Tony Evans - Living Single

2013 by
ANTHONY T. EVANS

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form without permission in writing from the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles or reviews.

All Scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from the New American Standard Bible, Copyright 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission. (www.Lockman.org)

Scripture quotations marked NIV are taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version, NIV Copyright 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved worldwide. www.zondervan.com. The NIV and New International Version are trademarks registered in the United States Patent and Trademark Office by Biblica, Inc.

Edited by Jim Vincent

Interior design: Ragont Design

Cover design: Thinkpen Design

Cover image: 2013 Shutterstock image #51503998

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Evans, Tony, 1949
Living single / Tony Evans.
pages cm
ISBN 978-0-8024-1010-8
1. Single people--Religious life. I. Title.
BV4596.S5E928 2013
248..84--dc23

2013016458

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A pastor who happens to be married is always on dangerous ground when he approaches the issue of singleness. Invariably he hears the accusation, Pastor, you dont understand. Youve been married for so long. By the time you knew what singleness meant, you werent single anymore!

Its natural for people to feel that you cannot relate to them because you havent experienced what they are experiencing. However, the truth of the Word transcends our experiences. I have never been an alcoholic, but I can tell you what the Bible has to say about it. I can speak because God has spoken.

Nevertheless, I understand the need of many of you to hear from someone who knows firsthand what the single lifestyle is really like. Thats why I have chosen to borrow heavily for the content of this booklet from the words of someone who was single for a very long time, even though he probably was married at some point in his life.

Im talking about the apostle Paul.

The apostle Paul understood the single lifestyle far better than the social commentators of our day. His inspired words in the New Testament present us with a challenge that cuts across the grain of our society:

Being single is more desirable for a Christian than being married.

Theres a good deal of controversy surrounding that concept, even though it is every bit as biblical as John 3:16. Make no mistake about what Paul is saying: If you are single, you are in the best possible position.

A single woman was talking with her pastor one day, discussing the subject of marriage. The pastor said, You know, God has designed the perfect plan for marriage: one man and one woman together for life. You cant improve on Gods plan.

Pastor, I dont want to improve on it, the woman replied. I just want to get in on it.

Thats the way many single people feel today. They fear they are missing out on Gods plan or Gods best for their lives because they arent married. Many singles feel as if their lives are in a holding pattern, like an airplane that is supposed to be landing at its destination but has been ordered to circle the airport.

Ive flown enough to know what its like for the pilot to come on the intercom and announce that the plane has been denied permission to land for whatever reason. Holding patterns are very frustrating because you are helpless. You didnt choose the situation, and there is nothing you can do about it. All you know is that you want the pilot to get the plane on the ground so you can get off of it.

One particular time when this happened to me, it seemed like we had been circling for hours. I kept looking at my watch and then looking out the window to see if there was any indication that we were moving closer to the earth. After enough times of going back and forth between my wrist and the window, I decided that I would take out some work that I had brought with me and focus on it instead. Before long, I became so involved with what I was doing that I forgot we were still in a holding pattern altogether.

Singles, God has so much for you to do while you are waiting for a mate, and He can satisfy you so fully with what you are doing that you literally forget what you feel like you are missing out on.

I couldnt control how long the pilot kept us in the holding pattern in the sky. But I could control what I did with the time that I was up there. Likewise, I do not know how long it will be before God addresses your singlehood. What I do know is that He does not expect you to be wasting your time while waiting. He wants you to wait on Him for direction, sure, but to do so in the context of maximizing living single.

If you are a Christian single person who loves God and wants to honor and serve Him with your life, then I want to speak to you from Gods Word, because the Bible contains some very important, challenging, and encouraging principles for Christian singles. (These principles also have implications for married people, as well see.)

The Scripture deals with the subject of singleness head-on in 1 Corinthians 7:2540, where the apostle Paul was in the process of answering his readers questions concerning marriage and singleness. Paul was the right person to handle these issues, as I mentioned earlier, because the evidence suggests that he had been married at one time and then lived for many years as a single person. So he knew what it was like to have a mate and to be alone.

Paul must have been married because before his conversion he was a member of the Sanhedrin, the supreme council of Jewish leaders, which required its members to be married. Perhaps his wife had died, or she may even have left him when he came to Christ. The point is that Paul knew what it was like both to have a mate and to live as a single person.

Theres another reason 1 Corinthians 7 is so important to the issue of marital status, which is that Paul was speaking by divine revelation. So what he wrote in this portion of Scripture is the Word of God and not just one mans opinion. And in 1 Corinthians 7 we find at least three vital principles for singles. We can summarize these as waiting on the Lord, working for the Lord, and being wedded in the Lord. These main components that make up much of what it means to be single will be the focus of our time together in this booklet, and it is my prayer that after reading it, you will not only embrace singlehoodif that is where God has youbut you will also maximize every moment in which you are single.

And while I want to acknowledge before we go deeper into singlehood that most people are probably not called to be single but they are single by default simply due to the sinful world in which we live (growing up in broken homes, not enough Kingdom-minded mates available to marry), Paul makes it clear that if you are single, God can make your situation a blessing rather than bitter if you look to Him to do it. If this is you, take courage and pride in your position because God Himself is your purpose. You have been made for Him. As He says in Isaiah, For your husband is your Maker, whose name is the Lord of hosts; and your Redeemer is the Holy One of Israel, Who is called the God of all the earth. For the Lord has called you, like a wife forsaken and grieved in spirit, even like a wife of ones youth when she is rejected, says your God (Isaiah 54:5, 6).