Bridge Frankie - Open : Why Asking for Help Can Save Your Life

Brave and beautiful part personal story, part first aid manual for your mind.

Adam Kay, bestselling author of This is Going to Hurt

OPEN is an intimate, honest and powerful read. So personal you want to jump into the pages.

Giovanna Fletcher, bestselling author of Happy Mum, Happy Baby

Unsparing and courageous.

Elizabeth Day, author of How to Fail

Every bit is gold standard.

Cosmopolitan

To you

to help you on your way.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Frankie Bridge is best known as one-fifth of The Saturdays and outside of music, she has established herself as a TV presenter and digital influencer. Frankie became an ambassador for Mind after opening up about her experiences of anxiety, depression and panic attacks after her hospitalization in May 2012. Having initially dealt with these issues in silence, she has been keen to support Mind in making sure that no one has to face a mental health problem alone. Recently, Frankie has been a key player in helping to launch the Mind partnership with the mental health initiative Heads Together, as well as lending her support to Time to Talk Day. In 2019, she launched her first podcast series, Open Mind, focusing on mental health. It debuted in the top ten podcasts upon release.

@FrankieBridge

@FrankieBridge

Select one of the chapters from the and you will be taken straight to that chapter.

Look out for linked text (which is in blue) throughout the ebook that you can select to help you navigate between related sections.

You can double tap images and tables to increase their size. To return to the original view, just tap the cross in the top left-hand corner of the screen.

Ive tried to write this letter to you several times, but each time I tried to begin I struggled to find the right words. But recently I realized that finding the right words, in the right order, at the right time, is not what this book is about.

Simply put, this book is about finding and keeping hold of hope. Because lets face it, when it comes to mental health, hope is often all we have. Your own mental health battles or those of others can make you lose sight of it, but hope is truly the one thing that will keep you going through some of the harder times.

The hope that every day is a new day and that tomorrow could be a better day. The hope that what you are currently feeling and experiencing will pass sooner or later. Remembering to stay hopeful that nothing lasts forever, including great sadness and happiness. The hope that if you speak out and ask for help, you will be taking your first steps towards ensuring that your future will not always be overshadowed by your present.

The truth is, there are lots of things I wish I had told my former self, but most of all its to keep up hope. The Frankie I was when I was unwell isnt the Frankie I am now, largely because I found my voice to speak out and ask for help. But there are many hopeful and helpful things I wish I had told myself when I was suffering that I want to share with you before we go on this journey together, so that you too can find and hold onto hope through the bad times and the good:

Your life is still worth living and your future is brighter than you think. Yes, the dark clouds and the showers will come and sometimes the rain will fall hard without respite for a long time. There will be times when you feel as though it will flood every part of your body and mind and that you will drown because there is no way out. But the sunshine will always reappear, and some days will be brighter and warmer than ever before. Every time you step back into the light, you will grow stronger.

This too will pass. You will not feel this way forever and there will be a moment, although I cant say exactly when, when the clouds will clear and the sun will come out again. You need to give these brighter days as much of your emotion and your attention as the darker days.

You dont need to be fixed and you actually may never be fixed. What human is perfect or normal, anyway? Instead you just need to accept and learn how to live with how and who you are.

Dont try to push down overwhelming thoughts and feelings. It will only make you feel more trapped and cut off from the world. Take the time to learn about your condition and why you feel the way you do. Understanding this will make it much easier to cope when youre overwhelmed by your feelings, because you will have an explanation for what is actually going on inside you and why its happening, rather than trying to control it, react to it or hide away from it.

Give your feelings a name that makes sense to you. I call mine my Sunshine and Showers, which serves to remind me that both states exist within me and one will follow the other.

No one else is in charge of your happiness. Other people can make things easier or they can make them harder, but finding true happiness, deep within, is down to you.

There isnt going to be one thing that makes this all go away. It wont be a career goal you reach, or a material possession you own, or a defining moment in your personal life that will transform you forever. Although these things may give you temporary happiness and relief, it wont last as long as you need it to. The change has to come from within you, rather than from the outside.

Nothing is coming around the corner to save you. You dont need saving, you can save yourself (with the help of friends and family, therapy, medication and whatever else may help make every day that bit easier).

There isnt always a specific reason for your unhappiness. Seek any help you can, go to the doctor, start therapy as soon as possible and take medication if thats what you need. The important thing is to give yourself every chance to get better before you try to fix everything except your mind.

Retraining your mind will be hard, but proving your instincts and automatic reactions wrong can become your superpower. Facing up to anxieties, insecurities and fears, taking them on and interrogating them is so empowering. These thoughts are often not based on reality or on what is actually happening around you, so learning how to stop letting them control you will help you to transform and reprogramme your mind into providing kinder, more supportive thoughts.