Garrett

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For my parents, who gave all that they are to make me all that I am.

And for Kitty. Some worry that being too sensitive to the suffering of others forces one to withdraw from doing the work; to them I would like to introduce Kitty, the softest soul and yet the most relentless kindness warrior, who does the work every fucking day.

Contents

T his is a book about kindness as well as its absence and opposite. For that reason, it includes examples of cruelties no one should experience, which many people do. Violence, trauma, and oppression alter the mind-body in ways that those of us privileged enough to have avoided such experiences are rarely cognizant of. An unexpected reference that calls forth a memory or triggers something bodily in someone who has survived what they should never have experienced can cause intolerable suffering. Requests for content notes, then, are not cases of people being oversensitivethat belief is born of a failure of empathy (more on that to come). All this to say: Content notes are necessary, not a big ask, and this is one.

This book will make reference to: sexual violence, rape, dehumanization, mental illness, classism, poverty, migrantism, border policing, homelessness, fatphobia, transphobia, colonialism, police violence, ableism, interphobia, racism, sexism, homophobia, animal cruelty, and dogs attacking a human.

Introduction

T his book will make you kinder. Im not picking on you; its just that youre the one reading it. This book will hopefully make anyone who reads it kinder and will hopefully be read by loads of people.

Ive found that I have to write a book that makes people kinder.

The reason I have to do that has something to do with the fact that I suffer from anxiety. Anxiety sufferers vary a lot; what triggers paralyzing fear in one can be very different from what terrifies another. Some people are stressed by large, open spaces; others, by confined ones; some unfortunate people are stressed by both.