Jess Eva - Why Wouldnt Ya?

Jess Eva wants you to change your life.

She cant promise to make you rich, quick-fix your relationships or help you lose weight. But she is going to show how to relax, get out of your own head (and other peoples) and start to see life as one big adventure.

Are you a negative narcissist? Has your inner narrative made you a victim of your own thoughts? Have you searched for validation in the spiritual penis? Jess has MANY TIMES!

The stories we tell ourselves about our worth are so important, and we often get it so wrong. Incredible people deserve to know theyre incredible. And thats YOU! Instead of focusing on what you should be doing, Jess will help you start to do all those things you really want to because why wouldnt ya?

As Jess will show you, through her humour, mad stories and down-to-earth wisdom, the worst that could happen is youll end up with a bloody good story to tell.

This book is dedicated to anyone who has ever doubted themselves. To anyone who ever thought they werent good enough. Were going to capture your self-worth, together.

You have one life: to waste it existing opposed to living is a modern-day tragedy, yet most of us are guilty of this. Today is the day you stop existing and start living.

During this book I need to talk to you personally. Youre reading this, so were already friends, and if we ever meet we NEED to have a wine together. Also, all friends have nicknames, so your nickname is Knackers. Why? Because... look, dont question me, Knackers, just keep reading, weve got work to do! (Did we just have our first fight?)

Think of something you want to do right now, and ask yourself: why wouldnt ya? Im guessing the reasons why you wouldnt dance around the subject of failure. STOP IT, KNACKERS! This is a negative habit you have taught yourself and have spent your entire life practising. So lets take that out. Lets strip away every response you have that surrounds failure or what if or but.

Now, what other reason do you have to not do this? This time your mind may go to some kind of hurdle like family or lack of time. STOP IT! This is your mind trying to self-sabotage you! Fuck off, brain! You have created this excuse this predefined neurological pathway for decades; its normal for your mind to jump on autopilot and fly in self-sabotaging mode. But we need to break that habit NOW. Think about a time youve changed something in your house like, say, where you kept the kitchen bin. After you moved it, it took time, right, to re-train your brain, and stop going back to where the bin used to live? Well, your brain doesnt miraculously work a different way for any other habit. Youre letting what you knew and learnt in the past influence your future, which, okay, makes sense in theory. But what if what you knew and learnt in the past was wrong? What if you are creating your future based on past bad habits? We need to break those bad habits. And I mean break them. You cant just run away from them.

I once moved to India for enlightenment. Turned out I was every bit as screwed up there as I was here, just in a different geographical location and $1500 poorer from the plane ticket. Yep, your pesky little brain, with all its flaws, will follow you around like a bad smell, no matter where you go. So it doesnt matter where you are, what youre doing, how time poor you are. Do you want a better life? Lets do it together!

Some self-help books tell you that in order to have a purposeful life you need to work on having the perfect relationship, or start your own business, or make a million dollars working two hours a day, three days a week. Which of course never happens, so you feel like a bigger screw up than when you started the book and the only solution seems to be to wallow in your self-misery by eating a jar of gherkins and sucking down a pineapple Vodka Cruiser. But guess what: self-motivation and having a kick-arse life arent always about having a freaking boyfriend or an ABN or some kind of bullshit mood board. I personally hate crafts, so the thought of achieving a dream by having to cut out stuff from a magazine, glue it onto a piece of poster paper and look at it every day only puts me in the mood to scull a bottle of wine and take my top off. In saying that, hmmm, taking my top off... Why wouldnt ya?

So now Im topless. By myself, with a dog. Why? Because Im 36 and can do whatever I want. Here, Ill prove it to you and take a webcam shot:

Please note, Knackers: my nipples have been replaced by my dog Denises face. Just in case you were worried my breasts had developed three black areolas and hair.

Anyway, my point is, Im 93 kilograms of average-looking white chocolate. If I can sit here topless like some weird uncooked chicken with only my dog for company, Im sure you can have a crack at doing whatever it is you want to do!

Maybe you just want to experience life at a better level. Maybe you dont want to be held back by the word no. Maybe if you said Why wouldnt ya? to more things you would experience more, and better, things. Its the power of asking yourself, How do I do that? when you see or hear someone else doing something youd like to do. Its about seeking the power of doing as opposed to wishing. It doesnt matter where youve come from, what circumstance you are in: the only thing holding you back is your mind. The only person holding you back is you ! I promise you, Knackers, this is true! You are capable of whatever you want to achieve (except for maybe coding, that looks really hard and very boring to learn). Listen to me! Youve seen me topless, I wouldnt lie to you! You are the Google Maps of your own destiny and despite what your mind tells you, youre the one behind the steering wheel.

Your previous habits may make you tell yourself you are an arsehole, that you dont deserve what you aspire to achieve. The world is full of people who think theyre arseholes. Every person on the planet has doubted themselves and thought they were not enough. Your kind old neighbour whos always offering you lemons from her tree, your hairdresser who could talk under water, the guy on the street who picks up your groceries when the shopping bag handle shits itself: all of these people have thought they were an arsehole. Our inner narrative is constantly reminding us that we arent enough, we need to do more, we need to make more money, we need to be kinder to our children, our friends and our partners. But I want you to know, everything you are doing IS enough. Its the story we tell ourselves that is failing. We hunt down the evidence to support our self-hatred and lack of self-worth, yet we dismiss the evidence of everything we are doing right. We rob ourselves blind of our inner worth every day by comparing ourselves to an impossibly perfect life. I call it the shoulds. I should be better. I should earn more money. I should have a new house. I should be able to go to the shops without the kids crying. That life doesnt exist... for anyone! You ARE enough, you ARE worth loving and you ARE capable of peace and fulfilment. Unfortunately, youre the last person to realise it. There is scientific evidence that proves we create habits around self-hate, hating others and sabotaging our own lives. But you can stop that now.