CONTENTS
PRAISE FOR MICHELE BORBA AND UnSelfie
I have never, ever read a book that combines solid research on a timely and critical subjectthe importance of promoting empathywith so many amazing and creative how-to suggestions that turn this research into action. UnSelfie is a must-read! Ellen Galinsky, author of Mind in the Making: The Seven Essential Life Skills Every Child Needs
Once again Dr. Michele Borba has written a book that is not only good but essential . By writing about empathy in the context of our childrens increased technology use, Dr. Borba penetrates the often hidden world of electronics. She does so with a science-based perspective that mirrors our own common sense. UnSelfie is a must-read for parents, teachers, and policy-makers. Michael Gurian, author of The Wonder of Boys and The Wonder of Girls
In this brilliant and timely book, Michele Borba brings into sharp relief the key skill for children making it in the twenty-first centuryempathy.... This book offers a roadmap to a much brighter future. Dacher Keltner, director of the Greater Good Science Center and author of The Power Paradox: How We Gain and Lose Influence
Want your children to be both caring and successful? UnSelfie shows you how.... An engaging read with vivid stories and practical advice, UnSelfie is the most important parenting book you will read this year. Jean M. Twenge, author of Generation Me and coauthor of The Narcissism Epidemic
Dr. Borbas nine-step plan for raising successful, happy kids who also are kind, courageous, and resilient provides a revolutionary new framework for learning empathy. Empathetic kids will thrive in the future, but the seeds of success can be planted todayone habit at a time. Read this book to find out how. Madeline Levine, author of The Price of Privilege and Teach Your Children Well
Countless books advise parents on how to foster their childrens achievement and determination. But in order to succeed in todays world, its just as important to be kind, compassionate, and concerned about the well-being of others. If you care about cultivating these traits in your childand you shouldyoull heed Michele Borbas wise advice. Laurence Steinberg, Ph.D., author of The Ten Basic Principles of Good Parenting
As a parent and educator, I understand why so many of us are worried about the impact of constant connectivity and self-focus our culture so often glorifies. But Michele Borbas UnSelfie gives us such a powerful tool to counteract these seemingly overwhelming challenges. She has wonderful and practical ways to reconnect with our children and guide them so they can develop healthy relationships with others. Rosalind Wiseman, author of Queen Bees and Wannabes
This is the first book Ive read that provides clear, practical, research-based steps for raising empathetic children. UnSelfie is an essential, enjoyable read for parents and educators, a book I plan to keep close at hand as I write, parent, and teach. Jessica Lahey , New York Times bestselling author of The Gift of Failure
For children of every age, Michele Borba shows parentsand all caregivershow a focus on empathy can build moral courage, kindness, teamwork, and self-regulation. She provides a gift to us all in guiding us in nurturing the best capabilities of our most precious resources and showing how natural it is for children to focus on the we and not the me. Maurice J. Elias, Ph.D., author of Emotionally Intelligent Parenting and The Other Side of the Report Card
Dr. Borba pulls the veil off a much-needed topic concerning the unhealthy self-centeredness existing in our world today. Her brilliant insight not only reveals the source of the problem but provides applications and skill-set training. A must-read! Darrell Scott, founder, Rachels Challenge
If we want our children to THRIVE through good and challenging times we must never forget that it is their ability to reach out toand give strength toothers that will make the difference. Here is a powerful book that will make a difference for our children today as we prepare them to be the kind of adults we need to lead our world tomorrow. Kenneth R. Ginsburg MD, MSEd, author of Raising Kids to Thrive and Building Resilience in Children and Teens
If I were asked to recommend just one book to parents, caregivers, and educators that serves as an essential research-based, no-nonsense, go-to guide for raising compassionate, caring, empathic, successful, and happy children, UnSelfie would be my number-one pick.... I cannot recommend this book enough! Trudy Ludwig, childrens advocate and bestselling author of The Invisible Boy
[A] research-based road map with practical, empowering strategies to nurture empathy in a self-absorbed world that so desperately needs it. Inspired, hope-filled, insightful, and hard to put downa must-read for all parents. Amy McCready, author of The Me, Me, Me EpidemicA Step-by-Step Guide to Raising Capable, Grateful Kids in an Over-Entitled World
In this era of increased technology use, UnSelfie emphasizes the important reminder that kindness, caring, and being genuinely connected to others is critical for children. Parents are their role models and teachers in this arena. Borba offers numerous suggestions for helping children develop and exhibit empathy and helping families find ways to connect to each other with digital-free activities. A great read. Tovah Klein, author of How Toddlers Thrive
In UnSelfie , Michele Borba boldly takes on the mistaken modern myths and practices that may lead todays young into the traps of self-absorption, and she offers us a better way. William Damon, Professor and Director, Stanford Center on Adolescence and author of The Path to Purpose
UnSelfie offers a life jacket for those swimming in a sea of selfie culture. Wade in, cast your line, and reel in a plan for raising self-regulated, empathic children. Three cheers for Michele Borba! Mary Gordon, founder of Roots of Empathy
Luckily for us, Michele Borba has focused her attention on one of our most critical issueshow we can raise empathic, caring children.... She makes me hopeful that our next generation of children will be more invested in each other and more committed to creating a better and more just world. Richard Weissbourd, Senior Lecturer, Director of the Human Development and Psychology Program at the Harvard Graduate School of Education
In our time, and around the world, no one is a more trusted voice on character and child behavior than Michele Borba. And no one is better equipped to help us raise more empathic, kinder, happier kids. Thomas Lickona, director of the Center for the 4th and 5th Rs (Respect and Responsibility) and author of Character Matters
Note to the reader:
All the stories in this book are based on cases of children and their families and teachers whom I have known and worked with over the last years. A few stories are composite cases of children I have treated, and their actual names as well as their parents names have been changed to protect their privacy. All examples from schools are gathered from my actual observations. The exceptions are children interviewed for newspapers or written about in books as examples of children displaying the nine habits of empathy.
Touchstone
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Copyright 2016 by Michele Borba
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First Touchstone hardcover edition June 2016
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