Tony Evans - Help and Hope for the Single Parent

2014 by
ANTHONY T. EVANS

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All Scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from the New American Standard Bible, Copyright 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission. (www.Lockman.org)

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ISBN 978-0-8024-8942-5

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M y heart was broken recently when the son of one of the single parents in our church looked up at me and said, Pastor, why wont God give me a dad? Every night I ask God to give me a dad, but He wont give me one.

What would you have said to him? I didnt have any easy answers for that young man, but I tried to explain to him that he did have a father, his heavenly Father. Yes, that concept may be beyond his worldview right now, but I wanted him to know that he was not alone. And I want to say to single parents that they are not alone either. Single parent, God has a word for you, and its a word of hope and comfort.

Thats not to say there isnt plenty of disturbing news out there when it comes to the issue of single parents. What used to be considered rather unusual not too many years agoa family with only one parent presentis now a crisis of growing proportions. The reality in our culture today is that a staggering number of children are growing up in single-parent homes, the vast majority of which are fatherless.

In 1970, for example, only 13 percent of children grew up without both parents being at home. But today that number is over 30 percent in the culture at large with over 21 million children being raised in a single-parent home. For African-American children, that percentage more than doubles to over 70 percent. Were talking about millions of children growing up in homes where in most cases they will know little or nothing of a fathers influence. I know that mothers are leaving their families too, but the numbers are still heavily weighted toward missing fathers.

Statistics show that close to half of all American children will go through at least some part of their lives without having a father at home. The implications of this situation are staggering in terms of the world we have to live in and minister to. This is not theoretical for me. My church in Dallas is not immune to the problem. One Sunday morning I asked single parents to raise their hands; then I asked those who had been raised in a single-parent home to raise their hands. In each case a large number of people put their hands up and the problem is only getting worse.

So we need to ask, What does God have to say to single parents today? What hope and comfort does He offer to the mother who is alone and fears for her childrens future because they have no father at homeand fears for herself because she has no mate? What does the Bible say to the small but growing number of fathers who are rearing children alone?

Before we turn to the Scriptures, let me say a word to the reader who may be thinking, This is not really my problem. Im not a single parent. Let me say that Gods Word to single parents will benefit you too, for two reasons. The first is that all Scripture is profitable. Many of the principles and truths well consider in this booklet will also help two-parent families in their child-rearing task. The second reason you need to know what the Word says on this issue is that you may be just one step, one heartbeat, one accident away from becoming a single parent. It could happen to any of us at any time. And as much as we hate to think about it, our homes could also be hit by divorce, death, or abandonment.

What Im saying is that none of us is immune to the problems of life, so we need to know what God says.

Besides, even if your home stays intact you will have to deal with this issue as a Christian and a citizen of this country because the fallout of family breakup is hitting all of us. Your children may be sitting in a classroom right were all paying a huge economic, social, and spiritual price.

So we need a word of encouragement and hope and correction from God. First of all, I want you to know that God is for the single parent. No matter how you became a single parent, if you love God and have a heart for Him, He is for you.

In Psalm 27:10, David says, My father and my mother have forsaken me, but the Lord will take me up. David is saying that God will be a parent when a parent is missing. God will take up the slack caused by the absent parent. Thats good news. Its good to know that your child has a mother you didnt know he or she had and has a father if he or she doesnt know where the earthly father is. There is a saying I sometimes make, If you dont have a mother, He will be your mother. If you dont have a father, He will be your Father. He will be a lawyer in a courtroom and a doctor in a hospital and whatever else you need.

God can meet your need. Even though you may not have an ideal home situation, you do have an ideal God. Filmmakers use fancy technology to turn a character in a film into someone else. God says, If you need Me to be a father, I will be a father. If you need Me to be a mother, I will be a mother. If you need Me to be a spouse, I will be a spouse. If you need Me to be a friend, I will be a friend. I will be to you whatever you need. Thats a good word for you if there is somebody important missing in your home.

David writes in the book of Psalms that God is a father of the fatherless and a judge for the widows (Psalm 68:5). If your child does not have a father, thats not the whole story because God is a Father to the fatherless. God also acts in justice on behalf of a widow. A widow includes those who have been abandoned by a spouse.