Perry Noble - Overwhelmed: Winning the War Against Worry

I wanted to kill myself.

No, that isnt just a figure of speech or an attempt to be overly dramatic. I honestly couldnt get away from the idea that the only way to escape my pain, confusion, and frustration was to take my own life.

At first it was just a passing thought. I was driving home one day, and I distinctly remember looking at a stoplight and thinking, My light is green maybe someone whos coming from the other direction will run the light and slam into my car, and my life will be over.

At that point I sort of snapped back into reality, but from that moment on, similar thoughts would invade my mind every time life threw another overwhelming circumstance at me. I was plagued with thoughts like You need to just end it all and You will never have any relief from this.

The idea of doing something so drastic seemed to come out of nowhere. I was a pastor at a growing, vibrant church; I was married to the woman of my dreams; I had a beautiful daughter who loved me; we lived in a nice house and didnt have any debt; and I was healthier than Id ever been. No one who looked at me from the outside would have been able to tell that Id nearly lost my will to live.

But that was exactly what was happening after years of trying to operate my schedule and responsibilities at an unsustainable pace. Life had finally caught up with me, and I was utterly overwhelmed.

One of the toughest parts about what I was going through was that I didnt think I could tell anyone what I was thinking or how I was feeling because I was afraid people would think I was crazy. So I kept this battle all to myself. As a result, I began to struggle with a whole range of problems.

• Some nights I couldnt sleep... even with the assistance of medicine. And as I lay awake, I would worry and obsess over things that were completely out of my control.
• I began to distance myself from people who were close to me.
• I thought about leaving everyone and everything behind and starting all over again.
• I couldnt recall the last time Id had fun.
• I sank into a deep depression and began having panic attacks.
• Worry became my go-to emotion.
• Everything that happened to me had a dramatic impact on my emotions, whether positive or negative. Emotionally speaking, I was a roller coaster.
• I kept telling myself that what I was going through was simply a season and that once my schedule became less hectic and my responsibilities decreased, I would be fine.

All of us experience stress, anxiety, worry, fear, and depression at some point in our lives. But what I discovered when I was neck deep in this battle was that the church has remained largely silent on this issue. In fact, Ive heard church leaders make the declaration that someone who is a Christian and is in right standing with God will never have such struggles.

This is simply not true. Scripture is full of examples of godly people who experienced trials and suffering and overwhelming circumstances through no fault of their own.

If your life seems overwhelming to you right now and you dont know what to do or how to handle it, you are not alone. There are millions of other people who feel trapped in their circumstances and think they cant escape.

So is there a way out of all of this?

Is there a way to reduce the stress and anxiety in our lives so we wont have to walk around in a medicated, zombie-like state of mind?

Is it even possible to experience emotions such as joy and happiness again?

The answer to these questions is yes; however, the journey there isnt quick and easy. There isnt a formula you can pray or a verse you can memorize that will instantly snap you back into a happy place. But I can tell you from personal experience that there is a way out, and while it will take a lot of time and energy on your part, its worth it.

Today I can honestly say Im more excited and passionate about life than Ive ever been. Dont get me wrong I still wrestle with being overwhelmed. But I now have a much better perspective about how to deal with difficult circumstances when they come my way. My prayer is that after reading this book, you will as well.

Overcoming worry, fear, anxiety, and depression is a journey. I wont be able to offer you three easy steps out of your situation, nor will I share a magical prayer that will suddenly make everything better.

However, I do believe and it is my prayer that each chapter of this book will bring you closer to victory to a place where you are hopeful, not hopeless; peaceful, not anxious; and free, not overwhelmed.