Preface to the
Second Edition

There are many people who simply cannot stand the sound of their own voice and are ashamed of the way they talk. They avoid opportunities for social conversation and presentations that would advance their careers because of their personal discomfort in just speaking to others.

Perhaps you are one of these people. If so, here is something you should know: many of the fluent, comfortable, natural born speakers that you hear conversing or presenting were actually terrified people who have found their way to success through appropriate training and practice.

Perhaps you can be one of those people.

In the first edition of Its the Way You Say It , I told the stories of my clients who were trying to deal with their personal communication issues. My readers have let me know that these stories were very important in helping them identify their own concerns and in seeing that there are actually ways of developing into more confident communicators. More stories are pouring in from around the world by phone and e-mail (a daunting example: Dr. Fleming, I love my wife dearly, but I cannot stand the sound of her voice!). So I am grateful indeed for this opportunity to include some of these stories in this revised edition of my book.

I am finding that the possibility of a new hope is the constant element in my clients and readers alike. They simply did not realize that there were things to know and do that would help them change and make a tremendous difference in their lives.

Many self-help authors have told me that they write their books in order to drive people to their website, to book more speaking engagements, to increase their client base. Not me. I just want to give you hopethat your misgivings can be addressed, that there are solutions, and that you can change. Thats all.

Maybe if I tell you how I got here, youll see where all this hope is coming from.

I met a child who could not walk. He could not sit up or hold up his head. He could not talk. His mother had brought him into my parents shoe store for special corrective shoes. But to see his skin-on-bone arms and legs, you knew this child would never wear out these shoes; would not even outgrow them.